Age of Conan: The Ikea Adventures

Seeking an epically manly name for your new barbarian avatar? Look no further than your local Swedish furniture store!

Words: Dan_Stapleton on May 28, 2008

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Over Memorial Day weekend my girlfriend decided the shower curtain rings in our bathroom were the wrong color, which meant a trip to our local Ikea. Yes, I went too; I’m not completely whipped (yet), but going on couple-y expeditions like this buys me points that can be redeemed for several hours of uninterrupted gaming time that I can spend on my latest addiction, which at the moment happens to be Age of Conan.

Thus, barbarian warriors were very much on my brain as I waded through the aisles crowded with expecting mothers and college students furnishing their entire apartments on a budget of $150 (or $25 after you subtract the beer fund). And then, somewhere between the rugs and the kitchen section, it struck me: the absurd Swedish names arbitrarily assigned to each piece of furniture were better suited for Hyborian adventurers than home furnishings!

If you’re stuck coming up with a name for your character, I highly recommend checking out the Ikea.com catalog for inspiration. Just a few gems I spotted:

Detolf, the Aquilonian Barbarian and glass-door cabinet

Diska, the Cimmerian Conquerer and dishwashing brush (assorted colors)