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The Top 7... Secret shame games

4. Stretch Panic

What the hell is this? A game about interactive geometry. It was supposed to be an action/platform game, but that didn't seem to work out.

Whose fault is it? Treasure, the folks behind stuff like Gunstar Heroes and Ikaruga.

What happened? Treasure's output has had its ups and downs, but out of everything they've done, only Stretch Panic is the only game that can be considered truly bad - and boy, is it ever a stinker. The game's premise involved a girl with a demonically possessed scarf that could grab and pluck at things in the world, stretching and warping them in various ways. It looked like a quirky, innovative gameplay system, and the game received generally good press and even a few awards when it was first shown at E3. Sadly, the final product's gameplay never improved past what was initially shown in the demo. The play mechanics were clunky and unpolished, the stages and bosses were dull, and the whole thing was much too short. Stretch Panic, despite all of its potential, wound up being a playable tech demo rather than a game.



Aftermath: The game was a debacle for everyone involved - Treasure suffered a blow to its reputation, and publisher Conspiracy Entertainment took a huge hit when the game flopped horribly. Treasure eventually recovered, Conspiracy hasn't seemed to. Also of note: too-hardcore-for-you-sheeple startup mag GameGO! featured Stretch Panic on the cover of its first issue. And, as it turned out, its only issue. Coincidence?

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24 comments

  • BearzUnlimited - May 25, 2012 1:28 p.m.

    Umm...how about Valve's Ricochet? Valve themselves even joke about how terrible it was.
  • 2cute2Bcruel - September 29, 2010 6:45 a.m.

    OMG! I had no idea that Delphine made Shaq-Fu! What were they thinking?
  • gamemaster100 - June 14, 2009 9:26 p.m.

    i never even knew any of these games
  • killemall - April 27, 2009 8:42 p.m.

    Sorry GR i know you mean well and this article is quite entertaining, but i have to agree with Ballplayer on this one... If the games is that bad why would i spend carsh/time/energy on it? Especially when i could be finally purchasing Okami (better late then never, ne?)
  • Unoriginal - March 11, 2009 6:38 p.m.

    Is there anything Shaq didn't put his face on for some cash?
  • NevetsNooney - March 9, 2009 9:02 p.m.

    Who in thier right mind woud make a game about truck racing. I mean come on!
  • m_gamer234 - March 6, 2009 2:40 a.m.

    oh my bad i forgot to mention i was laughing about that shaq fu game
  • PreyingMantis - March 4, 2009 1:56 a.m.

    lol shaq-fu
  • midknight8 - March 3, 2009 12:37 a.m.

    And holy crap, american pro trucker was sitting next to my computer just now. I had just found it in a desolate corner of my room, buried under a pile of dirty clothes, pokemon cards and milky way wrappers. I was going to play it cause i didn't even rmember owning this game now i know not to.
  • midknight8 - March 3, 2009 12:30 a.m.

    Never heard of stunt fx, looks like crap And ninety nine nights doesn't look so terrible
  • cart00n - March 2, 2009 9:42 p.m.

    I actually LIKED the idea of Shaq Fu, a game based on a sports hero that didn't involve sports. It was unexpected, which I thought was pretty cool. It's just too bad that the game sucked so hard...
  • Gaffelstein - March 2, 2009 8:19 p.m.

    I loved Justice League: Task Force when I was a kid. I thought i sucked at it, turns out it was just the game that sucked.
  • NeoKef - April 26, 2009 2:25 a.m.

    I remember me and mine friends trying to beat each other on Shaq-Fu. It was who ever pushed the most button under the 2mins.
  • AuthorityFigure - April 25, 2009 1:55 a.m.

    Stunt Race FX is not as bad as all that.
  • ballplayer27 - April 5, 2009 10:28 a.m.

    So wait... Stretch Panic, the terrible terrible terrible game that you are making fun of in this article, is listed as one of the games that we should play before we die on the 59 levels that everyone should play article. eff that. I am not going to intentionally find and play a game that you said is terrible, despite you then immediately saying that I should play it at some point. Bad GR, do not mess with us like that. (And yes I know the 59 levels article admitted this was a bad game and you should only play it to experience the quirkiness, but still, why should we play it if you say it is so shameful the developer would rather it had never happened?)
  • Mrnicelupe - March 8, 2009 7:52 p.m.

    Stretch Panic? Bad? Oh dear, this is just not right Then again, the "Playable tech demo" comment is probably right, but still and good example of what could make a good game!
  • gdubbs359 - March 8, 2009 12:18 a.m.

    Nice Youngblood#1 reference.
  • m_gamer234 - March 6, 2009 2:38 a.m.

    NO...FUCKIN...WAY...LLLLLLLOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLLLLLLL....That is so hilarious!
  • Heyexclamationpoint - March 4, 2009 1:35 a.m.

    I actually liked Stunt Race FX, for some reason. I was a dumber kid than I realize.
  • RaIdEn - March 3, 2009 1:04 a.m.

    i heard of shaq fu from that ultimate showdown video

Showing 1-20 of 24 comments

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