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The Top 7... Fictional Presidents

The all time greatest Kings of Democracy

Words: Chris Antista, GamesRadar US


CAMPAIGN PROMISES
- Perfect Dark’s President will not bow to corporate interest or assassination attempts
- PD’s Pres. will strive to reduce reliance on the James Bond license
- PD’s Pres. promises an Expansion Pak in every Nintendo 64 by 2044

EXCELLENCE IN LEADERSHIP
If you need more proof that Perfect Dark’s Commander-in-Chef was ahead of his time, scope that resemblance to a certain African-American presidential candidate! And since he doesn’t have a name, we shall henceforth call him Brock Schmobama.


Above: Okay... maybe they’re just both black 

As an equal opportunity employer, President Schmobama has been lauded for his progressive hiring of women in the workplace, most famously in the case of Madame Joanna Dark in the first Perfect Dark game on the N64. Together this political power couple fought the good fight, toppling a plot perpetuated by defense contractors and aliens conspiring to replace Schmobama with a clone and seizing control of a WMD.

The two became thick as thieves. So chummy, in fact, that Schmobama enacted the “Infinite Retry Act” which allowed Lady Dark to endlessly kill him in the method of her choosing without fear of reprisal. Peep our video below for the many ways one can dispose of a (FICTIONAL!) President.


Above: Don’t try this at home. And especially not in the Whitehouse!

Taft’s Trivia: Unfortunately, many middle class gamers could only experience a fraction of Perfect Dark’s gameplay features, including co-op and single player! Forging an alliance with the proud country of Donkey Kong, Mr. Schmobama was instrumental in spreading awareness of the N64 Expansion Pak. Godspeed, good sir.

 

 


CAMPAIGN PROMISES
- President Max’s first course of action will be to stop his opponent’s tidal wave of destruction
- President Max will educate the populace as to what exactly a “lagomorph” is
- President Max will try to make the transition onto home consoles

EXCELLENCE IN LEADERSHIP
Freelance police work can take you places, but even the greatest gumshoe couldn’t have predicted that it would wisk them off to our nation’s highest office in the nation. Yet that’s exactly what happened to the Rabbit Thingy Least Likely when Sam and Max’s intrepid detective work landed them in the Oval Office.

 

After unseating a puppet president conspiracy seemingly ripped from the minds of Tom Clancy and Jim Henson, it’s up to Max to fill the president’s seat and bring right back to a nation torn asunder. Unfortunately, his opponent is a towering statue of President Abe Lincoln.


Above: Evil Abe 

Upon losing the election, Robo-Abe would go on a calamitous rampage, making his destruction the first on President Max’s to-do list. Fear not Sam & Max fans: President Max would live to sleuth another day. The guy never quits his day job, and continues to juggle duties of Commander-In-Chief and comedic foil throughout the end of Sam & Max’s first season.

 

Taft’s Trivia: Max is actually something called a “Lagomorph” a rodent like creature related to the rabbit family. Now you know!


 
28 Comments
Order Comments: Newest First | Oldest First
Elbo444  - 1 year 6 days ago 
FIRST!! awesome article, Fallout 2 ftw
chrisat928  - 1 year 6 days ago 
I want to run for president and my platform would be banning douchebags that write 'FIRST!' in their messages.
CuddlyBomber  - 1 year 6 days ago 
Ah man I loled. Thats good shit Chris.
Z-man427  - 1 year 6 days ago 
game presidents make Bush look like a very competent leader.
mikeo1229  - 1 year 6 days ago 
The Ackerman stuff was great.
"the Future is coming with armoured Kodiak bears, attack blimps, and enough weaponized robots to turn hope into a four letter word!"
GwaR  - 1 year 6 days ago 
The Bad Dudes and the Metal Gears pieces had me rolling. If only everything could be as cool as it was during the Double Dragon clone days. Well done.
metroid2099400  - 1 year 6 days ago 
I'd have to dissagree with some of the Halo comment. I've only played the first one, but there are clearly australian voices for some of the NPCs. otherwise a great article!!
Cwf2008  - 1 year 6 days ago 
Haha loved the first paragraph. I always knew GamesRadar had a sense of humor, but that joke about George W. Bush being a good president was the best joke i heard today.
rockingamer247  - 1 year 6 days ago 
Hey!! What happened to President Harling from Ace Combat 5. That guy actually knew a thing or two about runnin a country
SpartanBannana  - 1 year 6 days ago 
You should have included *Nasally voice* John Henry Eden
skyguy343  - 1 year 6 days ago 
i cant quite remember the prez from destroy all humans but he at least deserves honourable mention, i think
mirthor  - 1 year 6 days ago 
dudes metal wolf chaos is the best game evar! any president with a mech who hates his vice pres gets my vote!
bron1417  - 1 year 5 days ago 
awesome article man.
Infinitybla  - 1 year 5 days ago 
I totally agree with number one, and Sam's as well.
Diamondis  - 1 year 5 days ago 
Is it just me, or does Big Boss look like the floating head from the old Gamesmaster TV show on channel 4? lol
Kerfluffle  - 1 year 5 days ago 
The President in Destroy All Humans! is President Huffman you kill/disintegrate him near the end of the game and then impersonate him as president.

It does deserve an honorable mention.
FancyRat  - 1 year 5 days ago 
I'd vote for you, chrisat928.
georgeguy  - 1 year 5 days ago 
wow nice artial GR

and the prez for dah deserves a mention...
misfit119  - 1 year 5 days ago 
It's amazing that people think that firsting makes them cool or something. It takes a special sort of something to make an internet poster seem even lamer than normal but these firsters have definitely found it.

And I remember President Ronnie in Bad Dudes, that was awesome.
KHS_Kid  - 1 year 5 days ago 
What about president eden from fallout 3
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