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21 Stars Who Should Host The 2010 Oscars

So Hugh Jackman is officially not returning as Oscar host next year. Which made us ask you lot who you thought should get the job.

Once again, our awesome readers have stepped up, so we're picking and publishing our favourites.

Here are 21 of the best…

Kermit The Frog

Suggested By: ReynardCity

Past Form: If Kermit became Oscar host he’d have to introduce a wide variety of weird, wild and wonderful characters who’d make bad jokes, do dance numbers, and occasionally wield wacky props. It’s The Muppet Show with fancier outfits, basically.

Show Highlight: When Gonzo launches himself out of a cannon to present the lifetime achievement Oscar.

Sample Speech: “And now a man who needs no introduction, so what am I doing out here?”

 



Kanye West

Suggested By: Tiny_Winchester

Past Form: If the Academy wants press for their little Awards ceremony, they should hire Kanye. It seems that he can’t attend an event without causing some controversy – imagine what he’d do as host .

Show Highlight: The opening montage, directed by Spike Jonze, which ends with West descending on wires from the ceiling, vomiting rose petals on the audience.

Sample Speech:
"Yo James Cameron. I’m really happy for you. I’ma let you finish but Scorsese had one of the best movies of all time. One of the best movies of all time!”

 

Next: RoboCop, Pamela Anderson

 

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RoboCop

Suggested by: ReynardCity

Past Form:
RoboCop has never been given the opportunity to present a major awards show. Which is an absolute disgrace.

Show Highlight:
Overhearing someone muttering that Leonardo DiCaprio stole the Best Actor Oscar from Morgan Freeman, RoboCop swivels around and shoots Leo point blank in the chest.

Sample Speech : “Conduct your Oscar acceptance speech. You have ten seconds to comply.”

 



Pamela Anderson

Suggested By:
tomswenchie

Past Form: Okay, so she doesn’t have a lot of experience. She’s never hosted the Grammys, or the Emmys. But we’re pretty sure she’s presented an MTV Award, does that count?

Show Highlight : The opening few minutes, when Borat carries Pamela onto the stage in a sack, and she jumps out in her Baywatch outfit. It’s very confusing for people who haven’t seen / don’t really remember Borat.

Sample Speech: The lyrics to the Baywatch theme tune, as she runs around the stage for the 23rd time.

 

Next: Trey Parker & Matt Stone, Kevin Smith, The Cast Of Dr Horrible

 

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Trey Parker And Matt Stone


Suggested By: Chris Barnes ( Facebook )

Past Form: Parker and Stone haven't got much in the way of presenting experience (though they did co-host the 1998 Creative Arts Emmys, which counts for almost nothing, much like the awards themselves), but they're certainly outspoken, smart (and smart-ass) talkers.

Show Highlights:
Word of warning to the awards producers, though - you're gonna need a seven MINUTE delay, let alone a seven second one.

But wouldn't it be fun to see thesping types they've insulted over the years challenge them to gladiatorial combat on stage? Even if it's just with giant foam sticks…

Sample Speech
: "And now, the required political bit. (As Sean Penn) Last year I went to Iraq. Before Team America showed up, it was a happy place. They had flowery meadows and rainbow skies, and rivers made of chocolate, where the children danced and laughed and played with gumdrop smiles."



Kevin Smith

Suggested By: Mark Jones ( Facebook )

Past Form: Smith's had one or two minor hosting gigs in the past, but where he's really worked is in his live Q&As, where he takes questions from the audience. Rambling and hilarious, he has to be experienced to be believed.

Show Highlights: Like Parker and Stone, he'd need a swear button, but he could bring on some more famous friends - like Ben Affleck - to help out with the wattage of the night.

It would be the first ever Oscars where the host opens the event with a monologue entirely dedicated to A) anal fissures and B) anal sex with his wife. Wait… Didn't David Letterman do that already?

Sample Speech:
"That's why you'll never see my name next to Scorsese, Woody Allen, and Spike Lee. Scorsese speaks a lot at NYU, and I'm damn skippy no one's ever been like, 'I'll suck your d**k for five bucks!'"



Neil Patrick Harris and Nathan Fillion. In their Dr Horrible costumes.

Suggested By: FreddieBoz , Ross Davidson, Chris Barnes, Scott Mason ( Facebook )

Past Form: NPH has been blazing a path through awards show hosting duties - with great performances on the Tonys and the Emmys under his belt. Fillion is simply charm personified.

Show Highlights: Think Hugh Jackman did a lot of musical numbers? Imagine the whole show like that. NPH is a broadway veteran and Fillion can carry a tune, so if they recruit a few more singing thesps, it's a whole musical!

Might have to make an exception for the acceptance speeches, though.

