We can't participate in a ten-minute conversation without dropping a quote from the world's favorite dullard. Maybe it's something about the name "Homer" that helps characters make an indelible mark on their culture, or more likely it's the sharp minds behind them.
Either way, we had a tough time boiling this list of our favorite Homer quotables down to 50, so be sure to let us know any we missed in the comments section below.
50. Staying In
The Quote: What's the point of going out? We're just gonna wind up back here anyway.
Why We Love It: Its a perfect glimpse into the mind of a binge-watcher.
The Quote: Ive learned that life is one crushing defeat after another until you just wish Flanders was dead.
Why We Love It: Homer always makes time to squeeze in a Flanders insult. Even if hes got nothing to do with the conversation.
48. Spin The Bottle
The Quote: My beer! You never had a chance to become my urine!
Why We Love It: An accidental smooch with Milhouse during a treehouse round of Spin The Bottle and Homers response? A genius ordering of his priorities.
47. The Future
The Quote: I believe that children are our future. Unless we stop them now.
Why We Love It: A brilliant example of misappropriating a popular culture phrase - in this case a lyric from Whitney Houston - and using it to bolster an argument. Bravo, Homer J.
The Quote: A boy without mischief is like a bowling ball without a liquid centre.
Why We Love It: Nonsensical analogies - perfect for rendering folks dumbstruck as they attempt to figure it out.
45. Film Quotin'
The Quote: "Look Marge, you don't know what it's like - I'm the one out there every day putting his ass on the line. And I'm not out of order! You're out of order! The whole freakin' system is out of order! You want the truth? You want the truth?! You can't HANDLE the truth! 'Cause when you reach over and put your hand into a pile of goo that was your best friend's face, you'll know what to do! Forget it, Marge, it's Chinatown!"
Why We Love It: Because weve all been there - attempting to inject a line of movie dialogue into everyday banter only for it to actually become two quotes from different movies, that err, dont aid your argument whatsoever.
44. Talking To God
The Quote: "Dear Lord, the gods have been good to me. As an offering, I present these milk and cookies. If you wish me to eat them instead, please give me no sign whatsoever... thy will be done."
Why We Love It: A useful nugget of wisdom that can also be applied to the handful of mince pies left out for Santa at Christmas.
43. The Internet
The Quote: The information superhighway showed the average person what some nerd thinks about Star Trek.
Why We Love It: A sweet snapshot into the history of the web, it was true when Homer first uttered it, and remains so today.
42. Break Ups
The Quote: Step aside everyone! Sensitive love letters are my specialty. 'Dear Baby, Welcome to Dumpsville. Population: you.'"
Why We Love It: Its crude, funny, and might actually work!
41. Dealing With Mr. Burns
The Quote: Oh yeah, what are you gonna do? Release the dogs? Or the bees? Or the dogs with bees in their mouths and when they bark, they shoot bees at you?
Why We Love It: Homers rant lets us all know that taking a glib remark too far can often be very, very funny.
The Quote: Operator! Give me the number for 911!
Why We Love It: Theres probably no better quote to adequately exhibit Homers crippling ineptitude.
The Quote: Ive gone back in time to when dinosaurs werent just confined to zoos.
Why We Love It: Ah, the infiltration of Jurassic Park into social consciousness. Fantastic.
The Quote: Im like that guy who single-handedly built the rocket and flew to the moon. What was his name? Apollo Creed?
Why We Love It: Because its worth letting this one slip when attending humdrum social occasions in an attempt to shake loose fellow film fans.
37. In The Theatre
The Quote: "Marge, this ticket doesn't just give me a seat. It also gives me the right, no, the duty to make a complete ass of myself."
Why We Love It: Kudos to the writers for using Homers terrible public behaviour to channel their thoughts on individuals who disrupt cinema experiences. By eck, who knew it was a duty?
36. Idiot Box
The Quote: Television! Teacher! Mother! Secret Lover.
Why We Love It: If we were stranded in the middle of nowhere, wed likely shriek the same mantra.
