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Real gamers review the iPad

RESIDENT EVIL 4

Chris: Let's ignore the fact that Resident Evil 4 fans have had numerous chances to pick up the game already. Let's also ignore that everything that dates RE4 - the inability to run and shoot - is the only thing that makes it adaptable to iPad. Even the port to Wii had control and graphical benefits.

Charlie: Yes, a port to Wii made sense. You could point your Wiimote and shoot instantly - intuitively - anywhere on the screen. That should be possible on the iPad, too... I should be able to tap the screen where I want to shoot. I should be lining up zombie headshots with incredible ease. Instead, I have to tap on little up, down, left and right arrows in the corner of the screen to shift Leon's aim... so what's the point?

Chris: What doesn't make sense is the antiquated gameplay on top of the antiquated graphics. I caught a wonderful glimpse of what appears to be the fist of a zombie... from the original House of the Dead circa 1996.

Charlie: Revolutionary! The muddy brown setting also isn't the best to show off the iPad's bright, crisp screen. Playing under our fluorescent office lights, however, it is the best to show off every GamesRadar employee's sweaty, overexcited thumb prints.

Chris: Well, if you're absolutely determined to pay 40 cents less than the infintely superior Wii version, by all means.



SUPER MONKEY BALL 2

Charlie: My reaction to this was the same as my reaction to the iPhone Monkey Ball. The franchise seems absolutely, perfectly suited to a tilt-sensitive device, and yet... it just doesn't work for some reason.

The game overreacts to every movement, so that you're flying off the edge before you've even realized which direction you're supposed to be rolling. And there are plenty of edges to fly off... the developers should have created more forgiving environments for such a jumpy device. Instead this just feels like a GameCube port, only I have to keep adjusting and readjusting my television to play.

Chris: Okay, I love Monkey Ball. And although my heart soars over the idea of playing an eight year-old GameCube port, I'll let the legendary Jeff Gerstmann speak for me:

"The downside of this is that you really have to hold your Game Boy flat to play the game - which means you're hovering over your Game Boy, blocking out most overhead lighting. While it's possible to calibrate the sensor to play the game upright, it never really seems to work quite as well as when you hold your Game Boy flat."

That's from his GameSpot review of Kirby Tilt 'n' Tumble. If you substitute "Game Boy" for "iPad," it still accurately sums up my opinion on Monkey Ball for iPad, and of building your entire game platform on a novelty even Nintendo abandoned a decade ago.

Up next! We pick our favorite iPad games so far (spoiler: we still weren't that impressed.)

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39 comments

  • Uncompetative - June 2, 2013 9:05 a.m.

    You can jailbreak the iPad and use a conventional bluetooth gamepad with it, like Sony's: http://lifehacker.com/5991266/how-to-use-a-gamepad-for-any-ios-game-not-just-emulators
  • Ravenbom - April 14, 2010 7:28 p.m.

    @phoenix wings - yes, MGS Touch was a launch game with higher res graphics to fit the iPad. My buddy has it on his new iPad and it looks and plays a bit better, but I wasn't a big fan of the original. As far as the games being made for people with ADD, well duh! Most companies are treating (the iPhone, it remains to be seen how the iPad will be treated) as the platform it is: something you play while sitting around at the DMV and not a serious gaming platform. There are some good games with a lot of depth and playtime like Zenonia, Myst, and Chinatown Wars.
  • Ravenbom - April 14, 2010 7:18 p.m.

    I really hope more iPad/iPhone games take the Geometry Wars approach and make the analog sticks anywhere you place your thumbs.
  • Zepaw - April 12, 2010 12:03 p.m.

    I feel very positive about the iPad in general, but it is mostly garbage for games. It is just like the iPod Touch and iPhone, the controls are only suitable for a few genres of games. If you are looking for a gaming device don't even think twice about an iPad. while a bit of a luxury/novelty it does suit a good handful of other uses.
  • JohnnyMaverik - April 9, 2010 10:35 a.m.

    "the old and forgotten genres that gamers have, for the most part, given up on. Point-and-click adventure games seem like a natural fit" >.< WTF, NOBODY GAVE UP, THEY JUST STOPPED FKING MAKING THEM! Yea fk you lucasarts & funcom, star wars milk and mmo's my fat arse -_-
  • Kytl - April 9, 2010 12:18 a.m.

    so the only thing this thingamajig is useful for in gaming is RTS huh? well thats one of my favorite genres(even though i suck at them)but theres no way in hell i'm buying an iPad just for that
  • ZedoMann - April 8, 2010 11:17 p.m.

