The 7 least-scary moments in scary games

2. Clock Tower 3 (PS2) - Scissorman and Scissorwoman
Imagine this: You're a frightened, fragile teenage girl who's been kidnapped by supernatural forces you don't understand and thrown into the past to confront dead serial killers. You've so far evaded, faced down and destroyed a lumbering man-hulk with an executioner's hood and a sledgehammer; a maniac in a gasmask who hunted you with a hose full of acid; and a shirtless Marilyn Manson lookalike with a hatchet.

Now think: what's the scariest thing that could top off that experience? Whatever it is, it sure as hell isn't this:

So Clock Tower 3's most horrific killers are a pair of acrobatic samurai-harlequins with no pants on? Maybe goth makeup and high-pitched voices trigger some deep, primal fear in the Japanese psyche. We couldn't say. Whatever the case, we couldn't bring ourselves to be afraid of these two Dynasty Warriors rejects, no matter how hard we tried.

Considering that these preening clods are followed up by a giant, foppish musketeer of a final boss, Clock Tower 3 stands out more than any other game not only for having shot its scare wad too early, but also for having no idea how to clean up afterward.

But its sins are still minor compared to what comes next.


  • Pocotron - September 5, 2011 10:33 a.m.

    Did I just find the beginning of the internet?
  • jessicasmiley - November 19, 2010 4:23 a.m.

    "I was weak. That's why I needed you...Needed someone to punish me for my sins..." —James Sunderland, Silent Hill 2, The pyramids are a version of James meant to punish him for the murder of his wife. when James finally admits to himself what he did to her he doesn't need that constant reminder because he has accepted what he did and what he is in Silent Hill for! Thats why they kill themselves. sorry it wasnt an epic battle but it was meant to be symbolic of him taking responsibility.
  • seniorpain - October 26, 2008 9:18 a.m.

    this is the first comment
  • Narudude360 - June 26, 2009 9:13 p.m.

    Numb Bodies scared me because of the fear of that clammy gross skin coming into contact with mine. *Shudder*
  • misfit119 - March 12, 2009 10:26 p.m.

    So the jesters were the ones that killed it for you? It wasn't the fact that the two teenage leads acted like such idiots that if they had died, instead of the bad guys, it would definitely have been worth cheering about?
  • AA95mp - December 13, 2008 5:21 p.m.

    why did they add the numb bodies?

Showing 1-6 of 6 comments

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