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Nintendo: Banned in the USA

ALCOHOL

Gun.Smoke

Nintendo of America’s rules and regs applied to packaging and manuals as well. Above we can see the original and revised cover art for Capcom’s largely forgotten Gun.Smoke, featuring a far more subdued “SALOON” on the right.

Final Fight

In addition to changing the name of a nightspot from “BAR” to “CLUB,” the US version of Final Fight also had to drop any and all Whiskey-based power-ups.

Punch-Out!!


Above: Keep telling yourself those are “soda” bottles, America 

While fairly common knowledge in these here circles, many of you younglings currently rocking the Wii Punch-Out!! may not be aware that the man you know as “Soda Popinski” originally went by the name “Vodka Drunkenski.”


Above: Oh Nintendo, you rascally racists! 

But once you’re aware that Soda was originally a hard drinkin’ Ruskie stereotype, his fermented quotes are given a whole new, much more understandable context.


Above: All quotes that still exist in the game! Though we should commend him for advocating responsible driving 


NAZIS

Bionic Commando

This probably isn’t news to any of you, but yeah, the Japanese Bionic Commando is all about the fighting the Nazis.

Nintendo mandated that the most popular, and currently overused, villains of all time be removed. Ambiguous dates remained, but Swastikas were substituted with Third Reich-ish eagles, and the Nazis were referred to as “The Badds.”


Above: Look, no Wife-Arm! 

It’s not as if anyone was denying the connection, especially since the Japanese title translates to “Top Secret! Hitler’s Revival.” But who wouldn’t rather fight the Fuehrer instead of Master-D:

But if you have an internet connection, you no doubt already know how this ended.

 

Wolfenstein 3D

Seemingly unaware that most of the gaming world was already hip to the fact that Wolfenstein 3D featured Nazis having already played it for free, Nintendo ordered id to remove all the swastikas from the environment, leading to some of the prettiest red drapes you ever did see!

Above Right: No, that’s A. Dolph Schmidtler 

And it only took the omission of a couple of black pixels to turn Adolf Hitler’s portrait into the stache-less, Super NES exclusive, “Staatmeister!”


 

GOD

The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time

Following Ganondorf’s de-bloodening, Nintendo also opted to take out a couple of references that could’ve potentially angered the forever angry Islamic community. In addition to removing a song featuring a Muslim chant from the Fire Temple, Link’s Mirror shield was adorned with a crescent moon symbol synonymous with a Hyrulian desert tribe known as the Gerudo… and yeah, the Islamic faith. Whoopsy! Majora’s Mask introduced a new Gerudo symbol, and the Mirror Shield would reflect that (HAR HAR) in Ocarina’s later iterations.

Ducktales

Imagine the surprise of the Disney developers’ faces when Nintendo sent back Ducktales for “Objectionable Content.”

Final Fight

Right after you demolish a stranger’s sedan for no reason other than bonus points, Nintendo of America refused to let the poor owner cry out to his Lord thy God.

Castlevania III: Dracula’s Curse

“Okay, Konami. If you absolutely must have a cross, please take it down a notch.”


SLANG

Super Mario RPG

Squint a bit and you can see that Bowser’s Japanese victory gesture is reminiscent of how Italians flip people the bird. Ooooooooh, dis guy!

Maniac Mansion

Above you’ll find one of the silliest of several billion asinine edits forced upon the NES port. Click here to read even more ludicrous edits from Douglas Crockford, the poor bastard in charge of the Maniac Mansion’s NES port.

Final Fight

All the Hulkamania in the world couldn’t keep Final Fight’s first boss from a name change. Hell, even the biblical/anal sex reference couldn’t escape that scrutiny:

Ballz 3D

A harmless testicle metaphor found in the Genesis version of Ballz 3D was excised completely on the SNES… which may have lead to some retaliatory overcompensation:

Jul 22, 2009


The Top 7... Nudity You Didn't Notice
Look closer - gaming is even naughtier than you think

 

Why Japanese box art is better...
... except when it's not. Nine astounding differences between East and West


Why Japanese game ads are the best in the world
How can other commercials compare with cuddly toys, smooching strangers and homicidal women?

