Yes, grown gamers still like toys. Especially if they remind us of childhood memories, confirm our fandom of the games we love, or just inspire our imaginations. There is absolutely no shame in displaying cool toys.

By the way, ladies: We don’t collect dolls. They’re action figures. And we’ll argue about it until you wish you had a gun.

Gears of War action figures ($7-$56)
available at Amazon (including exclusive)
These are for Xbox 360 owners only (don’t take a chance with PC players wanting this), and yes, you could technically get these several places, such as the wonderful thinkgeek.com. However, Amazon also has an exclusive explody-head figure here in the US. And your gamer giftee needs that. Heck, everyone needs that. Even Grandma Betty. She loves the gore, you know.

Exclusive Gears of War Replica Lancer ($140)
from Amazon
This toy giant, bloody chainsaw gun is a great gift to give if you want a guarantee you’ll be beloved. And if they end up with two, no problem – eBay will eat this thing alive. Note that there was a battery pack issue with some of them, outlined here, but there’s a fix at the same link.

Real Action Heroes Raiden ($180)
available at play-asia
What about something for the PS3 player? Metal Gear Solid 2’s most hated character is redeemed by his megabadass appearance in Metal Gear Solid 4. Sure it’s expensive. But it’s 12 inches tall – that’s some serious figureage. Plus, when the spaceships land and the toys all come to life, your will kick the crap out of those sissy 7-inchers everyone else has.

Revoltech Street Fighter figures ($20)
available at jbox
Whether you go with Ryu or Chun-Li doesn’t matter. Both of these are hardcore and wildly posable. Just don’t go doing any obscene poses with Chun-Li, you pervert. And if you do, just know we did them all already.

Phazon Suit Samus ($225) and Zero Suit Samus ($110)
from First 4 Figures
What about the Nintendo players, you say? How about the amazing Phazon Suit Samus from First 4? There’s also a Zero Suit Samus on the way for those who want to showcase the curvy vixen inside the armor instead. Anything these guys make is impressive - Brett’s got the Skull Kid and it’s incredible. However, they sell out quickly, so order NOW. And tell the lucky recipient they’ll have to be satisfied with a picture of it for now, because these won’t ship until 2009. It’ll be worth the wait, we promise.

Donkey Kong Jenga ($25)
available at Amazon
Yeah, it’s still basically Jenga, which is still basically a party game. But it’s much, much cooler this way. Especially if you up the ante with alcohol and nudity.*

*Alcohol and nudity options are absolutely NOT recommended at a family holiday party. Not unless you want every subsequent year to include a story from Aunt Edna about the day you saw her tattoo. And trust us, you don’t.

LEGO Rogue Shadow ($50)
available at Amazon
Somehow, many of us grown men still have a fascination with LEGOs. Especially when we can use them to recreate something like Starkiller’s ship from Star Wars The Force Unleashed. And if that’s not your bag, how about kits based upon Batman or Indiana Jones? It’s not kiddie. It’s tribute.

November 26, 2008

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