GamesRadar's E3 2010 awards

A full year ago we poked fun at Microsoft’s “Natal” demonstrations, saying they were reactionary gasps attempting to collect some of that casual Nintendo cash. This year, both Microsoft and Sony spent a sickening amount of time trying to convince us how revolutionary and unprecedented both of their motion-waggle efforts are, in what appeared to be two companies caught in a (hands free!) dick waving contest they didn’t realize they had already lost… four years ago. Move especially, as no matter how you slice it, it looks just like a Wii Remote with a glowing ball, and that’s exactly how the public will perceive it.

Runner up: Kinect

If you must argue its virtues, Kinect at least has no wands to wave and offers other social experiences outside of stiff, uninteresting tech demos. Dance Central was cool too, but it’s not system-selling cool, and the other stuff on display wasn’t cutting it either.

What’s that, Sony? No Harry Potter license? But you’ve made a Harry Potter game anyway and called it Sorcery? Isn’t that going to look a bit awkward when it finally appears? Oh, no matter. No one’s going to notice it. In fact it probably won’t even get released. Because it’s a content-deprived, one-trick pony design with the sole purpose of saying ‘Hey, look, you can move a character and use motion control. This Move thing isn’t a load of casual old toss after all’. But we can’t hear it very well over the sound of it being crap.

Runner-up: The Fight: Lights Out

And here’s a game trying to say ‘Look, gritty men in prisons with sweat and stuff. This isn’t just Wii Sports Boxing, you know’ But it is. With gritty men in prisons with sweat and stuff.

It was meant to be there. Not officially, but in our minds. And after Nintendo showed off their gorgeous new handheld, the stage was set for Sony to trump it with a portable PS3 or suchlike. But precisely nothing happened – just a new advertising campaign for the existing PSP. Maybe, just maybe, Sony realized their new machine is already obsolete compared to Nintendo's and pulled it from the show at the last minute. Is that why Kevin Butler had such a long spot? Hmmm…

Runner-up: Half-Life 3

We saw Portal 2, but nothing else whatsoever from Valve. We will get HL3 one day… right, Gabe?

As much as we've made fun of the Nintendo Wii over the past few years, we really don't hate motion controls - a future filled with Holodecks has to start somewhere. What frustrates and disappoints us is how motion controls have been used in games thus far: mostly, as a gimmicky tool for silly party compilations and crappy first person shooters. But it didn't have to be that way...
Which is why, against our better judgment, we were honestly pretty excited about Project Natal, now known as Microsoft Kinect. Maybe a more hardcore console would take a more hardcore approach to motion-sensitivity. Even as we stood for two hours in Los Angeles's Galen Theater, adorned in glowing white space robes and surrounded by "whimsical" circus performers, we held out hope.

Above: Somewhere during hour two
But then the show / demo actually began. You've no doubt heard about the ridiculous set design, the pretentious narration and the armies of actors paid to pretend like Kinect just transformed their lives forever. That's a single, badly planned night. What truly offended was the lineup of Kinect games revealed, each more casual and Wii-wannabe than the last: bowling, rafting, jumping, tiger tickling, running in place and a whole lot of meaningless arm waving (including meaningless lightsaber-swinging).
This didn't look like the future of gaming, but an obvious and kind of desperate attempt to catch up to Nintendo's past. When we're praying for titles like Dance Central, Your Shape and Milo & Kate to save the new system, you know something's wrong.

Runner up: Sitting through Your Shape demo twice

Seeing Your Shape: Fitness Evolved onstage at the Microsoft press conference was one of the slowest, dullest moments in a presser filled with slow, dull moments. Sitting through that presentation again, repeated almost word-for-word, at the Ubisoft presser later that same day? Excruciating.

Final page: Every game that won the prized GamesRadar Orange Ribbon!

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  • wiitard07 - June 21, 2010 7:57 p.m.

    @ phillipshaw oh so you dont think that you should just buy an eyetoy?
  • Defguru7777 - June 21, 2010 12:06 a.m.

