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Why do licensed kiddie games suck?

Maybe we’re just nostalgic for the Capcom/Disney era, maybe we just don’t “get it,” but didn’t we used to like kid’s games?

Words: Tyler Wilde, GamesRadar US
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48 Comments
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BoondockSaint54  - 9 months 9 days ago 
Good article. Makes me think back to playing all those Rescue Ranger, Duck Tales, etc games and having a blast with them when I was a kid.
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NinjaCake  - 9 months 9 days ago 
the only kid game that belived to be good was the buzz-lightyear one on n64. also pokemon ,but i don't think that counts since adults play it to (sad lonley adults)
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RedOutlive10  - 9 months 9 days ago 
I loved many Mickey Mouse games, for Master System, Genesis and SNES. Some of them would even allow co-op play (the sucky part is player2 having to play with Minie). There were gadgets, shrinking potions, clothing that gives you an ability adding many gameplay variations, those games were freaking fun, and the items were fun to use, could be compared to Zelda's in my book (even being platformers). It's sad to see so many titles plagued with some generic beat em up crap really.
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Jbo87  - 9 months 9 days ago 
I think some of the problem is due to the advances in gaming hardware. During the 2D gaming era there were serious limits to how complicated you could make a game. The difference back then between kiddie and adult was the source material. I.e. Shinobi was an 'adult' game whereas 'Ducktale' was a kids game but due to the 2D factor they were ultimately quite similar to play.

Once 3D gaming arrived and gameplay variety increased we became much more discerning. Maybe the answer to the 'Kiddie Question' is to go back to 2D games. This would give those gamers who want a 2D rennaisance something to chew on and these games could be made insanely good looking with modern tech.
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CoD_22  - 9 months 9 days ago 
spiderman 2 actually wasnt that bad kinda fun to play let you really feel like you were spiderman and it could be more challenging if you wanted with stuff like the pizza delivery. not great graphics now though, and the 3rd really sucked as a game. im not sure it is to do with whether you grew up with the stuff though, im 13 and i dont really remember any good licensed kids games from the gba days (oh, the good old days of mario bros 3) or at the moment even i just tend not to buy them. sometimes ill download a demo if i really want it to be good, but then it turns out to suck like the rest (im looking at you, iron man) although, the whole lego series was pretty fun back when it was in its first carnation (now its just getting boring its so repetitive with indiana jones and batman adding to star wars) i think the whole problem is that the developers have to stick to set storylines when they base them on a film and mostly they dont bother to expand on it (when they do, they are usually better for it), and they know that they just have to mix up some cutscenes and some gameplay, get some good box artwork and a decent trailer and shove it in between the cif actifizz and ben 10 action figure adverts on citv, because the audience they are aiming it at wont read the reviews and wont even care that much if it sucks. i just wrote a lot didnt i?
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CoD_22  - 9 months 9 days ago 
@Jbo87, have you played scoopy doo on gameboy? its 2d and you wouldnt believe how boring they managed to make a platformer. actually that could be another article: why do platforming games have such a great reputation for being good? think about it, mario, sonic (when it was still a platformer now its a 3d mess of camera angles and ease), lbp, donkey kong, all the retro ones you people at gr seem to like that i dont rememeber(mega man etc.)
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Evil_AppleJuice  - 9 months 8 days ago 
Games have never grown up with us. Television has brightened children's days with laughter and brightness. When it comes to games, the essance of a video game is to provide an interactive challenge. Many of us as teens or adults now want excessive challenge, but in a kids game, it is either frustrating that a simple concept cannot be achieved, or the game is too easy. Kids want them to see the brightness and laughter. Teens and adults want the challenge that M rated games offer, death, speed, the adrenaline that kids games cant offer.
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RETROGAMER95  - 9 months 8 days ago 
DUCK AMUCK IS NOT THAT BAD ITS A GOOD BRAIN GAME ALTHOUGH IT HAS A LITTLE HINT OF GAYNESS TO IT
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beoftw  - 9 months 8 days ago 
I have to disagree. to this date i can only name maybe a small handfull of good games intended for kids. especially based off movies. and when i think back at the games i played growing up there was donky knong, aladin, mega man, metroid, etc. idk about u guys but i dont see how anyone can get off saying that games made based off of kids movies today are worth the dvds their printed on.
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EvilZeus  - 9 months 8 days ago 
some people have left comments saying wow, kid's games suck for adults. no shit. ITS A KIDS GAME!!! its in the title dammit, use deductive reasoning or common sense. its not called a kids game directed at adults now is it? a kids game is what the name implies, directed at kids
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bakakaba  - 9 months 8 days ago 
I think experience is a big part of it too. Just like with any medium be it books or film or video games, the more you sample the more you begin to understand what is you like and what is good or bad. Part of the reason the non-hardcore consumer and kids like these games is because they don't have any experience with better examples of the genre. It's the same thing with the casual market and the wii. Casual gamers and kids are more likely to be impressed with what they can do in licensed games or stuff like wii sports, and oblivious to their faults, simply because they haven't played anything else like it before. When gaming is a passion and hobby, you play alot of games, good and bad examples of games, you are more likely to recognize flaws and be less willing to accept shoddy design. When something is truly awful, it most likely will fail, but the mediocre can often succeed simply by appealing to a casual and inexperienced crowd.
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FriendlyFire  - 9 months 8 days ago 
I think my biggest fear is that, with the usually very non savvy minds of company CEOs and marketers, they start questionning why they should be making "hardcore" or "compelling" games in the first place.

