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9 games you probably played and didn't even know were censored

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Fahrenheit/Indigo Prophecy

Censored in: The US

The predecessor to Heavy Rain (which itself had that whole 'why render pubic hair if you never get to see it' fiasco) has a difference between the German version and the US version. That's no surprise - if any game gets censored, it gets censored in Germany. However, it's not the way you'd expect. It's the US version that had content censored to appease the ratings board - in this case the ESRB.

Ladies - how many of you wear a swimsuit in the shower? Apparently it's perfectly normal behavior, if Carla's shower scene is anything to go by. A small, barely-there swimsuit, granted, but a swimsuit nonetheless.

Above: Carla's place. Not the best place to stay if you're big on personal hygiene

That's not the only instance of censorship in the US version. It's curtains for the old sexy sex too, quite literally:

Above: "Oh, Carla... I think I... I think I might actually love these curtains" "Naff off"

Ironically for an article about censorship, there are some images from the game we'd better not show you (brilliant, huh?) because they feature full-frontal nudity and more. But we definitely can show you the US version of those scenes. Ready? Here goes:

Above: Not even a swimsuit could save this scene

Remember that scene in Baywatch where the Hoff delivered the baby without the mother even taking off her swimsuit? Confused the hell out of me as a kid, I can tell you. I'm guessing a swimsuit here would have been just as confusing. Let's move swiftly on, it's getting weird in here.

Prince of Persia: The Two Thrones

Censored in: Europe

The PAL version of the third 'new' Prince of Persia game undid all the gory work of the Warrior Within. Gone were the decapitations, the generous splashings of blood and the neat bisections of enemies. You want your foes to be divisible by two? Either face up against a group totaling an even number (that's terrible, sorry) or buy the US version of the game. Yup, there's the rub.

Above: No, honest, it won't come off mate - look. What's that? You're NTSC? Oops...

Parappa The Rapper 2

Censored in: The US

Kick, Punch, it's all in the mind / if you ask the censors then / I'll think you'll find... that any kind of alcohol references will push your game up to a Teen rating. Oh. So snip went Beard Burger Master's line, "tastes better than wine", replaced with "so you better get in line." Are wine gums called line gums in the States?

But that wasn't the only line altered to avoid that world-ending rating of T for Teen. The shockingly double entendre-laden line 'Warm your buns' was replaced with 'toast your buns', just to be sure there was no misunderstanding that everyone's rapping about bread products and not somebody's bottom. Even though he immediately goes on to say 'Mmm, my buns are very toasty'. Facepalm.

Finally, just in case anyone got offended at the mere suggestion that religion actually exists, Guru Ant's references to 'being the Lord' were changed to 'being the man'. There is a phrase used over here to describe unlikely events that goes 'only in America'. In this case, it's actually true. The Japanese and UK versions of the game went on sale unedited. And nobody took offense.

No More Heroes

Censored in: Japan and Europe

Perhaps the most widely-known case of censorship in this list, No More Heroes was widely censored... but not in the US. The North American version features decapitations, buckets of blood and even bisection of foes. You can see the rather marked differences here:

But neither version featured the 'normal' speed version of the plot explanation, which was deemed so extreme, it was sped up to chipmunk speed so that nobody could understand it. Of course, we slowed it back down again. It really is all about the age rating. 

We hear that Suda 51's forthcoming cheerleader killing spree Lollipop Chainsaw is having some content removed in Japan, at least in the regular version. Don't get too happy with that knife over our version, Suda...

The Witcher

Censored in: The US

The Witcher is an openly M-rated game, which means it doesn't have to fan- faff about with pandering to the censors too much. Or so you'd think. Even though the game is still pretty raunchy and you can claim a trophy 'sex card' from every lady you have intimate relations with in the game, said cards were not free from the censor's eye.

The US version covers up the pictures a tad. Well, often more than a tad. Look:

Above: Come on, that's only my second internet cat joke in six years

That said, the uncensored versions I found while researching this article are probably going to get me in trouble with my IT department any minute n

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35 comments

  • bamit11 - February 12, 2012 9:53 a.m.

