
Cho Aniki: Bakuretsu Ranto Hen - 1995
Tired of games that exploit women? Well, then you probably haven’t been privy to the Cho Aniki series - a collection of games that exploit not just men, but the entire concept of homosexuality itself. In the shooters, a buffed-out macho man flies through levels shooting at other, 50-foot tall macho men equipped with flying penis attacks and raunchy dildo projectiles. In the fighting-game version, you choose from a collection of oddities like a naked man riding around a half-moon and some thing resembling a condom. Meanwhile, you’ll try not to get distracted by colorful backgrounds of speedo-equipped guys in flowerbeds, among other designs.
Interestingly enough, there’s no ground in this game. In a throwback to the shooters from the rest of the series, your gaymobiles fly around during the horrendously long battles. Man, gay people wouldn’t even play this if it weren’t for the sheer novelty factor or someone telling them a gay game even existed. In fact, we’re pretty sure gay pride doesn’t revolve around a complete mockery of the lifestyle, but that’s just us. Moving on.

Buchigire Kongou: Battle Construction Vehicles - 2000
Where do you go after you have fighting games with people, animals, and robots? Exactly: tractors. Taking place at the most unruly construction site in existence, the game enables you to slowly clank around, swinging your crane at enemy John Deeres and dump trucks at the expense of your foreman. Occasionally, you’ll call in special attacks, like the completely realistic ability to quickly pummel your opponent from all sides… and the one where a giant hornet flies in to sting your enemy.
Remember that scene in Footloose when Kevin Bacon played chicken against the town asshole using tractors, while Bonnie Tyler’s epic “Holding Out for a Hero,” blared on the soundtrack? Meanwhile, the tractors were moving at a top speed of four miles per hour. Yeah, this game is the equivalent of that scene.









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