Nate Cooper (rubber-faced Joel Moore) is a loveless, 20-something doofus who decides to turn his life around by tracking down his first-grade crush and living happily ever after. Said crush turns out to be lip-gloss abuser Paris Hilton, who won’t date Nate until he finds a boyfriend for her hideous, acne-ridden gal-pal June (the positively un-hideous Christine Lakin, in Halloween make-up). Can you figure out what happens next? In truth, for all the invective usually directed at Ms Hilton, it’s hard to get too angry about The Hottie And The Nottie – the film is simply too dumb to realise it’s being as shallow and transparent as the stereotypes it’s supposed to be skewering. If you thought She’s All That was all that, this will pass the time for you – but if you thought She’s All That was all that, well, so would practically any film.