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The Top 7... Stupidest Puzzles

Ridiculous riddles that defy logic, common sense... and your patience

Words: Charlie Barratt, GamesRadar US
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44 Comments
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gilligan2021  - 1 year 2 months ago 
the largest WTF in the entire article is that little penis that follows you around in Touch Detective. As if that game title didn't arouse enough naughty thoughts...
ELpork  - 1 year 2 months ago 
I think all of the puzzles here could be solved with a well placed .50 stub noised pistol round.
JohnnyFirebird  - 1 year 2 months ago 
I finished Space Quest IV without a hint book. I do remember being baffled at that part, and basically hammering in a bunch of numbers until I got the right one. I was also 12 at the time, and finished the game without help in two days... sheesh. It wasn't that hard.
Iffo  - 1 year 2 months ago 
You want hard, illogical and often time sensitive puzzles, involving multiple seemingly unrelated actions by several characters? Go get the Gobliins series!!

These are just a few extreme examples but the whole genre was based around wacky illogical puzzles. The frustrating thing about many of these games was you had to ask yourself "What did the game designer want me to do here?" instead of "What do I do here?" ... and Sierra is the worst offender. Maybe it had something to do with their help line?

Anyway I really loved Lucas Arts and Legend quests back then!
The_Tingler  - 1 year 2 months ago 
Mostly great, but I will excuse the Escape From Monkey Island one because the lower windows and doors are locked, and the manager won't let you in.
Thequestion 121  - 1 year 2 months ago 
Wow. Those puzzles didn't make any sense whatsoever. Especially the cat mustache!
tacolord  - 1 year 2 months ago 
:O man....im glad i dont have to play these games! holy crap......pie? rubber inflatable ducks? cat mustache!!! i have to give my cat a shave now...
GreyDay  - 1 year 2 months ago 
Fantastic list, and as always hilariously pieced together with fitting imagery and charlie's wit
Scott1121  - 1 year 2 months ago 
OMG! those are terrible puzzles
CptCHARLES  - 1 year 2 months ago 
Ha, I liked the last one best 'cus it had the most complex and random solution and wasn't even important, I mean you look nothing like the guy and taking a cab could've worked a lot better!
gulfcoastfella  - 1 year 2 months ago 
Oh SH!T... puzzles in a puzzle game.
KEEPFROMFREEZIN  - 1 year 2 months ago 
doesnt pie just find a way to solve all of your problems?
GamesRadarCharlieBarratt  - 1 year 2 months ago 
- Modified by Moderator
Thanks for the positive feedback, everyone. In case it wasn't clear in the article, I personally LOVE all of these games (well, Touch Detective's just okay). I grew up on adventure games and miss them something terrible.
cricket0  - 1 year 2 months ago 
I hate puzzles that dont relate to anything!
smallberry  - 1 year 2 months ago 
Yeah as much as I love Gabe, that puzzle had it coming. Great article Charlie.
soren7550  - 1 year 1 month ago 
That last pic made me laugh. How about the puzzle in Half Life 2:Episode 2 where you have to go through an entire network of a giant bug infested mine (by yourself) so that you can get some bug juice to save Alyx. Oh, you can't kill the giant ass bug that's guarding the stuff, otherwise it won't work. But it can kill you all it wants. Good luck getting that bug juice!
katwood92  - 1 year 1 month ago 
I should be used to convoluted thought processes (mine can be very so, making things I say seem very random, even though it's not), but those are way out there.
sloppy  - 1 year 1 month ago 
- Comment removed by Moderator
Reported
lovinmyps3  - 1 year 1 month ago 
re4 was the only one of those i played, and that puzzle was easy

y dont they put the puzzle u gotta solve as ashley?
that was fukn hard!
dweller  - 1 year 1 month ago 
Yeah! I remember playing all those games except Gabriel Knight 3. I played the first two but just never got around to the third one. It's too bad though, I missed out on cat mustache.

As for Space Quest IV, CD-ROM version, I thought the code was the symbols right on the outside of the time machine.

Man, I still hate that puzzle in The Longest Journey!
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