Zombies never seem to score an even break. Once again they are the subject of our gaming enmity, their sad lives cut short with axes, chainsaws, flamethrowers and shotguns, while we make quips and wait for the next upgrade. The whole thing probably sounds familiar – and it should. ...

Great love triangles of our time: the frog, the zombie and us. Oh, how we long to marry both, but society’s cruel rules forbid it. Also, there’s no space for two wives on the character screen. Damn it. This is a strategy-RPG in the mould of Heroes of Might & Magic, with a simple structure – perform quests, build armies, kill other armies – that still manages to be consistently surprising. ...

At 20 years old we were still struggling with the intricacies of laundry, but here it’s the starting point for ten years of socializing, wage slavery and dentistry. The idea is to find fame, fortune and happiness by micromanaging your character’s life. The catch? You can only choose one activity a night and two on a Saturday or Sunday. And activities make you happy. ...

With Brutal Legend’s fate still undecided, you might think us mad for recommending Kung Fu Panda as an alternative adventure starring Jack Black (not least because all the voices in this tie-in game are sadly provided by so-so stand-ins), but bear with us. First of all, we’re not so addled with bonhomie thanks to our experience with this silly game to deny that the action is the definition of ‘par for the ...