I mean, why invest millions in Call of Duty 4 or Gears of War 2 when My Little Poneyz sells twice as much and costs a tenth? Of course, this can be extended quite a bit... Kid games were the main embodiement of that before, but now we also have Wii shovelware (which often also happens to be a kid game), sports games (come on, do we need a new one every year?) and even a few franchises (I still don't think Treyarch needs to be doing CoD on top of what Infinity Ward offers).

I know I'm not alone; we all weep at poor games. But they SELL! It's easy to see the problem isn't necessarily related to kid games - I think it's related to awareness. Just like how sucky blockbuster movies sell, just like how crappy books sell, just like how sub-par sports game sell, just like how idiotic toys sell, kid games will keep on selling. My issue is that I still don't believe "videogames" are considered as an art form in the way movies and books are; that is, people will create movies and books for their artistic value as opposed to strictly their financial income, but games are nearly always limited by the publishers' big pockets that need filling. If publishers begin to only make easy selling/low budget shovelware, I don't even want to imagine the look of the gaming world at that point...
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Kaz993  - 9 months 8 days ago 
Having A reviewer that enjoys writing about and playing certain kinds of games write the review for it is kind of like having the guy who likes Peanut butter try the peanut butter versus the guy who doesn't like peanut butter at all try it. My point being, that biases it. What you guys stand for is not wrong. Occasionally you guys may miss something interesting in a game or any of that crap, but the fact is, you are actual Gamers.

Keep in mind that at the certain time period we are currently in, most of these parents grew up with... Pong, and the kids are, well, kids.

In twenty years people will nto buy these games if they still exist, or at least not nearly as much. Parents will know what a good game should be by then and stop the child abuse of constantly buying these games.

You people, the reviewers, are not wrong, no. You just have a mind to know what is considered good, based on the self experience. You've played the shit, and you've learned to avoid it. Parents don't know the difference, and the kids eat it up.

geddit?
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Gotxxrock  - 9 months 8 days ago 
I remember loving one Toy Story game during the waning years of my child hood. It was on the N64. I think it was simply entitled Toy Story. You played as Buzz Lightyear, and it was just a 3D platformer in witch you just jumped around, shot things with your not so fake wrist laser, and had a rather good time of it.
Miss those old platformer days =(
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oryandymackie  - 9 months 8 days ago 
on the back of Sonic Tennis (I think that's what it's called), it's PEGI rating has FEAR and VIOLENCE on it. lol
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h3110  - 9 months 7 days ago 
u guys r lame ur like 40 years old and ur playing walle
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phoenix_wings  - 9 months 7 days ago 
Yeah, h3110, they're real lame....right. All sarcasm aside...it's already been said, most people who are looking for games for themselves know when the game they're looking to get is specifically geared towards kids and kids only. Kids are easier to amuse than their picky adult-selves.

No, what really bothers me is games that are supposedly geared towards young-adults/adults, but still has the kiddieware mentality. Namely because it's used by folks that are still wound up in the premise "whoa, look at me, I'm playing a video game!" But gradually this...easy play creeps into other games. There have always been easy games, but for quite some time it's like there have been more and more. Maybe it's just me...

....screw you Nintendo.
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samownzsnake  - 9 months 7 days ago 
im not going to say that people over 18 who play kiddie games are stupid and that its a bad thing because i still play like spider man and other kiddie games though the storylines in some of them make me want to kill myself
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Tomsta666  - 9 months 7 days ago 
I have fond memories of the disney/capcom era.
Duck Tales and Chip & Dale on the NES were almost as good as Super Mario bros.
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suicidalstickman  - 9 months 6 days ago 
It is weird kiddy games. I finished Kung Fu Panda in 2 days 100% on every level and on the hardest difficulty basically just pressing x all the way through. One of my 5/6 year old cousins found it almost impossible and he later beat me in a tournament.
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