But we know that affection can blind us to the truth, and we're well aware that Kororinpa has flaws. The levels can be too short and, actually, the death-defying leaps to get certain gems aren't really death-defying. You have an unlimited number of lives, and whenever you respawn at the start, you no longer need to collect the gems you got before dying. So there's no incentive to complete the level in one go without falling off the edge. It's not so much death-defying as suicide-inducing. Oh Kororinpa, no! Just when we were falling for your ready handling and flexible boards. Plus, the multiplayer has no player interaction - so what if player two gets to use the Nunchuk? How the hell is that meant to make us feel better now?
And then - oh, as if Kororinpa hadn't already lied to us about how much it has to offer - getting to the end of the first 45 levels unlocks another 45 levels, but they're just the first levels reversed. Not played from back to front. Just mirrored. It was about at this point that our heart broke, and we couldn't do anything but weep softly.
Kororinpa - how could you do this to us? You didn't keep the promises you made. We left Monkey Ball for you, and going back to its minimally tilty boards would just be a dry and empty experience now. We're left alone with you, and all we can think about is how great it should have been. Balls.