35. Quick Time
The Quote: Forty seconds? But I want it now!
Why We Love It: Weve all faced the microwave timer with the same thought - even if we do keep it to ourselves.
The Quote: Now Bart, since you broke Grandpa's teeth, he gets to break yours.
Why We Love It: Well, its only fair, right?
33. Anger Management
The Quote: "Yes, honey... Just squeeze your rage up into a bitter little ball and release it at an appropriate time, like that day I hit the referee with the whiskey bottle.
Why We Love It: Once more, it proves that following Homers advice is likely to result in an arrest.
The Quote: "The code of the schoolyard, Marge! The rules that teach a boy to be a man. Let's see. Don't tattle. Always make fun of those different from you. Never say anything, unless you're sure everyone feels exactly the same way you do."
Why We Love It: Because its quite possibly the worst advice you could bestow upon a child.
The Quote: I cant even say the word titmouse without giggling like a schoolgirl.
Why We Love It: Because we cant either.
The Quote: Lord help me, Im just not that bright.
Why We Love It: Hes so honest about his shortcomings; even if it doesnt exactly paint him in a favourable light. Aw, bless.
The Quote: Bart, with $10,000, wed be millionaires! We could buy all kinds of useful things like love!
Why We Love It: Hes such a loveable doof, despite being way off the mark on both counts you cant help but smile at his optimism.
The Quote: To alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.
Why We Love It: Homers got an iota of responsibility towards his drinking habit, raising a glass with the knowledge of what may follow... well, in this one scene, anyway.
27. Life Goals
The Quote: All my life I've had one dream, to achieve my many goals.
Why We Love It: Where to start?
The Quote: Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try.
Why We Love It: Its a hilarious spin on typical parental advice; all that matters is that you tried your best. No wonder Barts always scribbling at the blackboard...
25. Precocious Kiddies
The Quote: I think the saddest day of my life was when I realised I could beat my dad at most things, and Bart experienced that at the age of four.
Why We Love It: A double-pronged classic Homerism, starts with a wander down a nostalgic memory lane before making light of Homers relationship with Bart. Brilliant.
24. TV Is The Answer
The Quote: When will I learn? The answer to life's problems aren't at the bottom of a bottle, they're on TV!
Why We Love It: Because its a sneakily brilliant quote to use when your other half gives you the evil side eye for opening another drinkie... and then lets you dictate the TV schedule as a compromise. Result!
23. The Shinning
The Quote: No TV and no beer makes Homer something something.
Why We Love It: Even in his portrayal of a tormented psychotic writer, Homer still bumbles his way through the most iconic line of the film hes parodying.
The Quote: Being popular is the most important thing in the world!
Why We Love It: An early spot of parenting advice to Bart from way back in season one, its so silly that theres no way we couldnt love it.
The Quote: Aw, people can come up with statistics to prove anything, Kent. Fourteen percent of all people know that.
Why We Love It: Whether or not this specific episode is the origin of this joke, its a timeless gag that never fails to raise a smile.
20. Hoarding Homer
The Quote: "Are you mad, woman? You never know when an old calendar might come in handy. Sure, it's not 1985 now, but who knows what tomorrow will bring? And these TV guides... so many memories..."
Why We Love It: One of Homer Js most nonsensical arguments, yet its strangely interesting to note - is there a sly nod to Back To The Future here?
19. The Elderly
The Quote: Old people don't need companionship. They need to be isolated and studied so it can be determined what nutrients they have that might be extracted for our personal use.
Why We Love It: Sounds to us like Homers barmy notion could be spun into a controversial sci-fi flick - Cocoon meets Splice?
18. Sexual Politics
The Quote: Remember that postcard Grandpa sent us from Florida of that Alligator biting that woman's bottom? That's right, we all thought it was hilarious. But, it turns out we were wrong. That alligator was sexually harassing that woman.
Why We Love It: The climate of political correctness has never been ripped into with such scathing ridicule!
The Quote: I'm normally not a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me Superman.
