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Some Multiwinia advice: if you’re going to type chat messages, type them quickly. In the few seconds it takes to tell ShrimpVektor79 about your toenail operation, or remind PenzancePete that his mum smells of poo, the seeds of defeat can be sown, watered, germinated, harvested, and served up steaming in a tasty defeat-sprout stir-fry. This hectic multiplayer-focused Darwinia spinoff is as full of glee and spectacle as any RTS we know.
The lazy played-it-for-20-minutes review: Tearing round bumpy dirt tracks on a 250cc Kawasaki should be fun, shouldn’t it? So why are we finding this digital depiction so exasperating? Just negotiating a corner successfully is cause for applause. Lean a fraction too far and you topple into the mud. Too little and you’re off into the scenery. Josh Vanderhoof, the lone coder, boasts of “complete motorcycle physics” – whatever he’s done, the result is bikes reluctant to turn and scarily prone to washing out on bends.
Five minutes in, one thing was clear. Despite our best efforts to kill the trees and build a vale of torment that would leave its residents a quivering mess, “Animal Crossing” would have been a more appropriate name.
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