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RPG Emo-Off


Games: Kingdom Hearts & Tales of Vesperia

Yes, villains can be emo too, usually driven to cloak-wearing lunacy by the very thing that made them evil.  But which white-haired, effeminate megalomaniac is the most pitiable?

*Note: We’re going with “Ansem” because it would take a freaking Power Point presentation to explain why he’s not really Ansem. And by the time he drops the act in Kingdom Hearts II, he stops being emo and starts being just plain crazy.

 

 

Ansem

Above: Sora’s too young to know emo when he sees it.

Duke

Above: Insert sigh here.

The Winner: Ansem - he doesn’t sell out to the good guys’ namby-pamby feel-good assertions in the last fifteen minutes of the game.


Games: Eternal Sonata & Final Fantasy X-2

Love and the lack thereof is the number one cause of emo among JRPG twenty-somethings. Be sure to protect yourself by 1) never falling in love, 2) falling in love with someone who’s already in love with you and 3) dying before your lover does so you don’t have to stick around and be sad about it. 

 

 

 

Falsetto

Above: “Why did you have to die?!”

Shuyin

Above: “But… I couldn’t save you.”

The Winner: Shuyin – because Falsetto gets over it.

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51 comments

  • officercake - January 23, 2009 7:07 p.m.

    hmm Cloud is pretty Emo :P But i dont think that ansem should've been put in since he wasnt Emo he was just a bad guy with some twisted plans
  • Sunku - February 5, 2009 8:33 a.m.

    really im sorry i really wish i would have joined this shit sooner because you guys really need to learn what emo is because neither of these games can be considered emo first of all you need shit that makes a game and love is something people can relate to and even when their is decension in the game their has to be something that keeps the game interesting and all you can focus on is the emoness of a video game please spend more time playing the game then ocusing on the parts that relate to your life.... get out and experience life because these games are made to give you an experience and not to be emo but maybe to admit something that everyone feels and wish they could change but cant so get off the emo kick and go play the danm game fully
  • jakery22 - May 20, 2009 7:41 p.m.

    I do find this slightly offensive as i am an emo and just because you have long hair and wear trench coats and always feel down that doesnt make you and emo. I know people who have long hair and are always sad but arent emo, they are actually more of a chav than an emo. And by the way not all emo's cut themselves. You dont have to cut yourself to be an emo. I never used to cut myself. (Until something bad happened and i got really depressed). I have to say this is one of the only articles on GR that i dont like >:(
  • Baconator96 - May 19, 2009 4:06 a.m.

    you just dont understand!
  • Skellington - October 15, 2008 9:19 p.m.

    YAY FIRST EMO-NES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! emoemoemoemo
  • Z-man427 - October 15, 2008 11 p.m.

    and emo protagonists matter because?
  • iluvmyDS - October 15, 2008 11:08 p.m.

    My friend doesn't like this article. Then again he's a rabid FF7 fanboy.
  • octagons - October 16, 2008 12:44 a.m.

    I really hate it when characters are supposed to be mature but they are really just emo. the same goes for game plots.
  • lava_lamp - October 16, 2008 12:45 a.m.

    emo kids and rpgs two of the worst things ever
  • Christrigg1 - October 16, 2008 1:05 a.m.

    emo supremo ftw! im not emo, i just felt like saying that. it sounds like a great burger king burger. "ill have the emo supremo with a side of fries and adr. pepper" awesome..... NICE VID GR!!!
  • Christrigg1 - October 16, 2008 1:07 a.m.

    well, not a vid, but its a great report for sure. awesome!
  • jonathan13k - October 16, 2008 1:24 a.m.

    im emo
  • BlackKraken - October 16, 2008 2:03 a.m.

    Whats actually the difference between being depressed and being an emo?
  • Weasel - October 16, 2008 3:22 a.m.

    Maybe that's why these games always feel unfinished somehow, they're so emo they cut themselves *ducks*
  • Comatose92 - October 16, 2008 3:06 p.m.

    lol, "and the winner is... Clou-! Wait, scratch that. Genesis!" Cloud: "WTF?"
  • KHfan - October 16, 2008 4:35 p.m.

    isent aerith zacks girlfrind and cload has tifa and yea, neku should be on here
  • BuggattiFreak - October 17, 2008 12:25 a.m.

    Must kill the emo's.
  • Mistwalkers - October 17, 2008 7:43 a.m.

    Eh, imo Vincent is most emo lol, no disrespect to 'em (fav character) but i still think he's emo but he don't know it xD
  • Thequestion 121 - October 17, 2008 8:57 p.m.

    Great article, guys!
  • Hammy_94_ - October 17, 2008 9:18 p.m.

    lol is it emo to consider having my name as KidVSTheWorld? and great article, GR. I think the main character should have won HE HAS DEATH INSIDE HIM FOR CHRISSAKES!!

Showing 1-20 of 51 comments

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