Waffle irons, toasters and water coolers have gained self-awareness and a desperate desire to rip into human flesh, and it’s up to small group of typecast guinea pigs with jetpacks to save the day. So the story goes in G-force, a fuzzy-edged action game made to tie in to this summer’s blockbuster film.
Games used to be like this all the time. Stick two dudes (or dudettes) in a level, give them some big guns and throw wave after wave of even bigger enemies at them. Strap your finger to the fire button, keep moving, shoot everything that looks at you cock-eyed. Die, repeatedly. Hurl the controller at the cat’s smug face. Start the whole process again. With a sob and a sigh.
We don’t get it. We realise that there are people out there who like horse racing, and we realise that there are even people out there who like the G1 Jockey series of games.
You don’t know what vulnerable is until, in a roomful of people, you have stood perched bow-leggedly atop a Wii balance board, shaking the Nunchuk like a maraca while whipping a pretend horse’s backside on a television screen. It would be slightly less embarrassing to play a DS game powered by nakedness. On the train.
G1 Jockeys release is a byproduct of you and seven million other Wii owners reaching out for new games with your fourteen million clasping game-hands.
G1 Jockey comes recommended because of its neat career mode structure. You get to choose from a list of horses for each race, make decisions based on characteristics - which are presented as an intuitive list of light-up tabs and then see first-hand if you made the right choice as you straddle your decision while it pounds around a
Nov 7, 2007
A year before the Strugatsky brothers penned the novel that inspired S.T.A.L.K.E.R., they churned out the sixth installment of their “Noon Universe” series. Prisoners of Power was a subversive tale of totalitarianism and revolt set on a planet with an atmosphere so refractive the locals had to look straight up to see the horizon.
Were telling you all this because you wont learn it from playing the game allegedly based on the book. Galactic Assault: Prisoner of Power is
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