The Top 7... Unsexy Femme Fatales

"The Sag Hag"

Who is she? Slash. When she's not head banging to death metal, blasting bazookas off her nitro-fueled hog or waging war for control of cyberspace, Slash enjoys writing introspective poetry.

Where's she from? Heavy Metal: Geomatrix (2001 - Dreamcast)

What the hell is wrong with her? Okay. The name? Not sexy. The nail-studded shoulder pads? Not sexy. The parachute straps barely holding up her saggy thong? Not sexy. The tin can goggles transforming her already repellant face into that of an irate insect's? Not sexy. The hay bushel of a haircut? Definitely, definitely not sexy. The beauty mark right above her lip? Ironic, yes. Sexy, no.

But based on the lavish attention devoted to rendering and highlighting every one of Slash's naughty bits, the designers must have intended for us to find her overwhelmingly attractive. Does the videogame industry really think we're that blinded by a pair of knockers? Or is it just that they are?


Top 7


  • edw0027 - October 17, 2009 4:23 a.m.

    the first one isnt that bad in the beginning of the video. and you could always put a bag over her head
  • SteelStreet - September 29, 2009 6:51 a.m.

    The funniest thing was when he tried to run away in the nomad soul.
  • thochaos - October 29, 2008 7:35 a.m.

    Holy shit, I'd forgotten how awesome I thought battle Arena Toshinden 1 & 2 were back in the Playstations' early days. Oh, good article too.
  • skyguy343 - October 29, 2008 12:17 a.m.

    slutty AND bitchy!?! HOT DAMN I'LL TAKE FOUR!!
  • mozaralio - October 28, 2008 11:56 p.m.

    w00t 2nd comment hmm ok well I agree all those characters were unsexy idk about you but some of the ermm prostitutes? in saints row one were pretty unsexy then again I odnt know if they were supposed to be any way nice article
  • GGsBeat - October 28, 2008 11:13 p.m.

    wow i did not know most of these so called "vixens" existed oh and uhm first i think
  • uz_mike222 - August 19, 2009 8:27 p.m.

    @geosteiner she's in a different Top 7 article dude but nice read
  • zombie95 - July 14, 2009 4:53 a.m.

    dood i know a chic named ashley, shez a cheerleader and she acts like a slut and she iz a bitch sumtimez and she is really hot(big titz 2) and she live like 5 minz away from me(walking). Also there is this other girl she isnt hot but she iz cute, she live close 2 but she has medium sized titz. lolz
  • AnonymouZ - July 9, 2009 11:42 p.m.

    who the hell minds thongs anyway? And... like a comment above, hadn't even heard of most of these ladies. Still a pretty entertaining read x)
  • AA95mp - January 18, 2009 3:52 p.m.

    @skyguy343:your not the only one
  • geosteiner5 - July 15, 2009 10:31 p.m.

    where the hell is that fat cop from dead rising?
  • sdmitch16 - July 14, 2009 4:39 a.m.

    Uranus in an angelic woman in that game.
  • TheHumbleSlave - July 9, 2009 11:52 p.m.

    I don't think Shahdee looks bad at all. I'm not saying that she is all too beautiful, but she looks okay.+
  • doomdoomdoom - July 9, 2009 10:14 p.m.

    My eye's are bleeding and my ears are screaming AT LEAST BLUR THE FACES!!!!!
  • kryptkeeper666 - July 9, 2009 8:11 a.m.

    maybe its just cuz ima fucked up goth kid... but i dont mind the PoP chick... Shes a royal pain to fight though..

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