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A version of this article originally posted in August of 2013.

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48 comments

  • TurkeyOnRye - June 28, 2014 6:15 a.m.

    I'm pretty sure "fuzzy pickles" is a euphemism. Creepy guy following around and taking pictures of kids.... totally fits.
  • rxb - June 27, 2014 7:59 a.m.

    Defalt is a sick dj, if he was real I'd buy his music. I think Ubisoft only named him Defalt for lack of a better name.
  • Sinsational - June 26, 2014 9:33 p.m.

    Ish is hands-down the one minor character I want to learn more about the most. Discovering his story in the sewers was one of the best experiences I've had in gaming. I had honestly hoped they would make a separate DLC for him, telling his story.
  • g1rldraco7 - June 26, 2014 5:32 p.m.

    The merchant guy from RE4 always made me wonder how he has all that weapons to start a small war. Still he's harmless though, he helps with gun and space upgrades.
  • AwkwardLoser - June 26, 2014 4:46 p.m.

    Isn't Uncle from RdR supposed to be "Red Harlow" from Red Dead Revolver?
  • christopher-camp - June 26, 2014 3:05 p.m.

    Could be The Mysterious Stranger is the narrator.
  • ryan-omalley - June 26, 2014 1:24 p.m.

    I randomly attacked the crestfallen warrior to see what would happen. He kept following me trying to kill me
  • Pruman - June 26, 2014 1:19 p.m.

    I always wondered if there was more to Siegfried/Ziegfried from Final Fantasy VI. He has a unique sprite and even a few lines of dialogue, yet shows up in only a couple of places in the game. Who is he? What is he after?
  • ashley-coonfield - May 14, 2014 7:28 a.m.

    Ser Jory from Dragon Age Origins
  • El_Rocky_Raccoon - April 28, 2014 10:55 p.m.

    Actually, if you noticed, the Merchant actually becomes a Ganado near the end of the game, as his eyes, at some point, become red. The Old Man being Ganon himself is a really nice theory.
  • Gangsta_Loc - April 28, 2014 12:45 a.m.

    Anyone remember this guy ? -> http://img3.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20110310085358/mk_/images/e/ed/Toasty_mk3.JPG Toasttyyyy
  • Evanesco - April 27, 2014 5:46 p.m.

    Mysterious Stranger from Red Dead Redemption beats all of these.
  • will-helton - May 13, 2014 6:23 p.m.

    *Mysterious Stranger from Fallout 3
  • wiitard07 - June 26, 2014 11:16 a.m.

    Well we pretty much know he's either a god or Satan figure. The confusion really comes when you wonder about how he fits into the realistic world.
  • punishment - March 24, 2014 6:02 p.m.

    I personally would like a backstory on Sarcastic Slab from Borderlands 2. He made me laugh way too hard. Couldn't kill him.
  • darkhunter909 - March 24, 2014 2:55 p.m.

    Ummm anyone who knows pokemon knows there is a huge family of nurse joys... They explain that in the show though i guess people these days would not know that due to it being an old episode.
  • jpic89 - April 28, 2014 7:15 a.m.

    And anybody who could actually read would notice they said in that slide that it is claimed they are all related, but anybody with a rudimentary understanding of genetics knows this doesn't explain anything.
  • darkhunter909 - April 28, 2014 12:44 p.m.

    Reading the whole thing is a waste of time. The explanations are often useless. And its a tv show rules of genetics don't apply.
  • jpic89 - April 28, 2014 3:56 p.m.

    Except that this whole article is an exercise in entertainment, and therefore the explanations are not useless, as they are the whole point of the article. Since they are taking farcical situations and applying logic to them to give humorous explanations that OBVIOUSLY are not true, because their intent is to be HUMOROUS, then there is no reason NOT to apply the rules of genetics to a tv show. Also, you still ignored the fact that, as I said, they DID mention the shows explanation, so your original comment of how nobody remembers it is STILL irrelevant.. And since you feel explanations are useless. TL;DR You are a dumbass.
  • Rub3z - August 29, 2013 8:43 p.m.

    SHOOT ME IN THE FACE! SHOOT ME IN THE FAAAAAAAAAACE! WANT IT! NEED IT! IT HAS TO HAPPEN! NOW! HNNNNNNNNNNG! I love how when you shoot him somewhere besides the face he says "NOT MY FACE!" And when you shoot him in the face he blurts a quick "THANK YOU!" before, y'know, dying of severe lead poisoning of the face.

Showing 1-20 of 48 comments

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