The '80s Original:
Coming-of-ager from John Hughes, starring the Brat Pack likes of Molly Ringwald, Judd Nelson, Anthony Michael Hall, Ally Sheedy and Emilio Estevez, who attend weekend detention at school.
Why They Should Never Remake It:
Nowadays, there's no such thing as a Brat Pack, meaning any contemporary ensemble would be unable to touch the magnificence of the original breakfast clubbers.
If They Really Have To:
We say chuck a monster into the mix. Now the kids have to survive school AND BEING EATEN ALIVE.