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The Top 7... Births in video games

There aren't many things that everyone in the world goes through in life. Being born is one of those things. But, strangely, this most natural of bodily functions is very rarely tackled in video games. Maybe it's because babies come from a part of a lady that you just can't show in a game (unless you're rendering character statues in Resident Evil 5, apparently). Or maybe there just aren't enough virtual clean towels and hot water to go around.

So, clearly, when a game does tackle this subject, it's almost always memorable. So here are our Top 7 births in gaming. Starting with…

 

7. Fallout 3

Bright white light, cold, pain… and that's just us leaving the house in the morning. This scene from Fallout 3, however, is particularly clever. Not only does it start the game from an unusual point of view, it gives you a believable character edit system as you're shown what you will look like in a couple of decades' time.


Above: What, so I'm going to look like that? Isn't there anything you can do? Doctor? 

Seeing the game from a child's perspective is a neat idea, and one that hasn't been overdone (so far). Of course everyone loves to copy good ideas, so expect to be 'born' in Metal Gear 6, Final Fantasy XV and Gran Turismo 6 in the near future.


Above: What Gran Turismo would be like if you had to choose your driving preferences at birth

Fallout 3's birth may be relatively realistic (and one tinged with tragedy as you'll see from the video below), but it's not the most realistic on this list, which is why it's so far down the order. Also, no baby would leave blood spatters on its eyes without blinking, so that's a bit weird. And the acting is pretty poor. The man's just had a baby and lost his wife, yet still speaks in the same soothing monotone. Well, he is gaming's most indestructible dad, so who are we to judge?

 

6. Pokemon

Hatching from an egg is every bit as 'being born' as the other method. You just grow on the outside instead of the inside, that's all. Of course, nobody has ever seen a Pokemon egg actually being laid, so they could just appear out of nowhere without any Poke-reation going down.

But why does it make the list over any other egg hatching in a game? Because the birth of your first manufactured Pokemon is a wonderful moment. You've left a compatible male and female Pokemon at the Day Care Center, gone off to do other things, collected the mysterious egg, then walked with it for hours (or ridden your bike round aimlessly for a few minutes). Suddenly... out it comes.

As for me, well I was lucky enough to start Pokemon Platinum with a female Piplup, which is apparently about 1 in 8 chance rare. So as soon as I could, I set about creating an army of Piplups. It was awesome. And yes, every time one was born, it made me happy inside.


Above: Artist's impression of the contents of my copy of Pokemon Platinum. Piplup FTW

I can only imagine the wonderment of hatching a Shiny Piplup... but that's something this YouTube user did:



 

Topics

Top 7

36 comments

  • StrayGator - August 2, 2010 1:13 p.m.

    What, no Viva Pinata?
  • 8bitBaby - August 2, 2010 1:31 p.m.

    that was a roller coaster ride of hilarity and horror.
  • Hurricrane - August 2, 2010 1:43 p.m.

    oh man, Overkill's scene was so disgusting... thanks for making me remember that Mr. Towell
  • Tomsta666 - August 2, 2010 1:43 p.m.

    Not in a specific game, but article related. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uswvZul1Z2s Life is short, Play More!
  • mEgAzD - August 2, 2010 2:09 p.m.

    Thank you for reminding me how weird that ending was.
  • Doctalen - August 2, 2010 2:25 p.m.

    Why not Broodmothers from Dragon Age? You first need to eat darkspawn flesh, then maybe some human (or whatever race broodmother is), then get casually raped by said darkspawn. Grow a couple more nipples and guess what? You are not a proud mother of some darkspawn.
  • mahabat - August 2, 2010 2:26 p.m.

    haha the black guy sounds just like doakes in dexter haha
  • Doctalen - August 2, 2010 2:26 p.m.

    now*
  • alexkirk - August 2, 2010 2:30 p.m.

    Family Guy should be number one! That level is hilarious! The weird thing, I was playing that game a couple days ago :)
  • cj12297 - August 2, 2010 2:31 p.m.

    i remember that bit in family guy
  • AnonymouZ - August 2, 2010 3:14 p.m.

    i had forgotten the back to the womb part of gaming. thanks a lot for reminding me of it. other than that, oh the LULS.
  • Mumb00 - August 2, 2010 4:22 p.m.

    Remember Black & White? You would have 2 people, obviously of opposing genders, that you would pair as Breeder Disciples. They would stand in place kissing, fully-clothed, and moments later, a fully-clothed, walking, talking, ready-for-school kid would appear between them and then the 3 of them walk away in seperate directions attending to whatever business they thought appropriate.
  • CH3BURASHKA - August 2, 2010 4:25 p.m.

    Even the mention of Dante's Inferno leaves a bad taste in my mouth, and the idea that there's a sequel being made even more so. Ugh.
  • PipGirl - August 2, 2010 4:35 p.m.

    Haha. The guys faces on The House of the Dead.......Priceless.
  • FETALJUICE - August 2, 2010 4:39 p.m.

    That Overkill ending made me laugh my ass off. How the hell did Sega manage to get away with all of that? lol
  • Silvermech - August 2, 2010 5:24 p.m.

    I don't get it, what makes that Piplup shiny? Is it that little star at the side?
  • John_Romero - August 2, 2010 5:28 p.m.

    Lego Star Wars had a pretty funny birth scene.
  • Thuperman - August 2, 2010 6:33 p.m.

    Hahaha well that was a fun article to read
  • ice_sneasel - August 2, 2010 6:48 p.m.

    for pokemon you should have had the aceus event from hg/ss when arceus lays an egg of giritina, dialga, or palkia
  • R3DRUN - August 2, 2010 7:43 p.m.

    The House of the Dead: Overkill ending was a dude with Oedipus Complex unbirthing himself in his giant zombie mother's womb... not to complicated to understand. (*que the vomit sound effect)

Showing 1-20 of 36 comments

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