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ClassicRadar: Nintendo video time capsule, 1997-2001

If the game in question wasn’t a tentpole release or a total longshot in need of some creative voice work, it likely ended up here – a collection of N64 and Game Boy Color titles that impressed next to no one and disappeared into the ether of time (but not in a cool poetic way, just boring).


Remember these?


Mega Man 64: Some consider the Mega Man Legends series a classic in its own right. Others think it’s the first misstep the franchise took that ultimately led the situation it’s in today. However, we can all agree it looks like shit today.

Star Wars: Shadows of the Empire: Lucas actually treated this product launch like a mini-movie, with a full John Williams soundtrack, novelization, specific toy line and, of course, a headliner N64 game that aged horribly.


Rocket: Robot on Wheels: Charming platformer from Sucker Punch, who went on to create the equally disarming Sly Cooper series and, most recently, inFamous for PS3.

Tonic Trouble: On the other end of the spectrum is this, a Rayman spin-off that critics mauled and consumers ignored. Included because it’s apparent how bad Ubi wanted Ed to become a new star – listen to how many times the guy says “Ed this” and “Ed that.”


Fighter Destiny II: Giving in to the surely roaring demand to Fighters Destiny, Imagineer and Ocean (both of which are essentially out of the games business now) spat up a sequel that no one played. Remarkable only because someone nobly tried to make a decent N64 brawler.

Ready 2 Rumble Boxing: Best known as a Dreamcast launch title, it also appeared on N64 and PSone. It was so-so then and just plain dreadful now.


Shadow Man: As far as N64 games go, this was a genuinely dark, disturbing and downright grisly adventure that kept us entertained for weeks. The PS2 sequel had stiffer competition and a struggling Acclaim to overcome.

Mary Kate & Ashley Pocket Planner: Be grateful this is no longer a viable franchise to milk. “Club Acclaim” barfed up untold numbers of MK&A games in a short span, most of them as shameful as the non-game planner seen above.


Tomb Raider: Nothing like its console sisters, the GBC version was a beautifully animated 2D platformer that performed surprisingly well. Though the guy voicing doesn’t sound like he knows what guns or tombs even are.

Bionic Commando: Before 2009’s next-gen letdown there was a 2000 re-imagining that also died on its feet. How can this idea be so hard to get right?

Warlocked: A Game Boy RTS? With decent visuals and animation? Pity this didn’t light up the charts, as it’s easily one of the system’s best (and most ambitious) games.


Star Craft 64: Same as with Command & Conquer – not sure why devs insisted on porting major PC RTS titles to a cartridge system, but hey, here it is.

Star Wars: Episode I Pod Racer: The film may make a tiny bit of vomit rise into your mouth, but this balls-to-the-space-walls racer really sold the idea of pod racing. If it weren’t for the hopelessly blurry graphics we’d still play this today.


Castlevania 64: We’ve grouped these two games together because the display another common trait these voiceovers have – terrible puns at the last minute. Castlevania needs a gag, huh? Better whip it… whip it good!

Spider-Man: The first Spidey game in some years, and the first to get the formula in place for today’s successful sequels (like say Web of Shadows). Ends with a very era-appropriate internet joke about webmasters. Timely!


Bonus! Game Boy Color ‘Get Into It’ spots


Like all companies interested in taking your money, Nintendo changes its advertising slant once in a while, usually when there’s something new to promote or when sales are slowing. In this case, it was the Game Boy Color’s last year in power (mere months before the GBA took over) and they needed to move units fast. So, we got this.

Final page: Late ‘90s, early ‘00s commercials that range from classic to zomgwtfbbq

19 comments

  • Nintygameplayerperson - May 2, 2011 12:16 a.m.

    THA LLLLEHDJEND AWF ZELDAH. AHKUREENAH AWF TAIM.
  • Fro4show - March 31, 2011 9:28 p.m.

    psshh I thought Kirby was fun. And Megaman Legends. AND about half of the other games you smashed on.
  • Kenzo - March 30, 2011 11:08 p.m.

    say what you will about the graphics but that pod racing game was awesome. game of choice at my friends house for years. also i remember that guy on the pokemon safari, thought the pokemon in the commercial looked awesome. not so much by today's standards.
  • alexk2064 - March 30, 2011 8:52 p.m.

    So, out of pure curiosity, I called the 800 number from the N-sider video. Still routes you to Nintendo. Menu options consist of hardware issues with the Wii or 3DS, parts, or game help. Thought you guys would wanna know.
  • philipshaw - March 30, 2011 8:43 p.m.

    Only Brett could think of an idea like this and I love you for it, I actually remember seeing some of these in a store back in the day
  • Finality - March 30, 2011 2:26 p.m.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5tTc8__lXkM This is probably still my favorite old pokemon commercial, I didn't see it in the videos up there.
  • ristar200 - March 30, 2011 12:26 a.m.

    HOLY SHIT YES now I can watch all of these videos on the good video player!
  • Jayzilla - March 30, 2011 12:25 a.m.

    hmm... lots of accents here I mean the Nascar and Conker gbc commercial guy...
  • Jayzilla - March 30, 2011 12:23 a.m.

    I think that guy with all the accents does lotsa cartoon voices. I'm pretty sure he's the Joker on Batman Brave and the Bold.
  • Harleynator - March 30, 2011 12:21 a.m.

    The Pokemon/ Gameboy color for Yellow where the bus driver murdered all the helpless pokemon by crushing them is the main one I remember
  • AirickG - March 30, 2011 12:20 a.m.

    Ah Pokemon Snap... Only Pokemon could take a terrible idea and make a pretty entertaining game, I don't even think I'd be opposed to a remake...
  • RonaldRayGun - March 30, 2011 12:15 a.m.

    I miss how terrible things used to be...
  • adamstephenson - March 30, 2011 12:05 a.m.

    I remember getting that Donkey Kong Country promo in the mail with the Jungle Trees VHS holder (what the hell do you call that). Wasn't the VHS itself yellow? and it felt like it only weighed about half an ounce because there was only a few minutes of tape on there. I bought into the hype, I thought I was like maybe one of 50 kids in the whole world that got that tape. The KI teaser at the end of it made me go bonkers too, an experience shared with probably every other kid who got that tape.
  • TheBrownestWRPGuknow - March 29, 2011 11:47 p.m.

    i love you, Gamesradar, for bringing really funny/interesting articles on a consistent basis. More specifically, good job Brett, this was a great nostalgia trip.
  • icedoesnthelp - March 29, 2011 8:18 p.m.

    "careful with those eggs" *throws egg*
  • mynameisjay - March 29, 2011 8:14 p.m.

    Seems like a lot of these come from those setups at Toys R Us back in the day.
  • juicenpancakes - March 29, 2011 7:53 p.m.

    Whenever I see any kind of promo video for Super Mario 64, my mind races back to a time where Best Buy had a giant column of like 30 TVs set up all synced up to a single N64, so you could stand anywhere in the Best Buy and watch this magnificent, new Mario game being played. It's when I became a man. ...no one else remembers this or had this happen did they?...
  • Redeater - March 29, 2011 7:46 p.m.

    Oh Conker.....what a suprise it was to go from Game Boy Color to Bad Fur Day.
  • batmanboy11 - March 29, 2011 7:44 p.m.

    ... I don't know what to say to thes monstrosities...

Showing 1-19 of 19 comments

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