Remember the story we did a while back on Bruce Lee clones? We can’t get enough kung fu, so we cut together this mashup tune from the extra footage we had lying around. Here are the results, in all their ear-splitting glory. Prepare yourself for the Kung Fu Soundwave!
Today, we’re taking a timeout to break through the fourth wall of online features about games to highlight the seven worst games set in the worlds of great games. Why? Because these minigames are a special breed of boring. We’re tired of tacked-on gambling activities, awful fictional sports, and stale satires of classic arcade hits that dwell in the bowels of some of the best games ever.
Why does this happen?
We know. We sound like pricks sometimes. Having spent so much time crapping all over just about everything in the Game-O-Sphere, some of you may’ve forgotten that we actually like to play games. So, this episode we’ve set aside some time to talk about some upcoming titles that we’re genuinely excited about.
Oh, we’re still mocking idiotic game audio, laughing hysterically at a certain publisher’s R &B theme song, and mulling over the game smooches creepy enough to deflate boners on Jupiter. But just in time for VD, we’re also spreading a little bit of love to all comers. Don’t worry - we still have a fart button.
Not so lucky in love? Dreading Valentine’s Day because it’s yet another reminder of what some vindictive ex did to you, or how everything was once going so well and now all your dating options are miserable? Do you feel like breaking a heart this time around? If so, may we suggest these killer organs who are already seeking to break you.
We are all guilty of taking game development for granted. Yes, even you, the guy who plays Call of Duty 4 and wonders why co-op wasn’t implemented. As most of us know, development is less magical and more rigorous – terrible deadlines, limited resources and limited manpower – all factor in to creating what we play for the holiday season.
Why shouldn’t we be able to play all of our favorite movies? Who cares if they barely have relevance outside of a VH1 retrospective, it’s not like this is a new concept. Chow Yun-Fat getting too elderly for a Hard Boiled sequel BAM: John Woo’s Stranglehold! Dan Aykroyd’s getting the run around from Hollywood? BOOM: Ghostbusters is hitting every platform this summer. Hell, both The Godfather and Scarface have gotten revisionist updates, Al Pacino’s participation be damned!
There are two types of gamers: the ones who love explosions, and the ones who love explosions in 1080p at 60 fps. Whether you’re a fan of shooters or strategy games, 8-bit or HD, we still all share the common appreciation of a good bang (ha, you WISH!). To show our love of all things that go BOOM, we’ve collected some of videogames' most epic explosions and set them to a bangin’ soundtrack.
Street Fighter boasts more quality concept art per release than any other gaming franchise we can think of. Each and every sequel is packed with stunning, hand-drawn works of genius, right up to and including Udon’s amazing work with HD Remix.
Since videogames are notoriously inept at rendering romance on the screen, we’re celebrating the Valentine “holiday” with these seven most embarrassing and excruciating moments. Beware - the following kisses are so bizarre, so disgusting or so damn awkward that they could literally cause you physical pain.
It kind of bugs us that naked man animals in games are missing the very anatomical equipment that defines them as men. We think it's massively unfair that they are never given any bollocks, especially considering that lady beasts are actually dressed with extra bits to enhance and accentuate their sexuality.
To show what an abhorrent disservice game designers have been doing to dangling animal scrotums over the years, we've picked out