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GamesRadar Ultimate Character Battle! - Day 1

FROM: Mortal Kombat series/Starfox series

Fox does a barrel roll and uses the boost to get through. This takes him out of bounds, and Sub-Zero wins by forfeit. Flawless victory! Banality!


FROM: Donkey Kong Country 3/Duke Nukem series

Dixie tries to use her helicopter ponytail bullshit to jump on Duke Nukem's head. Duke, unfazed, shows her his "Dixie" and mercilessly whales on her bongos. Nukem wins. Can you believe this was written by college graduates?


FROM: Heavenly Sword/The Incredible Hulk: Ultimate Destruction

HULK SMASH. Nariko fails to save the PS3. Hulk wins.

 


FROM: Half-Life series/Duck Hunt

The dog laughs. Gordon bashes his head in with a crowbar. Everyone laughs.


FROM: Castlevania series/Okami

Amaterasu uses her paintbrush to paint a really gay-looking mustache on Simon’s face. The paint contains traces of peanuts. Simon, allergic to peanuts, goes into anaphylactic shock and dies. Painty wolf wins.

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19 comments

  • Security77 - May 1, 2011 3:13 p.m.

    *Spoiler Alert* Hah, now we know that nothing can stop the companion cube! Not even fire!
  • Miles_Endsly - April 11, 2011 9:18 p.m.

    This single article has shown me the light... Mario truly is wonderful...
  • REDman171 - November 28, 2010 5:54 p.m.

    cool
  • Bonesqaw - November 17, 2010 6:13 p.m.

    Greatest character battle of all time!
  • Hellwilder - September 26, 2009 1:33 p.m.

    There goes Cloud's Fall Out Boy CD collection xD
  • Corsair89 - October 8, 2008 8:22 p.m.

    Why is Mario really really evil in this?
  • Da-Ku - September 5, 2008 2:33 p.m.

    He has a point
  • Black_X_1111 - September 1, 2008 1:37 a.m.

    That wasnt a fair fight. The internet shouldn,t have been aloud to fight!! I want a rematch!!!!
  • Narudude360 - June 25, 2009 11:32 p.m.

    TEEEEEEEEEEEEEETEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES! Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka WakkaWakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka WaWakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka Wakka.
  • Elfangor01 - May 31, 2009 3:06 a.m.

    This is probably among the funniest things I have ever read, this made my summer last year thank you Gamesradar, and revisiting it brings back so much nostalgia.
  • diddly - April 28, 2009 8:47 p.m.

    this is an amazing article!! Bets fight = "The dog laughs. Gordon bashes his head in with a crowbar. Everyone laughs." oh, ya. That and tony hawk does a wicked kickflip.... this game sucks. Never laughed so hard, thanks alot for this.
  • Yar - September 17, 2009 4:18 p.m.

    This was a pretty good article, but you went from comedic to serious and back too many times. I mean, Sub Zero beats Starfox, Gordon Freeman, Mario, and then Sly Cooper, and then you just show a scene from the MK movie and say he's out. The internet should've never beaten anyone either. Link would pwn the internet. :P
  • Kruton - June 1, 2009 4:09 p.m.

    Holy shit, where did you get that evil pacman picture? I want it.
  • Hurricrane - May 30, 2009 11:56 p.m.

    LOL Roman calls Snake, brilliant
  • fatcat275 - May 19, 2009 5:35 a.m.

    The Mario and Niko ones made me laugh until I cried gravy. strange.
  • magicxmaster - April 27, 2009 10:22 p.m.

    mario cant be evil
  • skyguy343 - April 27, 2009 8:15 p.m.

    @ Corsair89 cuz mario is a total badass ;) easily one of their best articles, but hulk vs interwebs?
  • theschwartzb - April 7, 2009 11:02 p.m.

    rofl "The dog laughs. Gordon bashes his head in with a crowbar." that is some funny shit right thar.
  • C-C-C-C-ComboCro - January 21, 2009 5:32 a.m.

    PAINTY WOLF WINS!!!!

Showing 1-19 of 19 comments

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