Girls Just Wanna Have Fun
The Moment: Angie might have scooped a Golden Globe for her performance in Gia (1998), but what that film will always best be remembered for is her numerous rolls in the hay with co-star Elizabeth Mitchell. People are fickle like that.
The Sexy: The scene involving the chain-link fence is probably the most downright saucy. Lucky old fence…
If It Was Frumpy: Poor Ange would get her knitted cardigan caught in one of the links and spend the next half an hour tutting as she attempts to untangle it.
The Moment: Angie steams things up every time she’s onscreen in Wanted (2008), but never more so than when she steps out of the bath and sashays off in just a towel. James McAvoy is left understandably open-mouthed.
The Sexy: Take your pick from her briefly-seen bum, the flirty look over her shoulder or her array of badass tattoos… all of them are sexy as hell!
If It Was Frumpy: Having her haul herself out of a walk-in bath would lessen the impact somewhat…
The Moment: A 2001 photoshoot with Dave LaChapelle, in which Angie stars with a horse in a series of ever-more erotic poses. The above example of interspecial nuzzling has to be seen to be believed!
The Sexy: These snaps tread a fine line between sexy and troubling, but just about land on the right side thanks to Jolie’s wild-child persona.
If It Was Frumpy: She’d be fully covered up in riding gear. Although on second thoughts…
The Moment: Ethan Hawke arrives at Angie’s door in erotic thriller Taking Lives (2004), undressing her without a word before proceeding to the naughty stuff. It’s like something from The Red Shoe Diaries !
The Sexy: They do it surrounded by crime scene photos. Who doesn’t find that hot?
If It Was Frumpy: There would be a lot more fuss removing various layers, tights, socks, etc. As it is, her clothes just kind of fall off!
The Moment: Angie is enlisted by crinkly rockers The Rolling Stones to play a stripper in the video for their 1997 single Anyone Seen My Baby? Naturally, she steals the show.
The Sexy: Standing next to Mick Jagger, a paving slab could look attractive, so when Angelina Jolie is the co-star in question… well let’s just say it’s a winning piece of casting.
If It Was Frumpy: Marianne Faithfull would have bagged the role. Sorry Marianne.
Home Wrecker: Part 1
The Moment: Air traffic control drama Pushing Tin (1999) isn’t memorable for much, but Angie’s turn as frustrated housewife Mary certainly stands out, particularly when she seduces John Cusack into a spot of mutual infidelity…
The Sexy: She’s got the femme fatale thing down pat here, and poor old John is helpless to resist. Who can blame him?
If It Was Frumpy: Ange would leap out of bed halfway through having remembered she left some scones in the oven.
Home Wrecker: Part 2
The Moment: Brad and Angie set about tearing strips off each other at the climax of Mr. & Mrs. Smith (2005) before channelling all that aggression into a particularly energetic bout of lovemaking. Phew!
The Sexy: Their passion is, shall we say, “believable”. We can only hope Jennifer Aniston has never sat through this in its entirety.
If It Was Frumpy: The session would be brought to an abrupt halt as soon as the first ornament was smashed.
The Moment: Who would have thought that a picture of a girl eating a strawberry could become so iconic? This early photo-shoot would go on to become the go-to snap for editors everywhere… well, it is pretty hot, isn’t it?
The Sexy: As you can see, it’s all about the lips here. Angie’s most famous assets have never looked better.
If It Was Frumpy: Substitute the strawberry for a potato. It’s not quite the same, is it?
Tit For Tatt
The Moment: Jolie plays teen tearaway Legs in coming-of-age crime caper Foxfire (1996), and nowhere is her bad-girl allure more evident than when she tattoos herself (on her chest, naturally) at an all-girl get-together.
The Sexy: Apart from the obvious (she’s, er, topless), it’s the pervading sense of teen rebellion that’s most bewitching here. She could be trouble, this one!
If It Was Frumpy: She’d be sporting a fading blue anchor on one of her fleshy, drooping arms.
Here's To You, Mrs Grendel
The Moment: When Grendel’s dear old mum attempts to seduce burly Ray Winstone in Beowulf (2007). Will they get it on? Bet in play… now!
The Sexy: Computer-generated it might be, but there’s no getting away from the fact that Angie’s not wearing any clothes… at all. Plus she has a rather slinky tail, which is the one area we’ve always thought she could improve upon.
If It Was Frumpy: She’d hop back out of the water before muttering, “I’ll wait ‘til it warms up a bit”.