Every single game ever made wants your character dead. Well, unless it’s got dancing babies on its box or it’s trying to lose you weight by forcing you to swing your arms around like a twat. With that in mind, we thought it might be helpful to give you a guide on how to spot impending video game danger. After you’ve brushed up on our exhaustive guide, which covers every sure-fire sign of peril from ominous music to
This week's voices belong to... What to expect
- Our immediate thoughts on the latest God of War III footage- The podcast meeting that turned into a messy drink-a-thon- A new feature announcement for the TalkRadar UK- Your answers to Question of the Week*****************SPACE FOR IMAGES*******************
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Facelifts and other forms of cosmetic surgery aren’t just for aging MILFs, dried-up Hollywood C-listers and 40 stone blobs who have to get forklifted out of their beds. No, sometimes our favourite game stars need a bit of a nip and tuck too. After all, there’s no point battling hordes of the undead or saving the planet from a cult of religious alien zealots if you’re sporting last season’s armour or an out of date
With the possible exception of unexplainable, extraordinary inspiration, the factors which define a game’s quality are roughly quantifiable. The success of a game, however, involves slightly more chance, as the variables are less precise. When is the best time to launch a new PS3 exclusive FPS? Is there a market for fighting games on the Wii? The Western audience likes Final Fantasy – shouldn’t it like other Japanese RPGs?
We’re barely two weeks into 2010 and there’s already enough must-have games to choke one of Avatar’s six-legged horses. January alone is home to seven big-name releases, with February, March and April continuing the trend. Hell, we even know what’s coming in the summer and in some cases (like Halo Reach) we’re even certain of the fall’s heaviest hitter
Everyone knows about Max Payne taking all its best ideas (alright, one good idea) from the Matrix. But there have been many more games over the years that have taken their inspiration from Tinsel Town’s finest cinematic output. And when we say inspiration, we actually mean they broke out the tracing paper and copied these films' best scenes or stars almost exactly. And you know what? We’re thankful, because the nearly all of the
We like to end things on a positive note. That’s why 2009 was capped with not only our annual Platinum Chalice Awards, but also a whole week’s worth of celebratory articles talking about the accomplishments of the past decade. Now though, with ’09 safely out of range for a retaliatory strike, we can piss all over the idiotic, baffling and just plain dumb occurrences that peppered our otherwise fine year.
They might not look all that, but give them the wrong look and the following group of surprising badasses will kill the hell out of you. Wimpy either in appearance, profession or nature it doesn’t stop these secretly Chuck Norris hard characters from saving the world and giving evil the bird, while murdering hundreds of baddies in the process.
Somehow, though, we’re just not buying their unexplained ass-kicking
Has HD wonderment improved your favourite games? Or just screwed them right up?
A lot can happen in 10 years. And it has. As part of this week's post-mortem of the last decade in gaming, we now present for you some of the weirdest, depressing, arousing, significant, entertaining and amusing events, happenings and milestones that have occurred in the wonderful world of games during the soon-to-be-expired Noughties.