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61 terrible videogame shirts you must never wear

Never wear anything that appropriates a joke from Saturday Night Live

We were young once too, and we’ll admit that referencing a well known moment from SNL, or Monty Python, or Spinal Tap was not only good for a laugh, but made you and your friends feel superior to everyone else who didn’t get it. But let’s be clear: those are already so overused from repetition in all other forms of media, that seeing them used for some videogame joke shirt only makes them more groan-worthy.

Those are worse than regular joke shirts, because they aren’t even original. They may get a passing chuckle, but your friends are just being polite. They think you’re a giant loser for referencing something that, at best, is a decade old (like in the case of the Cowbell shirt). Why not just get one that says, “Schwing,” juxtaposed against an image of Zero Suit Samus, or “Did I do that?” in front of a Gears of War headshot.


Above: You’re welcome for the free idea, hacky t-shirt makers 


Try not to wear shirts that indicate you’re fat and have no life

We’ll admit these are kind of ironic, and might even be funny the first time you see them on some obese guy that rarely leaves his house. But you must be very secure in who you are to wear a shirt that points out your flaws so blatantly. Otherwise, it just looks to the world like you fulfill every stereotype people see gamers as having.

Also, we have to call bullshit on that last one. Video Game Rehab? First of all, somebody wearing it is obviously still playing games, so it looks like you’re a liar or that you’re weak and have fallen off the wagon. And second, if you run a legit Galaga rehab, why advertise using a Galaga sprite? That’s like getting Budweiser to create Alcoholics Anonymous ads.


For the love of God, don’t hate the player

Speaking of ancient sayings, “don’t hate the player, hate the game,” was old when it was said all the time on MTV in the mid-‘90s. By now, everybody should know this maxim, as well as its meaning. Now, wouldn’t it be funny if the term “player,” which is usually someone who gets a lot of dates, were to instead be used for a videogames-playing person?

Sorry to send you into a laughing fit with all these clever shirts, but we just had to share. By the way, that’s just all the shirts we found that involved players and hating them. There were more shirts that used the term player in a “humorous” fashion, but we decided to spare your funny bone by not including them.


Try not to wear any shirts that use ancient hip-hop slang

If you’re a sheltered, suburban kid, maybe you should avoid wearing shirts with sayings that would only fit in a '90s John Singleton film.

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102 comments

  • SwampRock - June 5, 2010 9:41 p.m.

    Oh man theres this shirt with a big daddy coming out of the ocean doing a shocker, and below it says bioshocker. does it make me a bad person for wanting it?
  • k-bloodpain - June 1, 2010 3:59 a.m.

    Any shirt with sonic the hedgehog on it is awlsome!!! NOT STUPIT!!:P
  • SeekerofSith - May 17, 2010 8:27 p.m.

    Blow me.....I don't get it.
  • AuthorityFigure - May 16, 2010 11:38 a.m.

    Enthusiasm transforms into embarassment easily if you're not careful.
  • jackthemenace - May 16, 2010 9:58 a.m.

    damn, i actually have one of those "nintendo rehab" shirts ¬___¬
  • likedamaster - May 15, 2010 2:05 p.m.

    It's the catch-phrases that make these t-shirts so bad. I would wear them otherwise.
  • KaiokenKid - May 13, 2010 4:31 a.m.

    The game shirts I own really only have the name of the game and a picture of it. I do have a Gear of War T-Shirt that has the Seriously achievment picture with the owrds Acheivment Unlocked over the title Gears of War. i also have a Halo 3 shirt that has the 3 logo with the phrase "finish the fight" on the back. So I really think those are OK, but im not sure. havent got any complaints yet. im eyeing a Castlevania SOTN T-Shirt I saw at hot Topic, which is where I get most of my shirts for some reason.
  • Bobbety - May 12, 2010 5:37 a.m.

    I just about bought that "I'd hit that" shirt a few days ago. Now that I think about it, it really is a incredibly stupid shirt. PS-Thanks for making sure I never buy a video game shirt Henry.
  • crisdace - May 12, 2010 2:49 a.m.

    Ummmmmmm, I'm ..... speechless?
  • jesseo - May 12, 2010 1:03 a.m.

    I can't believe that not only the author of this article referenced Nick Cage's The Wicker Man as something someone should watch and/or quote, but that one of the posts actually said it was, "pretty good." That movie was horrible and to call it horrible insults all other movies in that catagory. I don't know how the original was but the new one should never have existed, ever.
  • teke367 - May 11, 2010 4:55 p.m.

    I have a friend who has a shirt that says "up, up, down, down.." etc, I liked that one, but I wouldn't go out of my way to get one. If I happened to be in a store and saw it, then perhaps. Even then, its not something I could wear to work, so it'd be worn mostly at home anyway.
  • Apollomon - May 11, 2010 10:36 a.m.

    1. I dont actually understand cowbell hero? am i missing something 2. Mii love you long time? Seriously...that has to be the worst shirt EVER 3. actually i have never seen people wearing the blow me t-shirt...wonder why lol 4. None of my t-shirts are in the list, i have too much style...one of my fav t-shirts is my "home-schooled" one with NES cartridges on, love it!...admitedly i do own a Nintendogs t-shirt from the nintendo site using my points (my mates dont appreciate when i wear that)...my girlfriends a geek anyway and loves when im geeky- so score! :D
  • deanwalton - May 11, 2010 10:25 a.m.

    These t-shirts sure do suck! Most of them are really lazy too! The only good video game t-shirts out there are on Gamer Print: http://www.gamerprint.co.uk I f*#@ing love the Welcome to Rapture one!
  • Hellwilder - May 10, 2010 9:47 p.m.

    Let's accept it: Video Game shirts with any kind of joke are lame. If somebody thinks he is cool when he's wearing one of those; he fails at life
  • avantguardian - May 10, 2010 9:31 a.m.

    i don't know...the chillin like a villain one is so right/wrong it almost tears a hole through time and space...
  • theschwartzb - May 10, 2010 8:06 a.m.

    You know what T-Shirt you should also never wear but isn't video game related? The Vote for Pedro T-Shirt. That movie sucked donkey sack and anything based off of it sucks just as hard.
  • outuendo - May 10, 2010 4:29 a.m.

    I am ashamed to admit i do have one of the 61 shirts shown here. I have the Mega Man Scarface one. I still wear it because it's incredibly comfortable and it's the only Mega Man shirt I can find. Don't smite me?
  • Catalyst - May 10, 2010 4:03 a.m.

    This...this is why you don't buy "gaming" shirts at freakin' Hot Topic
  • sazzrah - May 10, 2010 2:40 a.m.

    I'm the proud owner of this t-shirt: http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1294/1152480488_7ba5afb6d6.jpg I know its uber nerdy and to many will be lame, and to many more will be unintelligible - but to me it's awesomesauce!

Showing 1-20 of 102 comments

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