Sample Speech:
"It's curtains for you, academy president. Lacy, gently wafting curtains."

Next: Bruce Campbell, Quentin Tarantino

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Bruce Campbell

Suggested By:
Alex Beadle ( Facebook )

Past Form: Campbell has a big following, even if it's not exactly mainstream. But maybe that's what the Oscars needs - an injection of B-Movie cred. Campbell hasn't presented a lot, but he's got a mouth on him…

Show Highlights:
Sam Raimi can direct a special segment where the host gets abused in a variety of inventive ways.

And what awards show wouldn't benefit from some ancient demons on the stage? Hell, they let Jack Nicholson attend every year…

Sample Speech:
"Keep your damn filthy bones outta my mouth."
 



Quentin Tarantino


Suggested By: John Hudson ( Facebook )

Past Form: A chatty chap, he's been to enough awards shows as recipient and presenter to know the drill. Plus, as John suggests, he's such a motormouth that the Oscars would be over in half an hour and everyone can get to the bar.

Show Highlights: He can edit the montages in his own, chronology-skipping, violence-adding style. And we can't wait to see what he'd do with the In Memoriam segment.

Plus, he can bring some of his cool casts back together and script their presenting remarks. Expect a tidal wave of pop culture riffs and profanity.

Sample Speech:
"Let me tell you what An Education is about. It's all about a girl who digs a guy with a big d**k. The entire movie. It's a metaphor for big d***s."

Next: Robert Downey Jr, Samuel L Jackson

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Robert Downey Jr

Suggested By:
Dominic Ching, Chris Durnan ( Facebook )

Past Form: Downey is well into his big return, with the Iron Man movies, Tropic Thunder and Sherlock Holmes. But he's also a funny bloke, as anyone who has heard him in interviews and on stage at events can attest. Quick-witted and razor sharp, he'll be a self-deprecating, audience-friendly host.

Show Highlights:
Making a call to the effects team who worked on Iron Man, Downey Jr can plan a spectacular entrance as he jets in from the rafters.

And that repulser cannon would be great if anyone's speech runs long. Even if they do need a pulley system to make it work in real life.

Sample Speech: "Everybody knows you never go full retard."



Samuel L Jackson

Suggested By : XlittlemissdeppX , Richard Joseph Delafield ( Facebook )

Past Form: A larger-than-life personality, Jackson has hosted a few smaller shows in his time, and his hefty career has the respect of most of Hollywood.

Samuel L "mother f*****g" Jackson could keep things moving just by staring at people on stage.

Show Highlights: Jackson tees off the show with golf gags for the older Hollywood crowd, before fighting an intelligent mutant shark (this time, SLJ wins, you toothy bitch!) and making sure everyone knows he's carrying.

Sure, it might mean that a few celebrities are lost along the way, but there's always some dead wood at these things anyway.

Sample Speech: (to a winner) "You're gonna kiss the sun and taste the m**********n’ rainbow."

Next: Christoph Waltz, Werner Herzog

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Christoph Waltz

Suggested By: Flrsi

Past Form: Waltz has been suggested for just about every role since his screen-storming role as Hans Landa in Inglourious Basterds. In interviews, he's proved a charming type and while he's never hosted a show, he's a solid actor.

Show Highlights: He could be one of the few Oscar hosts who actually nabs an award the night he's running the podium, so that would be something to see.

Plus we think he should do a backstage chat segment with the winners backstage, all capped by him drinking a delicious glass of milk.

Sample Speech: "Is that the way you say it: "That's a bingo?"
 

 

Werner Herzog

Suggested By: johnparkinson

Past Form: Interesting choice this one - occasionally outspoken, often challenging and how many times do you see a director host eat his own shoe for a bet?

Show Highlights:
Herzog gets the show rolling with a deconstruction of what the cinematic world defines as "best" and what an "award" truly is.

Then it's on to a drug-crazed Nicolas Cage running across the stage while each winner tries to give their speech. It'd be one to remember, that's for sure…

Sample Speech:
"It is my duty because this might be the inner chronicle of what we are, and we have to articulate ourselves. Otherwise we would be cows in the field."

Next: Simon Pegg & Nick Frost, Will Ferrell

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Simon Pegg & Nick Frost

Suggested By: Loutubes

Past Form:
Longtime friends and a proven comedy combo with the likes of TV's Spaced and Shaun Of The Dead/Hot Fuzz behind them on the big screen. They're hilarious, real and they could draw a healthily younger audience to the awards show.

Show Highlights:
All the nominees (well, the acting ones) are impersonated by Peter Serafinowicz instead of clip reels.

There's also a tribute to George Lucas that turns into the show trial he's had coming his way since Phantom Menace.

