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What if Niko Bellic was in Mario Kart?

… and 9 other ludicrous game mash-ups

Words: Dave Meikleham, GamesRadar UK

So what would happen if amoral Balkan sociopath Niko Bellic was in everyone's favourite cute and cuddly cartoon racer? Would Mario and chums accept him into the line-up with grace and humility? Would Niko keep the lid on all his murderous rage when Yoshi was firing red shells up his tailpipe? Of course, not. This is what would happen if the worlds of Liberty City and the Mushroom Kingdom clashed...

And that got us thinking. What if more of our most beloved characters jumped the shark and tried different types of games? Have you ever wondered how the famously tight-lipped Gordon Freeman would get on in the chin-wagging-athon that is Mass Effect? Or pondered on what would happen if Leisure Suit Larry bumped into a Left 4 Dead witch? Well ponder no more, because we've put some of your favourite games into a big game-melding blender and come up with the following mash-ups.


Marcus Fenix in Cooking Mama

The space marine with a neck thicker than a Redwood has sawed countless pesky aliens in half with that Lancer of his. But, personally, we think it's high time he put his slicing and dicing skills to better, more culinary-centric use.


Pokémon in Afrika

Those little Nintendo blighters think they’re pretty tough with their electricity and other elemental-powered attacks, eh? Well, let’s see how they cope when they’re introduced to a little thing we like to call the circle of life… or, in this case, death.


Alex Mercer in Trauma Center

Prototype's puerile antihero can do almost anything with those claws of his. And after gutting most of New York we think it's time he gave something back to society. And what better way to be integrated back into the realms of social acceptability than trying your hand/giant pointy fingers of death at a bit of surgery?


Leisure Suit Larry in Left 4 Dead

Seeing as Lovage is the randiest thing on stubby, sex-starved legs and Left 4 Dead witches are eligible, independent females... kind of, it's pretty much a date made in heaven. Well, until the nasty evisceration part of the night that comes after dessert.


 
28 Comments
Order Comments: Newest First | Oldest First
allthegoodnameswheretaken  - 2 months 10 days ago 
Stoic Silence. First !!!!!!!!!!
noobeater  - 2 months 10 days ago 
ye ye 2nd wats it to ya


awesome article left 4 dead would be hilarious
kc2  - 2 months 10 days ago 
C-C-C COMBO BREAKER........
Lol " I acciedently botched your husbands surgery and cut out his spleen
thomashalpenny  - 2 months 10 days ago 
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Bender
Terro  - 2 months 10 days ago 
What if Final Fantasy somehow merged with Disney and-
Oh...
It was a ludicrous, but awesome combo though.
dweller  - 2 months 10 days ago 
That's some good mash ups. I definitely didn't see the Prototype + Trauma Center coming.
Conman93  - 2 months 10 days ago 
My favourite was the sonic and kingdom hearts one.
Kingdom hearts would be like GTA with goofy if Duke joined
helix92  - 2 months 10 days ago 
LOL! Another classic article!
EmmaXII  - 2 months 10 days ago 
Awesome article!
I loved the kh one XD
Nd th mass effect/half life XD
And Yorda
"Can't we jst hold hands?"
Hurricrane  - 2 months 10 days ago 
that pic of Marcus Mama is a brilliant combo of creepy and hysterical
oryandymackie  - 2 months 10 days ago 
I wasn't too keen on the Gordon Freeman/Mass Effect "mash-up". The protagonist of Mass Effect is almost as silent as Freeman and they both, dare I say it, don't have many distinguishing characteristics.

Oh, and "allthegoodnameswheretaken"?
REPORTED.
silvereye  - 2 months 10 days ago 
I want the kingdom hearts one made NOW!
Cyberninja  - 2 months 10 days ago 
if sonic keeps getting worse than i want him in burnout
Koouunn  - 2 months 10 days ago 
lol, especially at gordan freeman in mass effect
he would be silent and he would still do her
TreeWhale  - 2 months 10 days ago 
If these games were made like that, the developers would be trillion ares.

Look I am a Whale
NelosAngelos  - 2 months 10 days ago 
[Stoic Silence]
TheNinja  - 2 months 10 days ago 
poor freeman
gopikmin  - 2 months 10 days ago 
That pokemon in Afrika screenshot is wrong unless the pokemon are strip of their moves. Then Afrika would be a dry dry wasteland by groudon or be submerged by Kyorge or Acreus would just the pokemon their moves back.
Hm..........................................................................................
GoldenMe  - 2 months 10 days ago 
@gopikman- That's the problem. Those legendaries wouldn't be in Africa, they'd probably be in a deep cave or in some ruins. Not out in the open.

@Cyberninja- Fuck you.
Rhesus  - 2 months 10 days ago 
HaaaaaaHHHHHHAAAAAAHHAAAAAAaAaaAAaa
Clever stuff

reCAPTCHA:
10 corona,
nah I'll just have one thanks.
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