    Ah, the iPad. The Apple device I wasn't interested in. The iPod Touch seems like it'll be nicer for everything, especially when I just pull it out of my pocket and start gaming or whatever on it.
  • woww - April 8, 2010 12:32 a.m.

    I have to admit I hate I"whatevers" but the graphics are better than of anything else that mobile. Not to mention the screensize. It's a winner for the avarage user that does not need more than a basic browser, music/video player and an occasional portable game console.
  • Cyberninja - April 7, 2010 9:41 p.m.

    ipad sucks lets move on please.
  • db1331 - April 7, 2010 8:13 p.m.

    This thing is worse than a joke. I mean for the cost of the high end iPad you could get a 360 AND a PS3. Or you can get an iPad and pay the same or even more for a terribly stripped down port. That zombie hand made my day. I can't even remember the last time I played a game that looked that terrible. I love how IGN gave NFS: Shift on iPad a better score than Bad Company 2. Good thing I stopped valuing their reviews years ago.
  • philipshaw - April 7, 2010 12:07 p.m.

    The iPad is just an overpriced iPhone. You could buy a decent laptop for half the price and it would do more things than the iPad
  • speno93 - April 7, 2010 6:31 a.m.

    @ovenman like i said, who in the right state of mind (not insane) would buy this?
  • mgkyo666 - April 7, 2010 2:30 a.m.

    @Chris I did play Robot Unicorn Attack and I have to say..... WHY THE F#CK IS THAT GAME SO F#CKING ADDICTIVE?! I can't keep the song out of my head!!! recaptcha: came papoose (lol)
  • lukel127 - April 7, 2010 2:28 a.m.

    and THAT is why im waiting for iPad 2. Itll be better somehow, and have a larger app base.
  • D0CCON - April 7, 2010 1:27 a.m.

    And to think of all the idiots who lined up days in advance to suck Jobs's **** for one of these overpriced atrocities. Remember when all portable devices came out every three weeks and each one was smaller? Now they are all getting bigger (DSi XL ftl).
  • RebornKusabi - April 6, 2010 11:59 p.m.

    I wrote a "New Technology Report" (re: college paper) using this site's coverage of the iPad as a source, with the speculative claim of the paper being that there are many great ideas on what the iPad could do to differentiate itself from other hand-helds... too bad they've decided to go with the "Let's try to fit existing game genre's on this thing while trying to do nothing new" instead, like developers constantly do with the Wii. I have seen the specs of this thing and I honestly see "some" potential with it when it comes to gaming, however with these being it's "launch games", it doesn't serve as a good symbol of things to come. The only (ONLY) good thing here is that one of the genre's that I figured would be able adjust well to the iPad would be RTS's so at least that's come to pass ; ) Great stuff guys, very interesting!
  • WhiskeyBit - April 6, 2010 11:10 p.m.

    Our society has grown so acustomed to the "mobile, portible, speedy etc." way of thinking that we've gotten kinda carried away... It started with the invention of fast food, and has now evolved into this trash. Oh yeah, Steve Jobs is the anti-Christ.
  • hatebreeder - April 6, 2010 9:22 p.m.

    So it's just an ipod touch then?
  • phoenix_wings - April 6, 2010 8:25 p.m.

    Is Metal Gear Solid Touch going to be ported to the iPad? That was....one of the only games that I bought when I had my iPhone. It was fun, but not something that I could see myself playing for a long period of time. Pretty much all of the iGames are like that. It's like they assume everyone that buys it has a severe case of ADD. They'll plop down up to $12.99 for a game and then instantly get distracted by something else, so the games aren't even that long. Kind of like the product updates. If you get bored with your iPad, don't worry, there will be another one next year that you can buy too. 33% brighter and 10% thinner, but you'll still pay the same price.
  • GamesRadarCharlieBarratt - April 6, 2010 5:49 p.m.

    To be fair, we were only testing this as a gaming platform. You might still like the iPad if you like reading books on a bright screen, or browsing Google maps on your couch, or flipping through photos with your fingers. Of course, all those things are possible on the iPhone, too...

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