    I'm a Fallout freak so I knew 3 was censored. But, I didn't play like any of the other games, so didn't know about them
  • Mezolitik - February 11, 2012 5:36 p.m.

    The Fallout 3 thing makes me laugh. It's like, 'sure, put that landmine in his pocket and blast his eyeballs into outer space, but DON'T DO DRUGS!!' Damn you, censorship cat!
  • musashi1596 - February 11, 2012 12:17 p.m.

    The weird thing about the nunchaku censorship in the EU is that nunchaku are legal to own in the EU, but illegal in the US. I own two pairs myself as a UK resident.
  • talleyXIV - February 11, 2012 9:31 a.m.

    Ugh Australians, Fallout 3 could have been that much cooler without you.
  • delmariachi - February 10, 2012 4:38 a.m.

    Last Bronx on Saturn had a similar issue to Soul Calibur with one of the characters, I think their nunchuks turned into a three piece wooden weapon... Was very strange back then...
  • jiodjflak - February 9, 2012 7:18 a.m.

    For everyone who doesnt know, you can get the uncensored version on farenheight on GOG
  • morbiusdog - February 9, 2012 4:43 a.m.

    That girl in the last picture has a lovely pussy.
  • CitizenWolfie - February 9, 2012 1:36 a.m.

    Truly Pythonesque ending there. Well done!
  • Mamudo - February 9, 2012 1:12 a.m.

    I knew the Witcher was censored, had no idea about parappa and fallout though. and I din't know the Japanese version of no more heroes was either.
  • darnell-l-armstrong - February 8, 2012 9:38 p.m.

    some more games that were censored: Final Fantasy 4-The dancer that danced for you actually stripped in the JP version Snatcher-The part where the dog gets killed(you see twitching guts in the JP version)....And the "lolicon" shower scene....In the JP version of game, also....
  • FauxFurry - February 8, 2012 4:35 p.m.

    I'm guessing that Earthbound/Mother 2 wasn't included because not many people actually played that game(or was already mentioned in a previous article or something perfectly reasonable like that). Shame, that. Censorship is always wrong no matter what the content being obscured for whatever so-called 'noble' purpose. On the other hand, practical editing for content cohesion/correct continuity or humor factor is quite alright. Is not making people laugh truly the noblest goal of them all?
  • kyle94 - February 8, 2012 3:13 p.m.

    The Enhanced Edition of the Witcher had the uncensored cards, and was released in the US. ...not that I would know about that sort of stuff. *cough*
  • D0CCON - February 8, 2012 3:10 p.m.

    I knew all about the Fallout 3 and Witcher censorship. This title lied to me, there were only 7 games I didn't know were censored.
  • el.waxa - February 8, 2012 1:06 p.m.

    I was a bit bummed out that there was no gore in No more heroes but I guess the Censored version makes it look like the wounds are cauterised which is quite cool.
  • JMarsella09 - February 8, 2012 12:37 p.m.

    The PSP version of Two Thrones also had all the blood removed. It was definitely noticeable.
  • EwoksTasteLikeChicken - February 8, 2012 12:27 p.m.

    At first I thought this was a joke. I had no idea about these censors.
  • MetroidPrimeRib - February 8, 2012 11:39 a.m.

    Resident Evil 5 was censored. Compare the Chainsaw death from 4 to 5 and you'll find it a bit lacking.
  • skowronskim - February 8, 2012 11:32 a.m.

    Um...Saints Row the Third did have farts in a jar. Its on the last mission if you go and save your gang members.
  • GamesRadarMikelReparaz - February 8, 2012 11:57 a.m.

    It's been fixed, but thanks (to everyone else as well) for pointing it out.
  • JSayonara - February 8, 2012 11:22 a.m.

    You forgot Manhunt 2 and the original non shitty Punisher game. Both had death scenes that were rendered in grainy black and white to avoid offending idiots who accidently misread the game titles as reading "Super Happy Fun Kitten game for small children".

Showing 1-20 of 35 comments

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