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The Top 7... Outrageously Camp Bad Guys

It's been said before, but we're going to keep saying it. When compared to Kefka, Sephiroth is exactly as interesting as a dead accountant painted brown. Matt brown.

Think of him as Final Fantasy's equivalent of The Joker (Heath Ledger version, not Cesar Romero), only far, far more dangerous. After an abusive orphanage upbringing, Kefka initially enjoyed a successful life as a decorated general of the Gestahl Empire before an experimental infusion of magic drove him completely and utterly mad in the face. But oh, what a glorious madness it was.

Where lesser Final Fantasy villains would brood and glower (*cough*Grey-haired sword guy*cough*), Kefka launched himself into his work with a genuinely child-like glee. Garishly dressed, smeared with make-up, and always accompanied by the shrill, girlish sound of the greatest bad guy laugh in history, he may not have looked like the biggest threat in the world, but good God was he ever exactly that.

Above: A startlingly in-character convention appearance by now-notorious cosplayer and gameing comedy film-maker CJ Collins.

As Kefka's madness grew, so did his hedonistic nihilism and in turn, the scale of his crimes. Seemingly terrified of a straight fight, he would scamper away from battle squealing like a kicked piglet, but the real danger always came from his bigger schemes. He'd poison an entire city's water supply rather than wasting time trying to attack it. He'd think nothing of screwing with cosmic harmony in order to make himself more powerful, even if the unfortunate side-effect was global apocalypse.

And as his homicidal narcissism evolved into a tantrum-led hate-hate-hatred of everything in existence, he took the only logical course of action and turned himself into a god; forming a religion around himself and smiting the crap out of anyone who wouldn't worship him. All while flouncing around, cackling like a drunken eight-year old and throwing out pithy disdain at anyone less worthy than himself. Which, as he saw it, was everyone.

Notable also-ran

While Alfred Ashford, effeminate antagonist of Resident Evil: Code Veronica, could never hope to match Kefka's scope or ambition, he took a similar stylistic approach to evil. He needlessly dressed in theatrical military garb. He asserted his own importance and put down those around him. He cackled like a loon and minced about everywhere he went. And he naturally gets massive bonus camp points for dressing up as his comatose sister.

Not even Kefka did that. But if he'd had a sister, she would have been in a coma. Because he'd have put her in it. For a giggle.



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Topics

Top 7

39 comments

  • AA95mp - December 21, 2008 2:54 p.m.

    machine gun nipples????????????
  • RedOutlive10 - February 10, 2009 6:09 p.m.

    Kefka was really memorable and full of personality, this plus FFVI's story were the main reasons I still think of Final Fantasy VII as overrated. Not bad, just not as good as the other FF games many people never played.
  • Danomeon - March 17, 2009 5:52 p.m.

    Salazar was one of my favorites. I loved how he wasn't some big, looming badass like the chief (Or "Centipede man", as I like to call him.) Or wesker, but just a small, humble person. I also loved how he seemed human when we was cut in the hand with leon's knife in the cinimatic a bit before the final battle with him.
  • Awesomeitude1523 - March 3, 2009 6:07 p.m.

    It was sooooo much fun to finally kill Sander Cohen in his apartment, and then just stand there smacking his corpse with a wrench for half an hour. Crazy old fool.
  • KillerPotato - June 4, 2009 6:04 p.m.

    Laser crotches and hitler in a mech suit, the making of a great article
  • ryno - June 23, 2009 8:29 p.m.

    why the F@&k isnt the joker from batman on this list
  • Basketcase676 - November 17, 2008 5:39 p.m.

    Haha, good read! And of course Salazar had to make an appearance, too much flambouancy for a bad guy.
  • misfit119 - November 17, 2008 7:51 p.m.

    Enfants Terrible was what it was called in MGS1. It didn't have to make sense, it was written by Kojima. Not a lick of Metal Gear Solid makes sense, the fan created rambles make more sense. Oh and I want to eat Kojima's face off for that whole dominant, non-dominant gene crap. Nothing will ever top Kefka for over the top bad guys. I'd pick him over Girlieroth any time. I like my bad guys homicidal, not all emo and whiney, like you get from most JRPGs.
  • GR_DavidHoughton - November 17, 2008 10:09 p.m.

    Hunter2458: Yikes. Well pointed out. Post-credits dialogue acknowledged. Don't know how that one slipped through. I'll put it down to it being Monday. Edit made.
  • GamesRadarMikelReparaz - November 17, 2008 10:10 p.m.

    I'd also suggest this one: http://static.gamesradar.com/images/mb/GamesRadar/us/Games/S/Samurai%20Champloo/Bulk%20Viewers/samuraichamploo11--screenshot.jpg But that's just me. (Link doesn't work, just copy and paste)
  • GR_DavidHoughton - November 17, 2008 10:26 p.m.

    I don't quite know how I feel about that image, Mikel. But I don't think I want to look at it any more.
  • Johnny6Gun - November 17, 2008 11:32 p.m.

    Good call on Alfred Ashford. I was going to suggest him after seeing Salazar on here, but you already had him as a #1 runner up. Well played!
  • Amnesiac - November 18, 2008 3:13 a.m.

    Yeah, I'm with most everyone else here, the first person I thought of when I saw the headline was Kefka. Love that YouTube cosplay video by the way. Also, the line about the two Narcisusses having sex in a room full of mirrors made me lawl hardly.
  • Defguru7777 - November 18, 2008 3:32 a.m.

    Pansies. Salazar's head is above my mantle. Guffaw.
  • Ravenbom - November 18, 2008 6:58 a.m.

    Yeah, Kefka was my first thought for number one. I wasn't sure if he was going to make it, since his 16 bit camp is hard to quantify out of context nowadays. But I'm happy he made it! He's definitely my number one camp bad guy. Also, I'm more than mildly disturbed by that CJ Collins video.
  • coffeenebula - November 18, 2008 5:40 p.m.

    What about the Director of H.A.R.M. in No One Lives Forever 2? He and the mime king deserve at least an honorable mention!
  • CandiedJester - November 22, 2008 3:16 a.m.

    o: How did I not know about this Kefka character? He seems frickin awesome. He does act like the Joker too. I think Im in love >///< lol That dude was a good cosplayer. Haha. MAMMA'S BOY! Best thing ever XD The only ones I knew were Sander Cohen and that twurp from RE.
  • Schuultz - November 23, 2008 12:33 a.m.

    I want David Houghton on the Podcast - if necessary via skype or whatever
  • Gameward-Bound - November 24, 2008 3:38 a.m.

    hey, what about that clown guy from devil may cry 3? or was he not a bad guy?
  • chrisat928 - November 17, 2008 5:36 p.m.

    How did I know Kefka would be number one? Awesome article.

Showing 1-20 of 39 comments

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