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Trailer Trash

Like a Brillo pad to the face of bad game videos

Words: Joe McNeilly, GamesRadar US

We really scraped the bottom of the barrel to come up with this week’s Trailer Trash. These videos are so terrible that we had to say some bad words, so if you’re easily offended, please move along. There’s nothing to see here…

 

Party Fun Pirate - WiiWare

Hold still while I poke you with my dagger, mmmkay? This trailer reminds me of a joke I heard in elementary school about taking a turn “in the barrel.”

The titular “fun pirate” seems to rather enjoy getting prodded through the barrel from various angles, but the real clincher is the option to drop a tied-up a Mii into the glory hole. I simply can not believe that this deviant perversity is rated E. “Comic mischief” my ass.


Above: Careful what you wish for 


Above: Ashton Anchors will piss himself when he sees this 

 

Crime Scene – DS

This trailer is definitely a crime scene, and the victim is good taste. “Fine Comb the crime scene to find evidences!” is detective-talk for, “Rub your stylus all over the screen till you hit the right pixel, you idiotic chimp!” To further reinforce that you’ll spend most of the game using your eye or eyes, look for the eye strategically superimposed on the M in the logo. But why put the eye precisely on the letter M? As a tribute to Hitchcock’s Dial M for Murder?

Or possibly an homage to Fritz Lang’s 1931 expressionist/noir masterpiece M?

Or are my detective skills being clouded by my love for geeky film references? More importantly, who cares when you can use a UV light to discover bodily fluids in the carpet?


Above: All evidences point to a rowdy game of Party Fun Pirate 

Next page: Things that aren’t Starbuck, high-brow scrotal humor


 
41 Comments
Order Comments: Newest First | Oldest First
gmilf71  - 7 months 6 days ago 
- Comment removed by Community
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Cra-Z-Jake  - 7 months 6 days ago 
Paint chips.
DEFAULT  - 7 months 6 days ago 
Hooray for animals?
kubes  - 7 months 6 days ago 
nice a lot of trailers to keep me entertainededingment
Hobojedi  - 7 months 6 days ago 
1 way trip to the glue factory.. I'm sure many people would think that playing the horse breeding game.

And combat arms is real :3
IIIJabbaIII  - 7 months 6 days ago 
why does that horse have a little pony body but a huge Clydesdale sized head? O.o
see 0:27 of the trailer for the best view :P
Mittenz  - 7 months 6 days ago 
I would love to check out those pet games further, but I dont want to hear cCristmas Nights melting
reCAPTCHA: responce motels
walrusthewill  - 7 months 6 days ago 
As an idea for other weekly features i think it would be really good if you did a weekly post on jacka** things to do during online play
you could do a different game every week
jonbooey  - 7 months 6 days ago 
soo, who is the chick from the main page link for this article? Looks like a Lara Croft knock-off, but with massive...teeth...
jonbooey  - 7 months 6 days ago 
okay, Lara Croft that fell out of the ugly-tree and into a vat of silicon.
NotSteve  - 7 months 6 days ago 
What is it with these ridiculous, happy, rainbows-and-unicorns MMO crap fests clogging the internet lately? Between Armored Princess and that new "WOW for Tweens" thing SOE has in beta, I'll never be able to talk to another adult on the internet again.
gmilf71  - 7 months 6 days ago 
- Comment removed by Moderator
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gmilf71  - 7 months 6 days ago 
- Comment removed by Moderator
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gmilf71  - 7 months 6 days ago 
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iKOemos  - 7 months 6 days ago 
@ gmilf71- get over it douche. Great Trailer Trash Joe
jonbooey  - 7 months 6 days ago 
anyone else think gmilf71 is a wee bit steamed? I say keep the posts, it fits well with the trailer trash article. --okay, that was kinda mean.
Sebastian16  - 7 months 6 days ago 
Someone please ban Gmilf17.
gmilf71  - 7 months 6 days ago 
lololololololololololololololololol oh my god i cant believe someone hasn't taken down my comment yet. lol so funny.
gmilf71  - 7 months 6 days ago 
hey why does everyone put the @ symbol before the person's name they're talking to? doesn't make any sense. (yes i'm well aware that my three angry comments don't make sense either.)
still funny to watch everyone's angry replies to my comments. lol.
TripleAD  - 7 months 6 days ago 
Lol the pony's acting like what the game is... boring

I swear the last 3 are from the same company cuz they used real footage to make thier crappy game look good... which it dosen't.

@gmilf71 it means "at" so saying that means "at 'insert name here'
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