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99 comments

  • arehexes - January 23, 2014 9:18 p.m.

    I grow up playing Mario games my whole life, and I know of two different origins to how he came to Mushroom Kingdom. Both make sense yet I felt like it was off, like something didn't fit right. There was so many inconsistent things between games that one would think Nintendo just made games with no thought of a connecting story. But I think I found the theory to explain the over arcing idea of Mario. The life and adventures of our favorite Nintendo mascot Mario is really an escapist coma dream from the reality that he is a loser in the real world. He is always on a quest to "save" Princess Peach from his enemy Bowser, but what if that isn't the case? What if Peach is Mario's ex girlfriend Pauline who left him for the owner of a rival plumbing company named Barry? In Mario's desperate need to get her back he dreams of having to save a more beautiful version of his lost ex from an ugly version of his rival. It could be that Mario and Barry are good friends and Mario wants to maintain that friendship, but can't forgive him for taking his Princess from him. Which explains why Mario and Bowser would get together to play sports or hang out when Bowser isn't kidnapping Peach. Then there is Luigi who in the games is seen as a loser and pretty much a nobody, but what if it's the reverse in the real world. What if Luigi is a booming success who made something of himself while Mario was a plumber who was slowly losing the life he worked hard to build? In Mario's ideal world he envisioned Luigi to be a loser who more or less looks up to Mario, while Mario is seen as the knight in shining armor of Mushroom Kingdom. Next is Yoshi, Mario's faithful partner who always forgives him, even when killing him for an extra jump. This is in fact Mario's dog that he lost as a young child. This explains why no matter how many times you kill Yoshi he will always come back, with the same loyal faith as if nothing ever happened. It is deep down Mario's desire to see his pet once again. Which lends itself to why there are games with Baby Mario and Yoshi, it's Mario wishing for the good old adventures he would have with his dog as a child. Even farther the fact Baby Mario and Mario are together in Partner's in Time is a wish that Mario could go back and steer his younger self on a different path, a better path. Even though we know Mario as a plumber in Mushroom Kingdom, why does he have other jobs in different games? It's regret that he didn't pursue a more fulfilling career he could take pride in. Knowing that he wasted his life he did the only thing he could do, suicide. He bought some mushrooms and tried to OD, but his loving brother Luigi got him to a hospital to keep him barely alive. That's why you see Mario always needing mushrooms, it's part of his mind wishing to consume more to die. It's also why he always needs stronger "power-ups", to hopefully get the job done that the mushrooms couldn't do. Which leads to the reason why the most common enemy in the series is the mushroom like Goomba's. They represent another part of Mario's mind regretting his choice and trying to overcome it by stomping out the Goomba's. Which results with Mario in a constant battle with himself trying to get over his regret, yet consumed with desire to finish what he started. All while on a never ending quest to save his beloved Princess Peach. Also I hope you keep the Dictionary.com speech bot in the podcasts, I almost passed out laughing at the brilliant use of having it say the different words for poop.
  • dangomushi - January 23, 2014 12:05 p.m.

    QOTW: The course Dino Dino Jungle in Mario Kart: Double Dash!! (and later Mario Kart 7) is Nintendo acknowledging the existence of Diddy Kong Racing in a Mario Kart game. In Diddy Kong Racing there is a Dino Domain cup with courses featuring dinosaurs. Double Dash is the first and only Mario Kart to have Diddy Kong as a playable character, and most of the other characters have a corresponding course. Also, Dino Dino Jungle has the same background music as the DK Mountain course, which suggests a connection. It made sense to me the first time I played Double Dash, but I haven't seen any mention of this on the interweb.
  • SunniDee - January 22, 2014 7:44 p.m.

    Half-Life 3 is confirmed
  • The_Tingler - January 22, 2014 4:14 p.m.

    QOTW: One hot off the presses: Gone Home, Bioshock and System Shock take place in the same universe. For example, Katie's flight home in Gone Home was using the same airline that Jack in Bioshock did, and crashed. http://uk.ign.com/articles/2014/01/22/gone-home-and-bioshock-take-place-in-the-same-universe
  • Shelbyvillian - January 21, 2014 6:45 p.m.

    QOTW - My theory that I have held for quite some time is that the Pinatas from Viva Pinata are actually a race in the Covenant. The reason why is that when you turn on the "Grunt Birthday Party" skull (in most Halo games starting in Halo 2) and head shot a grunt confetti pops out and a sound effect plays. This is the same confetti and sound effect that plays when a Pinata is destroyed in Viva Pinata. That means that the Pinata's are part of the Covenant and that somewhere there is a planet that is breading these beasts at an alarming rate. Master Chief must get there and glass the planet before they invade any more birthday parties.
  • nightflare - January 21, 2014 4:51 p.m.

    Hey, does anyone know if you can get mp3 versions of the jingles that they do during the show?
  • Ghostwriter - January 21, 2014 10:03 a.m.

    My theory is that the Mushroom Kingdom is actually The Matrix and Mario is The One. My reasoning for this is his ability to repeatedly defy the laws of physics in numberous ways in spite of his dumpy physique. This includes how he is able to dodge bullet (bill)s. Also the downloading of information directly to his brain would explain how the plumber is able to be an expert in so many fields (racing, numerous sporting disciplines &, of course, being a doctor).
  • StrayGator - January 21, 2014 7:33 a.m.

    In Ryse: Son of Rome menu screen, press U,U,D,D,L,R,L,R,3,4,3, and an "Exit Animus" option will unlock, letting you explore modern day Brooklyn's sewage system as Marius Titus' descendant, Subject 64. True story.
  • VincentX - January 20, 2014 10:42 p.m.