Sample Speech: "Well, I wouldn't argue that it wasn't a no-holds-barred, adrenaline-fueled thrill ride. But there is no way you can perpetrate that amount of carnage and mayhem and not incur a considerable amount of paperwork."



Will Ferrell

Suggested By: Sarxos

Past Form:
More specifically, Will Ferrell as George W Bush, though as someone else pointed out, Ferrell could easily play a few other characters too. He's done an entire stage show as Bush and is a solid speaker.

Show Highlights:
Bush opens the show with some patriotic rhetoric, while castigating the "Hollywood phonies." Then it's time for Who Can Survive Dick Cheney's Shotgun?

For a musical interlude, why not Ron Burgundy and his jazz flute? He could even play it during the Memoriam montage...

Sample Speech:
"I'm very important. I have many leather-bound books and my apartment smells of rich mahogany."

Next: Alfred Hitchcock, Ricky Gervais

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Alfred Hitchcock


Suggested By:
Kim Chillout Lawther ( Facebook )

Past Form: Sure he's more passed on than past form, but who wouldn't love to see the master of suspense as the master of ceremonies? Hitchcock was an erudite, commanding presence, so he could work as a host. Might need a medium, though…

Show Highlights: Taking over every element of the show, the consummate professional also decides to scare the audience occasional, while revealing that all the women who escort winners off stage are actually blokes in dresses with mother issues.

And we're sure he'd find some way to cameo in speeches and montages the way he does in his movies.

Sample Speech: "A good film is when the price of the dinner, the theatre admission and the babysitter were worth it."



Ricky Gervais

Suggested By: Toby Hone ( Facebook )

Past Form: He's just been given the Golden Globes after killing during presenting segments at the Emmys. With a cutting wit and self-mocking form, he'd liven up the event no end.

Show Highlights: The running gag of fake animosity between Gervais and US Office star Steve Carell could meet its natural peak with a two-hour-long staring competition. Well, anything's better than another montage about how good comedy films have been this year.

And talking of montages, how about Ricky sneaks one in about how successful his films have been? It's funny because it's not true.

If it all goes wrong, at least he can do the dance...

Sample Speech: "Some people are intimidated when talking to large numbers of people in an entertaining way. Not me."

Next: Steve Carell, Wall-E

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Steve Carell


Suggested By: Jane Glenholmes ( Facebook )

Past Form: Carrell has a history of off-the-cuff comedy ability, improv training and a great, charming style. After you've worked on The Daily Show and The Office, you should be able to do anything.

Show Highlights: As with Gervais, if Carell hosts, we'd want to see him work something up between the two of them. Perhaps the pair could have a host-off, and let the audience decide at the end of the night who won?

Plus, given his experience with the Judd Apatow crew, we'd be hoping for actually funny appearances by the likes of Paul Rudd, Seth Rogen and Jonah Hill.

Sample Speech:
"Would I rather be feared or loved? Um... Easy, both. I want people to be afraid of how much they love me.."


Wall-E

Suggested By: NinjaNh

Past Form: As Ninja suggests, "He's likable, he doesn't drone on for ages and he's got the dance moves." Yes, Pixar's little robot that could certainly has appeal, though we fear his voice capabilities might have to be upgraded lest the entire show become about him and EVE.

Show Highlights:
Pixar takes over the Oscars with presenters animated by the team and guest appearances by past characters from their films. Who doesn't want to see Emperor Zurg handing out a special effects award?

Plus, Wall-E can interpret all the Best Song contenders in his own, inimitable style.

Sample Speech: "Wall-E!" (told you it would be a bit Wall-E focused).

Next: Robert Pattinson, Tina Fey

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Robert Pattinson

Suggested By: Kayrose16

Past Form: He might not have a lot of hosting gigs, or indeed acting gigs in his young career, but A) he's British and would add cred and B) more importantly, he's Edward Freaking Cullen and the show's audience would shoot up by millions, even if they are all shrieking girls and their mothers.

Show Highlights: Pattinson introduces Taylor Lautner, who presents an award with his shirt off. A little over half the viewing audience produces a sound that can be heard on Mars, even through the vacuum of space.

And we want a self-spoofing moment near the start where he's shot with a glue/glitter canon just for good measure.

Sample Speech: (Looking at an Oscar) "I hate you for making me want you so much."



Tina Fey

Suggested By: Us! (find us on Twitter here )

Past Form:
The writer/creator of 30 Rock and an awards show star (see past Emmy acceptance speeches), Fey was a highlight of the 2009 Oscars when she was paired with Steve Martin.

Show Highlights: We'd definitely want an appearance by Martin, if only to get that banter back again.

But Fey could bring some real humour to the event, especially if she has her 30 Rock writers' room punch up the script.

Sample Speech:
" I like to crack the jokes now and again, but it's only because I struggle with math ."

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