    Despite all the crap at this year's E3, I'm more excited for gaming than I have been for a while. And it made me care about Nintendo again.
  • g4m3rk1dd - June 20, 2010 8:44 p.m.

    new 360? YAY! blueray? wtf? now the only reason im getting it is becuase of all the trade in offers at my local game store and because i bought my 360 the day it came out (that means a 20GB hard drive and less ports for por-stuff...) they better do something big with kinetic. like make a GoW4 for it...or a really B/A FPS 3DS is going to be amazing and kid icarus looks awesome already but i still want my pokemanz to look like a normal game (NOT facing the ground SEEING the tall grass being tall and being able to walk through it...too much to ask for i guess but meh) also beast mode for GoW2 looks like if only we could get CoG to have different classes like the locust do? kthxsbai
  • michaelmcc827 - June 20, 2010 6:08 p.m.

    No love for The Old Republic? Oh well.
  • BadCompanyBrik - June 20, 2010 2:43 p.m.

    I knew Bungie made a mistake... they would have stolen the show had they shown the awesome new map creator they no doubt have cooking. Instead of showing off space combat, then confirming that it's not MP...
  • foxyexplosion - June 20, 2010 8:37 a.m.

    Am I the only one who thinks the kinect with that silly dance game will be a bread winner in japan? [source]
  • daLadiesman217 - June 20, 2010 8:09 a.m.

    why did dat kid in da laser tag game have to Say everything hes out of? LOL
  • RonaldRayGun - June 20, 2010 4:37 a.m.

    Good stuff in here!
  • Spacegrass - June 20, 2010 3:20 a.m.

    Saints Row 3? How did you put a ribbon on something that wasn't there? Also, no love for The Old Republic?
  • Zanthis - June 19, 2010 10:45 p.m.

    I'm glad to see my desire to play Dance Central is not completely out of left field. What really sucks is that I have to buy Kinect first, $150 my ass.
  • kicking222 - June 19, 2010 10:41 p.m.

    I know I've said this about a million times in a million different places, but... Kasson Crooker is my favorite musician ever. That is not an exaggeration. His pre-Freezepop band (Splashdown) completely changed my life. He's also an incredibly kind person who I've been fortunate enough to meet and correspond with many times over the years. Kasson Crooker is as close as I have to a hero, and that's not a "Guitar Hero" pun. I think what a lot of people don't realize is that Kasson won a Game Developers Choice Award for the first "Guitar Hero" game and is the very first name you see in the credits for "Rock Band 2". He's been instrumental (again, no pun intended) to Harmonix's past games, and if THIS is what he is working on right now, I have absolutely no doubt that it will be an excellent game. I don't think I'm getting a Kinect, but if I do, "Dance Central" will definitely be my first purchase. Plus, despite having followed the man for over a decade, I had never once seen Kasson do anything close to dance (unless he was behind a keytar while playing in Freezepop). So that was quite a treat.
  • barrage7667 - June 19, 2010 9:59 p.m.

    ok...shadow of rome is still a great game I WANT A SECOND ONE OR SOMETHING!! so well made
  • JADENkOTOR - June 19, 2010 5:37 p.m.

    Most graphics or Best graphics? huh... Was Zelda really that good to get runner-up Best In Show? The only demo i saw was during the conference which was terrible. It must be holy shit awesome to deserve that prestige especially with so many great titles shown.
  • Dorglesisthebest - June 19, 2010 5 p.m.

    Deus Ex 3 actually showed?
  • EffinChrys - June 19, 2010 4:59 p.m.

    No GUN 2 yet? Well that's just horse shit * * Yes, I'm aware RDR is a good game. But I love me some GUN. ** ** I'm also aware that GUN will probably never even have a sequel.
  • GameManiac - June 19, 2010 4:48 p.m.

    No crap the 3DS gets "Best in Show"! Nintendo is always trying to outdo themselves and stand out, and they sure as hell have on this year's E3. I only wish the pic placed for that award expressed those three words with more emphasis.
  • ultimatepunchrod - June 19, 2010 2:45 p.m.

    i think sorcery for only $40 is definitely worth it and yea whatever
  • TwistOfFate94 - June 19, 2010 12:22 p.m.

    Why didnt you give Wwe all stars the best booth award XD?
  • NeonSalmon - June 19, 2010 11:07 a.m.

    I surprised that the move sorcery game didn't win you least hated motion game as it actually looked pretty cool
  • philipshaw - June 19, 2010 9:58 a.m.

    I have to agree with most of this but imo Move looks better than Kinetic because I can see myself playing games like Socom 4 with Move