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The Top 7... Annoying nags that need to STFU

This is a game that you can only get good at by playing over and over and over. And - as if the frustrating nature of the actual game isn't enough to put gristle up your chuffer - the Director's constant nagging will definitely push any man to breaking point. Instructions. Orders. Commands. It's fine for the first couple of goes. It's almost useful. But when you know what you have to do, but just can't do it, his incessant bossing quickly leads to extreme enragement.

U-Turn. Drift left. Drift right. Pass close to the cars. Through the gap. Scrape the vehicle. Hard left. Hard right. Smash the shack. Jump and hit the railing. Hit the boxes. Hit the ramp. Jump through the gap. Hit the action button. Follow the lead vehicle. Pass close to the explosion. Overtake left. Overtake right. Pop a wheelie. Break through the gate. Hit the jump. Yadda. Yadda. Yadda. It's like actual mental torture.

And when you inevitably fail miserably by driving into a river, the Director offers some smarmy, condescending comment like "Where are you going?" Seriously, if he was an actual real person we'd definitely take him down to China Town. What a loud-mouthed cock rod.

March 30, 2009

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86 comments

  • gamefreakl1996 - July 22, 2010 8:55 p.m.

    ahem, KAEPORA GAEBORA KAEPORA GAEBORA KAEPORA GAEBORA KAEPORA GAEBORA KAEPORA GAEBORA KAEPORA GAEBORA KAEPORA GAEBORA KAEPORA GAEBORA KAEPORA GAEBORA KAEPORA GAEBORA KAEPORA GAEBORA KAEPORA GAEBORA KAEPORA GAEBORA KAEPORA GAEBORA KAEPORA GAEBORA KAEPORA GAEBORA KAEPORA GAEBORA KAEPORA GAEBORA KAEPORA GAEBORA KAEPORA GAEBORA KAEPORA GAEBORA KAEPORA GAEBORA KAEPORA GAEBORA KAEPORA GAEBORA KAEPORA GAEBORA KAEPORA GAEBORA KAEPORA GAEBORA KAEPORA GAEBORA
  • iDeza - January 3, 2010 9:23 a.m.

    oh yeah michelle was soooooooo annoying i had to literally kill her to get her to shut the hell up
  • Spritle101 - November 23, 2009 6:20 a.m.

    Lol, these are great.
  • Vader999 - November 22, 2009 2:44 a.m.

    Honorable mention to Juno Eclipse and Cortana. They were hot, but they were also sometimes annoying.
  • HackMaxx - November 7, 2009 11:14 p.m.

    The Aussie girl in Mercenaries 2 who clearly has no long term memory given the repetitive 'advice' I heard every 3 minutes or so should have been included, if she has to talk I'd much rather hear about ways to avoid the gamebreaking glitches *sigh* and I used to love the Australian accent.
  • nyuh - July 12, 2009 9:07 a.m.

    GLADOS ISN'T ON THERE?????
  • Remake - July 5, 2009 9:22 p.m.

    The Dead Rising one completely made my day. PS: 'moistest' showed up in my antispam message. Now I have to look that up in the dictionary. Thanx >.>
  • Murcielago - June 1, 2009 2:23 a.m.

    Aaaaahahaha totally agree on Stuntman the director shits me off sooooo effing much...Love the game though.
  • Danomeon - April 26, 2009 9:28 p.m.

    Navi? HEY! LISTEN!
  • Sinsational - April 15, 2009 2:27 p.m.

    Though I haven't played most of these games, I totally understand the MGS2 one.
  • Assassin4than - April 11, 2009 2:23 p.m.

    Every character in Animal Crossing but especially Resetti and insurance guy. an also when the animals run upto you all excited and want to talk but ur already talking to someone and they wont shut up and u want to see why the other ones so excited incase theyll give you theyre photograph. but by the time youre done they got sad and walked away.
  • bamit11 - April 6, 2009 8:47 p.m.

    how was ashley from RE4 not in this!! every five seconds it's LEON!! HELP!!! i sometimes killed her she was so annoying
  • sofaku - April 4, 2009 5:25 p.m.

    i cant belive navi isnt on there
  • Grand1nquisitor - April 4, 2009 3:48 p.m.

    I agree with Brett about RE 5 and 4 for that matter. The unlockables and level-up weapons make it irresistible to play through again and again.
  • EmmaXII - April 3, 2009 6:28 p.m.

    Wot the crap!!! Am. .. . Wot about Navi!!! She SUCKS!! "HEY LISTEN!" And wen u fite gannon shes all like, "Link!, i can't help u" wen she duznt seem 2 be tryin very very hard.
  • Phantasmagorical - April 3, 2009 3:55 p.m.

    Awesome, awesome article! XD God, I hated Kendra. >:[
  • izayuh - April 3, 2009 2:17 p.m.

    i agree about the michelle one because i swear she called me the most out of any the girls i dated
  • Spybreak8 - April 3, 2009 3:28 a.m.

    When someone told me I could answer the people's calls in GTAIV and then cancel the plans without them getting ticked off my world changed. GTAIV was not as bad as other people had to go with and they should have had that in the manual haha. As for dead rising, Zman I agree 100%.
  • wiisixty - April 2, 2009 10:57 p.m.

    hilarious feature
  • gmilf71 - April 1, 2009 6:02 a.m.

    yes! mgs2 was soooo anoying! but what about clank in Rachet: deadlocked? he'd say stuff like: Rachet, there's 5 robots in front of you shooting at you. can you see them?

Showing 1-20 of 86 comments

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