7. Mort from Mort The Chicken
There's a certain lack of foresight in imagining that gamers of any age would want to play as a plain old broiler chicken. They could have a least called him SuperChicken or RoboChick or something.
Perhaps, the developer thought the unlikely nature of the game's star would make it a hit. After all, millions of people thought that Crazy Frog was so 'rubbish yet funny' that they downloaded the ring tone.
The second kick in the bollocks is that Mort is the most simplistic chicken they could have created. And just look how thin he is! From certain camera angles Mort is so narrow that he becomes almost invisible.
Unfortunately for Mort, there's no comforting 'at least the game was okay' caveat - it was terrible, the mechanically reclaimed meat of the children's game world.