    Here's my theory on the plot of Final Fantasy XIII-2: the entire story is a hallucination Lightning is experiencing because she fell into a coma right after the ending of the first game. Now here are my reasons why I believe this interpretation works: (Also please note that I am aware of the “Squall dreams FFVIII after Disc 1” theory, this is not based on that and I was not consciously thinking of that theory when I came up with this.) First: At the end of XIII Lightning just went through a very traumatic experience and also falls from a huge height. What is more plausible? That she was suddenly warped into some weird future where she becomes the champion of a Goddess that was never mentioned in the first game? Or that she fell into a coma? Second: Her younger sister Serah, who has had no combat training and is engaged to someone Lightning dislikes; is suddenly this strong badass independent woman who is barely fazed when Snow disappears and supposedly dies. Third: Serah is teamed up with a boy that Lightning sends to protect her and the two are only friends, nothing more. Noel never tries to start a relationship with Serah and is dead set on protecting her. Fourth: Every returning character is treated in a way that makes sense in terms of how Lightning saw them and related to them. Snow runs off because he's the wanna-be heroic idiot and pretty much dies because of it. Sazh, who she barely knew, is only in the story for a few minutes and only appears to help Serah. Hope, who she was the closest to; is successful, confident and even gets a semi-girlfriend (Alyssa). Finally; Fang and Vanille, the two who saved her world; are the givers of sage-like advice to Serah. Fifth: Lightning is doing what she wanted; fighting a great battle that never ends as a Goddess's Champion. This is also Goddess that has never been shown before this sequel as I cannot think of any point in FFXIII that even mentioned Etro. Sixth: The game ends and leads to something called LIGHTNING'S RETURN. It's her power fantasy; she wants to return and become the big hero. Extra: I’m sorry but Lightning gets over/gets passed Serah’s death too damn easily, though I see this more as poor character development than as a reason for the coma.
  • wadesmit - January 20, 2014 10:30 p.m.

    ............ Where the heck has Lucas been, by the way?? I miss his soothing tones.
  • GR_LucasSullivan - January 21, 2014 12:30 a.m.

    freak if I know
  • GR HollanderCooper - January 21, 2014 9:42 a.m.

    Wanna be on this week?
  • wadesmit - January 21, 2014 12:51 p.m.

    yes
  • shawksta - January 22, 2014 11:02 p.m.

    Please
  • shnazzyone - January 20, 2014 5:43 p.m.

    Okay, so I got one. Here's the theory, Donkey Kong from donkey Kong country is a HUGE ASSHOLE! Not a very large anus mind you, I mean a real freaking jerk! You may not realise it from the games but donkey kong is the King of the DK island. There's evidence, namely that he had slaves carve his face into the main mountain on the island. The other thing is DONKEY KONG RULES WITH AN IRON FIST WITH INSANE DEMANDS. His biggest and most insane demand is noone is allowed to have bananas but him. The problem with this is Bananas grow everywhere in his island. So what does he do? He makes every banana go to his Banana Hoard. What a dick! He hoards bananas in massive piles. A FRUIT THAT GOES BAD IN A WEEK! His banana hoard room must be disgusting. Here's the other thing, King K Rool... HE'S THE HERO! He is a pirate sailing the 7 seas with an army and finds an island of monkeys at various levels of anthropomorphy ruled by a dictator who keeps all of their favorite food hostage in a hole underground to rot. So he sends out all his soldiers to liberate the banana supply so the people can enjoy them. Little does K Rool realise, these people who live on this island are BRAINWASHED. They help their oppressor get his stupid rotten pile of bananas back! So what's actually happening as you play the game is Krool has scattered all the bananas all over the island for everyone to enjoy because it seems like the right thing to do. He even uses members of his own army to guard them and make sure only people who aren't donkey kong get them. Instead Donkey forces the the people(?) of his island to stay inside their houses so they aren't even tempted by HIS bananas being everywhere. Then donkey Kong, being a massive gorilla, proceeds to lay waste to the army and re hoard all his bananas until he kills the guy just trying to do the right thing. There's my game theory. Thanks long drives for giving me the inspiration I needed. TLDR:Donkey Kong from donkey Kong country is a HUGE ASSHOLE! Not a very large anus mind you, I mean a real freaking jerk!
  • DarthEnderX - January 20, 2014 5:04 p.m.

    QotW: A theory I had that I like is that Darkstalkers and Ghosts N' Goblins both take place in the same universe. Both games essentially revolved around the Makai(the demon world). They're both obviously Capcom games. So my theory was that they were actually the same connected world. Ghosts N' Goblins just takes place in the medieval times, while Darkstalkers takes place in a comparatively modern time period. So we could have Darkstalkers 4 with some kind of time travel angle and have Arthur and Firebrand as playable characters and they wouldn't even technically be guest characters then.
  • Unoriginal - January 20, 2014 3:57 p.m.

    Europeans are back in on prizes?! I am so excited I can't think of anything clever to say. So... this comment is useless.
  • TanookiMan - January 20, 2014 2:50 p.m.

    QOTW: Johnny Sasaki is a figment of Solid Snake's imagination. Snake's teeth gritted, strained voice is due to his constant constipation. He hallucinates Johnny, a character with chronic diarrhea, to deal with the pain. This also explains how Snake can always escape from Johnny (Johnny isn't real), and yet Johnny is super kick ass at other points (it's really just Snake fighting).
  • Xtapolapopotamus - January 20, 2014 2:08 p.m.

    Cooper, PLEASE keep doing the dictionary.com voice thing to punctuate like you are. I'm one of Greg's driving buddies and the amount of times the "Luftwaffe" thing from last week nearly killed me is staggering. You guys are knocking every episode out of the park. Keep doing what you guys are doing!
  • wadesmit - January 19, 2014 10:02 p.m.

    These theories in the comments should be compiled into an article.

Showing 1-20 of 99 comments

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