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The sexiest sprites of all time

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If you're reading GamesRadar, chances are good that you're here for lists featuring sexy videogame women. Congratulations, you are doing the Internet properly! Now, we've done all sorts of sexy articles, and as graphics strive to be more and more realistic, we have sexier and sexier things to talk about. It wasn't always this way, however. Think back to the era of the humble sprite.


Above: HAWT 

Sprites have been with us since the earliest days of gaming and still exist in many portable, digital or niche titles today. They've gotten prettier over the years, but nobody looks to them as a source of sleazy sexual gratification. Well, that changes now! Come with us as we celebrate the forgotten girls of gaming, and take a peek at some of the sexiest sprites of all time.


Blaze

Streets of Rage is a fantastic game and if you disagree then you're a terrible human being. Asskicking heroine Blaze never gets her due when it comes to appreciation of the digital female form, but she's a 16-bit stunner that deserves some recognition. She might not have a much of a face to speak of, but she does have a short skirt and can German suplex punks like they were made out of rice paper. That's got to count for something.

Blaze, like the other Streets of Rage players, never really caught on and while the game remains a fondly remembered classic, nobody's going to put this girl on their list of favorite videogame characters. Nevertheless, Blaze was a woman of her era, and one of the sexiest sprites ever.


Cammy

An obvious pick, Cammy may have received some visual upgrades over the years, gaining a third dimension and cutting down on the pixelation, but her original sprite is still one of the hottest. You won't catch me disagreeing that Chun-Li has her charms, and maybe it's just my Colonial bias speaking, but Cammy's always been the star in this writer's eyes.

Plus, as tempting as Chun-Li's thunderthighs are, Cammy's the one with the big arse hanging out of her leotard, and that's what scores points here. Everyone knows that it's the amount of flesh that matters, not the actual attractiveness or the girl or that mythical "personality" thing women are supposed to have.


The Dark Queen

I imagine that many 20-30 year-olds currently found in the BDSM community can trace their whip n' leather fantasies right back to the NES and Battletoads. It would be safe to wager that the Dark Queen awakened more than a few dark interests in the hearts and minds of young gamers, sowing a kinky seed that would sprout into an oak tree of carpet burns and thumbscrews once they came of age.

There’s no shortage of leather-clad bad girls in videogames these days, but they all owe a little something to this enterprising villainess. She paved the way for the women of the future. Like a suffragette ... except that comparison is grossly inappropriate.


Samus Aran

Yes, yes, yes, it was a big surprise when we all found out Samus was a woman, blah blah blah. Forget about all that though, BECAUSE THAT SPRITE ALMOST LOOKS LIKE IT'S WEARING A BIKINI A BIT IF YOU SQUINT YOUR EYES FAP FAP FAP!

Samus has gone from strength to strength since this early collection of pixels, but I bet you really could masturbate over this if you tried really, really hard. In fact, I'd go as far as to say that somebody's already done it. Multiple times. Then killed somebody's dog.

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44 comments

  • igothitwithabulb - March 7, 2011 6:51 a.m.

    I may be wrong, but don't you see Peach in 8-4, not 1-4?
  • jackthemenace - March 4, 2011 5:02 p.m.

    Oh yeah. Had a cosplay of Cammy with her arse out as my background for like a week. I've never played, or even SEEN Darkstalkers anywhere, but Morrigan is HAWT. And lastly, Etna. I loved Disgaea, and Laharls weakness to big boobs was so funny, Etna has to be my favourite off this list.
  • nicolaslara - March 4, 2011 3:21 p.m.

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  • DIStroyinmasses - March 4, 2011 12:38 p.m.

    I know is sad to fancy a computer game character but TIFA! thanks to ebay for suplying my girlfriend with a Tifa cosplay costume :P
  • lovinmyps3 - March 3, 2011 11:40 p.m.

    Morrigan is a babe! Even the sprite is sexy! *fapfapfap*
  • Voodoowolfe - March 3, 2011 8:43 p.m.

    Cammy was my first vid-game crush. I loved to play her and win. Just so, oh wait here it comes...bingo ass with a turn around smile! Nothing says I love you more.
  • Ravenbom - March 3, 2011 8:32 p.m.

    Oh Mr Sterling! How right you are! Still, Tyrus is at the top of my list, if only because she was the first girl to battle with my heart strings in a bikini.
  • CoppertopJohnson - March 3, 2011 5:57 p.m.

    I always preferred Chun-Li to Cammy because she had some meat on her bones, but that's just me. Morrigan was spot on, though.
  • Sevej - March 3, 2011 4:32 p.m.

    I *always* play using Blaze...
  • Rascanuvols - March 3, 2011 3:27 p.m.

    @jmcgrotty Litchi IS an sprite :/
  • FanofSaiyan - March 3, 2011 2:43 p.m.

    No honorable mentions? I think Orchid from Killer Instinct deserves a shoutout!
  • monkeyrevenge - March 3, 2011 12:59 p.m.

    WHAT?!?! No katt? Let me remind you. http://sdb.drshnaps.com/display.php?object=7502
  • jmcgrotty - March 3, 2011 8:58 a.m.

    Some of you people suggesting alternate people (Litchi, Zero Suit Samus, Street Fighter 3 I guess technically would be sprites, but I would say they are not in the spirit of this list, the reason Felicia wasn't added was addressed in the article) need to buy a dictionary and/or learn the difference between a sprite and a polygon. It isn't just a list of hot video game chars. Jungle Jill was an overlooked one, though, I agree.
  • Rascanuvols - March 3, 2011 8:48 a.m.

    @S135 Yup. at the very least, Litchi should be here. Also, Etna looks 11 years old.
  • Snowyjoe - March 3, 2011 7:27 a.m.

    Etna used her Sexy Attack!!! Prinny was out of range!
  • FauxFurry - March 3, 2011 7:17 a.m.

    No Kongiku from Murumasa:the Demon Blade or Poison from Final Fight/Street Fighter 3 or even Alex from Street Fighter 3 or Jimmy Lee from Double Dragon (HD)? For shame, Sterling. For shame. Other than that, the article was journalism at its finest.
  • GayforGilbert - March 3, 2011 6:34 a.m.

    BoneRadar. >________________>
  • funster - March 3, 2011 5:46 a.m.

    Fantastic fan-fictitious factoids fine fellow. Especially loved the part about boobs x 50... milk.
  • Spybreak8 - March 3, 2011 5:24 a.m.

    @Ampatent Yeah I was thinking the same thing but my gif looks different. AH can't find it atm.
  • CrazySmurf - March 3, 2011 4:27 a.m.

    You gotta love sprites. Even if they might not look as good as some real women, they don't mind if you stare at them for hours. Much unlike the real thing. While I'm not even close to the topic, who else is against restraining orders?

Showing 1-20 of 44 comments

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