“Super-Secret Cypher Snatch”
Alliteration with a whiff of desperation, and an unfortunate innuendo.
The Bionic Woman
Might have been acceptable for an episode of Fame, but even then, it’s doubtful.
“Four To Doomsday”
Four what to Doomsday?
“Tomorrow, The Rat”
“The Unorthodox Shepherd”
The Man From Atlantis
“The Sort Of Do-It-Yourself Dreadful Affair”
The Man From UNCLE
A self-fulfilling prophecy.
The Six Million Dollar Man
And they say standards in science teaching are bad today?
“A Nut For Marineville“
Blimey, what’s this? The episode where they had to call in the maintenance man?
“Confetti Check A-OK”
Title check, far from okay.
“And The Rock Cried Out No Hiding Place”
Seems to be attempting to recapture the poetry of those original Trek titles, but even though it's a misquote from a gospel song, it just sounds pretentious. And baffling.
“The Gun On Ice Planet Zero”
Battlestar Galactica (1978)
A stunningly banal bunch of words cunningly combined into a phrase even duller than any of the individual elements. Quite a feat.
Smallville always uses single-word episode titles, but that’s no excuse. What next? Hiccup? Burp? Belch? Fart? (Actually, we'd like to see a Smallville episode called "Fart”).
Low music and candles as well, presumably. Maybe they could have translated it into Romanian to give it more oomph.
“DNA Mad Scientist”
We just don’t get this one? Is it a pun we’re missing?
“The Rules of Luton”
Inspired when the show’s American producer was driving to Gerry Anderson’s studios at Pinewood and passed a road sign for Luton… which he thought sounded suitably exotic and alien. We kid you not.
“Tigh Me Up, Tigh Me Down”
The grimmest, dourest, most serious SF show in history really should not do puns. Even if they're good puns. Which this isn’t
Just a bad idea. We get the joke – the show is set in LA, the city of angels. But as an episode title, it just looks like a typo.
“Ex Deus Machina”
Erm, any reason for swapping round the words?
“The Terribly Happy Embalmers”
Adam Adamant Lives!
Good for them. Next!
Oh good grief. The phrase "déjà vu" has been the subject of many heinous crimes against punning in episode title history and this is one of the worst.
“Three Men And A Smoking Diaper”
The Lone Gunmen
“Diaper” should never, ever be used in an episode title.
“Some Must Watch While Some Must Sleep”
Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles
An open invitation to TV critics.
“Cosmic Whiz Kid”
As soon as those words come up on screen, your Pavlovian reaction is to switch off.
Take Your Pick
It’s impossible to pick just one bad Charmed episode title. The show turned cringingly bad puns into an art form. Indeed, may suspect that the writers sat around coming up with the titles first, then making up the plots afterwards. So, "witch” is the winner? (Sorry) You decide. It’s a tough call:
From Fear To Etenity
Be Careful What You Witch For
A Knight To Remember
Charmed And Dangerous
Witches In Tights
A Witch In Time
Y Tu Mummy Tambien
Sand Francisco Dreamin’
Sense And Sense Ability
Valhalley Of The Dolls
Hyde School Reunion
Crimes and Witch-Demenours
The Bare Witch Project
Styx Feet Under
The Seven Year Witch
Malice In Wonderland
Battle Of The Hexes
Gone With Witches
The Jung And The Restless