Why We Love It: For all of his rants and queries about religion, its heartening to know that in times of crisis, Homer, like us, turns to the man of steel for guidance.
The Quote: I saw this movie about a bus that had to SPEED around a city, keeping its SPEED over fifty, and if its SPEED dropped, it would explode! I think it was called 'The Bus That Couldn't Slow Down.'
Why We Love It: Because its hilarious.
15. Marge The Cop
The Quote: When I first heard that Marge was joining the police academy, I thought it would be fun and zany, you know like that movie... Spaceballs. But instead it was dark and disturbing, like that movie Police Academy.
Why We Love It: The commendation here is deserved by The Simpsons writers, for their witty meta-riffs on cinematic comedy - and their second sly elbow into the ribs of Police Academy.
The Quote: Theyre my only escape from the drudgery of work and family no offense.
Why We Love It: While we believe its possible to maintain a healthy relationship with movies (ahem), Homers response is still killer.
13. Watching TV
The Quote: It's not easy to juggle a pregnant wife and a troubled child, but somehow I managed to fit in eight hours of TV a day.
Why We Love It: Because weve all experienced the incessant need to digest as many movies and boxsets as possible whilst holding down our familial obligations.
12. Suit You, Sir
The Quote: Maybe, just once, someone will call me 'Sir' without adding, 'You're making a scene.
Why We Love It: Homers knowledge of his own behaviour is both poignant and amusing at the same time.
The Quote: Marge, don't discourage the boy! Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals! Except the weasel.
Why We Love It: Its another standard slice of Homeresque parenting.
10. The Facts Of Life
The Quote: Facts are meaningless. You could use facts to prove anything that's even remotely true.
Why We Love It: In typical Homer fashion hes managed to prove a point he intended to disprove.
The Quote: Books are useless! I only ever read one book, To Kill A Mockingbird, and it gave me absolutely no insight on how to kill mockingbirds! Sure it taught me not to judge a man by the colour of his skin but what good does that do me?
Why We Love It: Homers unknowing irony on misleading literary titles is winning; most of all its funny, and comes with a giant helping of social commentary. And he does have a point about the title.
The Quote: If somethings hard to do, then its not worth doing.
Why We Love It: The antithesis of many revered maxims on hard work, its comforting to turn to this when faced with compiling Harvard-standard referencing for your PhD bibliography.
The Quote: Fame was like a drug. But what was even more like a drug were the drugs.
Why We Love It: Who needs a simile when things are best compared to themselves?
6. Civic Duty
The Quote: Getting out of jury duty is easy. The trick is to say you're prejudiced against all races.
Why We Love It: As is the case with a fair wodge of Homers aphorisms, this has a nugget of truth to it!
5. Computer Illiteracy
The Quote: To Start Press Any Key'. Where's the ANY key?
Why We Love It: ...because weve all taken instructions too literally before.
4. Meeting Aliens
The Quote: Oh my God, space aliens. Please don't eat me! I have a wife and kids. Eat them!
Why We Love It: An honest admission most folks would take to their deaths, Homer bypasses his conscience for a far funnier exchange with extraterrestrials.
3. Work Ethic
The Quote: Lisa, if you don't like your job you don't strike. You just go in every day and do it really half-assed. That's the American way.
Why We Love It: Theres no sugar coating of advice before it is dispensed to his offspring - his slacker nature is worn with pride akin to something acquired by actual hard graft. Hurrah for honesty!
2. The Lottery
The Quote: Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They're about to announce the lottery numbers.
Why We Love It: Is this wry oxymoronic statement, delivered in earnest to his tearaway son, Bart, proof of Homers hidden intellectual side? No, probably not.
1. Classic Catchphrase
The Quote: Doh!
Why We Love It: Homers classic go-to phrase captures his doltish nature perfectly, and is adopted for usage in most of his day-to-day activities.
Bonus point! An amusing utterance, Doh grabbed ahold of popular culture and never lost its grip, going so far as to warrant entry into the Oxford English Dictionary in 2001.