102 comments

  • Videogamer555 - September 2, 2012 5:09 p.m.

    Nintendo missed some things that "needed" censoring according to their strict standards. Some of which are in their OWN GAMES (like Zelda games and Kid Icarus)! You'd think they'd know the content of their own games well enough to know where the things that would "need" censoring (prior to shipping to the US) would be. But it seems they missed some things. Things Nintendo did NOT censor in their US game releases are: Princess Ruto in Zelda Ocarina of Time is fully naked in all versions of the game (1.0,1.1,1.2,gamecube, and probably virtual console as well). Crosses are present on all of the tomb stones in the grave yard in the NES Legend of Zelda game (and probably also on the Virtual Console version of the game). Crosses are present on both the normal and the large shield in the NES Legend of Zelda game (and probably also on the Virtual Console version of the game). In the game Kid Icarus for NES, in the final level (the sky level with Pit flying and using light arrows). There are several topless woman statues who look like the famous Venus De Milo statue. I'm guessing these weren't removed in the virtual console version either, but I could be wrong.
  • alex-mento - June 21, 2012 5:49 a.m.

    Lets point fingers!! Mhmm *FAGS* Hm Cough cough* Douches*
  • axelgarcia1 - November 1, 2009 5:09 a.m.

    lol good article
  • taylorte10 - August 25, 2009 11:07 p.m.

    it should be banned from the us
  • alex-mento - June 21, 2012 5:54 a.m.

    FUCK YOU.
  • doomdoomdoom - August 20, 2009 11:06 p.m.

    Fuck Nintendo Fuck Mario Fuck Metroid Fuck the Wii And go fuck wii owners that like Mario And Fuck Street Fighter 4 This is a message from The Wii Sucks Dick Corps.
  • CharLes14 - July 31, 2009 1:28 a.m.

    i always hated nintendo. SUCKS TO BE THEM! hehehe.
  • caboose4400 - July 30, 2009 12:19 p.m.

    this is why i dont play nintendo games that much except for mario cuz nintendo only belives in family fun and non hurtful games they rarely have violant games and how can one censor MK.....thats just not COOL!!!!
  • secretsearcher - July 29, 2009 8:20 p.m.

    wow. I typed random letters for the second half of my reCaptcha and it still worked.
  • secretsearcher - July 29, 2009 8:19 p.m.

    I think that Nintendo should of censored some of the nudity and stuff, but changing "Oh my God" to "Oh my car" is just ridiculous.
  • DeathbyFira - July 27, 2009 11:55 p.m.

    to think that now they are trying to make more aduilt games now and to think they cut all this good crap out lol
  • doomdude - July 27, 2009 1:52 a.m.

    who needs nintindo anyway *turns off DS* i mean they dont allow nudity screw them *turns off SNES, WII, GameCube*
  • zeetlock - July 25, 2009 2:36 p.m.

    I don't think if I were playing those games (one from japan one from america) I wouldn't notice the differences that much maybe if I was looking for them (except for green blood in Zelda:OoT)
  • EndOfEternity - July 25, 2009 3:40 a.m.

    I hate censoring!!!So,unnecessary.
  • charley235 - July 24, 2009 4:18 a.m.

    i love this article, very creative
  • TheWebSwinger - July 24, 2009 2:16 a.m.

    Wait, Brett didn't write this? I'm shocked. Anyways, amazing article, ChrisBrett. And congrats on the Digg prominence.
  • AndyGiff93 - July 23, 2009 10:56 p.m.

    Wow some of those things are just pathetic. Cool article though, enjoyed reading it
  • Brutel - July 23, 2009 10:15 p.m.

    YES... I went back into my collection of N64 games and found out I'm lucky enough to own an uncensored Zelda: OoT with red blood O.o
  • maiden666 - July 23, 2009 8:41 p.m.

    dude there is a youtube video bout banjo kazooie and it shows stuff like that and worse its called banjo kazooie rated E ? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rpPnK2Bl0Pk
  • Csheroe - July 23, 2009 7:53 p.m.

    Sweet article. I knew about castlevania. I didn't know about the cross though.

Showing 1-20 of 102 comments

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