The N bomb!

No one likes a noob. Here are five easy steps to avoid the ire of the internet

Words: on November 29, 2007
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Nov 29, 2007

noob
Pronunciation: \nüb\
Function: noun
1: A longtime member of a community who is disliked and bothers others with ignorant and rude behavior
2: Someone who reads (or writes) an article about how to not be a noob

Elitism has a way of rearing its ugly head wherever people gather. It seems we can’t resist creating a hierarchy of leaders, followers, those who are cool, and those who just plain suck. Online gaming is no exception, and at the bottom of the food chain lies the lowliest of the low, the dreaded noob. Not to be confused with newbies - whose ignorance may be attributed to them being new to any given game or online community - noobs have been around long enough to know better, and shoulder the brunt of the internet’s unlimited hatred.



Above: A newbie is someone who may not know what’s going on simply because they’re new. A noob is someone who’s been around long enough to know better

Being labeled as a noob can result in symptoms ranging from feelings of intense rejection, utter indignation and downright hurl-yourself-under-a-passing-bus humiliation. And you don't want that. So, read on and find out how to never be labeled as an online gaming noob again.

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Platforms:

Xbox 360, PS3, PS2, Wii, PC, PSP, DS, Xbox, GameCube

14 Comments
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  • The_Lurcher

    The_Lurcher  - 3 years, 5 months ago  - Report

    wow great article i've never been called a noob just a haxor and a fag and the wigga and a piece of shit ive also been told to go and kill myself and i've been threatened by several people oh isnt the world of xbox live briliant!
    Reply
  • Herschal

    Herschal  - 3 years, 5 months ago  - Report

    Lollin article

    P.S. Nitemarsh f*ck off and learn how to type.
    Reply
  • pinoklin

    pinoklin  - 3 years, 5 months ago  - Report

    good article good article.....lol ive never benn noobed in wow
    Reply
  • iluvmyDS

    iluvmyDS  - 3 years, 5 months ago  - Report

    This is why I always play matches in games with my friends.
    Reply
  • MW3M

    MW3M  - 3 years, 5 months ago  - Report

    I think I've sorta sidestepped all this n00b stuff.

    Thank God for Xbox Live, where all I get is ridiculed for being referring to jelly as jam and being called a fag amongst many other racial slurs by drunken American fratboys...
    Reply
  • hardcore_gamer1990

    hardcore_gamer1990  - 3 years, 3 months ago  - Report

    Ive been called n00b because i'm not serious enough in games.

    HAZE, online, i trigger explosions for no reason, other than its funny to watch the opposing troopers scarper when they see a shockwave appear from the floor.

    Does that make me a n00b?
    Reply
  • xz03yx

    xz03yx  - 3 years, 4 months ago  - Report

    i have never been called a noob....just a big fat lesbian who shouldnt be allowed to play xbox until i have finished the ironing...ah well
    Reply
  • NelosAngelos

    NelosAngelos  - 3 years, 4 months ago  - Report

    I love noobs, they are great fun to make them so angry that they resort to yelling at you through the headset until their voice goes hoarse. Noobs were put on this planet to not only hinder us, but for our enjoyment (at leas that's how I think of it.)
    Reply
  • RaIdEn

    RaIdEn  - 3 years, 4 months ago  - Report

    there are some crazy people online. one time somebody told me 2 kill myself because i kept dying. lol
    Reply
  • dkingiv

    dkingiv  - 3 years, 4 months ago  - Report

    oh, The_Lurcher, it is. Just happy little community of rascist Frat boys and 8-year olds. So rarely do you find a not-jerk on XBL.
    P.S. I agree, Herschal. Nitemarish needs to stop bein a noob. XD
    Reply
  • Nitemarish

    Nitemarish  - 3 years, 5 months ago  - Report

    this articul sux learn 2 write engagign topix
    Reply
  • ccm117

    ccm117  - 3 years, 5 months ago  - Report

    lol this article is so true. 8-yr. old halo players are the number one threat to america. I've been sworn at by 8 yr. olds too many time to count.
    Reply
  • thejanitor44

    thejanitor44  - 3 years, 5 months ago  - Report

    I've met so many noobs in my lifetime its just a shame
    Reply
  • dkingiv

    dkingiv  - 3 years, 5 months ago  - Report

    don't forget the 8 year olds!
    Reply
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