SFX Spurious Awards

Dodgy toilets, scary film screenings, Galactica imitation, Marvel/ Tron crossovers and loads more

POLITEST GRAFITTI ARTISTS OF THE WEEK

Congratulations to Detective Scanlon in Medium for discovering the only grafitti-encrusted public toilet on the entire planet without a single “f**k”, “t**t”, cock and balls or phone number for Busty Betty’s personal services on the walls.

MOST INSPIRED FILM SCREENING ANNOUNCEMENT OF THE WEEK

Fancy seeing John Landis’s timeless horror classic American Werewolf in what can only be described as a unique location? As part of its See Film Differently campaign Volkswagen will be screening the film next Sunday 31 October in London Zoo. Inspired! And not just because they can call the event An American Werewolf In London Zoo , but because, you may recall, werewolf Dave actually wakes up in the zoo at one point. How freaky is that going to be? Watching American Werewolf in one of the locations where it takes place on Halloween night ? Thank god it’s not a full moon as well. You have to wonder what VW will do as an encore. Waterworld in the London Aquarium? Jacob’s Ladder in Royal Holloway Sanatorium? 2001 on the Moon? If you’re interested, tickets for the event are free and courtesy of Volkswagen through an online ticket draw. For a chance to win tickets, log on to www.seefilmdifferently.com , and follow the event instructions. Those lucky enough to attend will enjoy luxury seating and cinema food, and settle into this premium movie experience right in the heart of the zoo. Silver bullets will be confiscated at the entrance.

MOST CREATIVE USE OF JELLY BEANS OF THE WEEK

Well, nobody ever eats the black ones, so you might as well use ’em for something.

BEST HUG OF THE WEEK

Was it just us, or did anyone else find the supposedly gawky and gauche princess in Merlin impossibly cute?

COPYCAT OF THE WEEK

The similarities between Battlestar Galactica and the fantastic SGU have been comprehensively covered elsewhere, but is it us or is Rush becoming more and more like Gaius Baltar every week? Though admittedly less whiny and 100% more Scottish, Rush is not only the genius black sheep of the Destiny who frequently gets on the wrong side of the captain, but he’s recently started having Caprica Six-esque visions of his wife and his dead ship-mate Brody. It’s a little close to the mark if you ask us, but we can forgive them if the visions are actually explained (we’re looking at you Ron D Moore…). Oh, and while we’re on the subject of SGU , would somebody on that ship please put some money in the electric meter and switch the bloody lights on?

MOST BIZARRE CHRISTMAS DECORATION OF THE WEEK

Somebody’s stock of Boba Fett And Carbon-Frozen Han Solo statues was clearly not selling quickly enough. So they’ve painted Fett’s gun, tied a bow round Han and cunningly remarketed it as a Christmas decoration . Or at least, we think that’s what must have happened…

GENEALOGY OF THE WEEK
A geek is not just a geek by any other name any more. Social media marketing website Flowtown proves that to the marketing business, we’re just as breakdownable into targettable subsects for advertising purposes as anyone else. Quick, repeat the mantra, “I will not be pushed, filed, stamped, indexed, briefed, debriefed or numbered,” before they force you to buy Twilight on Blu-ray or something.

GIMMICK OF THE WEEK
Okay, okay, we’ve just had a moan about marketing and now we’re going to be completely hypocritical and worship at the feet of the great marketing gods, but come on, these special Marvel superhero comic covers promoting Tron Legacy are just so damned cool… (well, apart from the Wolverine one, which is a bit knob – what’s going on with his claws?).

GRATUITOUS SPURIOUS AWARD OF THE WEEK
Did you know they’ve launched an R2D2 swimsuit?