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18 Twittered Typo Remakes

 

A week ago, we asked our brilliant Twitter followers to @ us some typo remakes.

We asked them to take a movie title, change one letter and completely change the story of the movie. In exchange, we'd plot and publish our favourites.

Here are eighteen of the very best...

 

Se8en



Suggested by: MrPointyHead

The Original : Brad Pitt and Morgan Freeman chase a serial killer who themes his murders to match the seven deadly sins from the bible. Hilarity ensues.



The Typo Remake:
‘80s set religious horror. Church leaders discover a bible misprint that reveals the number of the beast isn’t 6 after all, it’s 8.

The Vicar Military are tasked with destroying Satan, or ‘Se8en’ as he’s dubbed, as he tries to take over the world via Teletext subtitles.

Starring:
Kurt Russell as the lead soldier vicar, Dawn French as his cocky partner, Phoebe Cates as a bikini nun.

Dream Director: John Carpenter on a good day.

 

Sew VI

Suggested by : sinelinden

The Original: Arguably the most influential horror film of the past decade, Saw inspired every single torture porn flick that followed it.

Saw VI carries on the tradition of quickly editing shots of death-traps to convey the message that people should appreciate their lives.



Typo Remake:
Arguably the most influential sewing film of the past decade, Sew inspired every single needle porn flick that followed it.

Sew VI carries on the tradition of slowly editing shots of drop-stitches to convey the message that people should appreciate their cushions.

Starring: Maggie Smith, Julie Walters, Tobin Bell.

Dream Director: James Wan and Mike Leigh.

 

Next: Tsar Wars, Dellboy: The Golden Army

 

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Tsar Wars



Suggested by : bensholto

The Original:
You know the story, evil Empire rules the galaxy, plucky rebels conspire to take them down.

A big dog, a cowboy, a farmboy and an experimental hair-model gang up against an asthmatic and somehow become heroes.



Typo Remake: You know the story, evil Emperor rules Russia, plucky mutineers conspire to take him down.

The Volinsky Regiment, the Ismailovsky, the Semonovsky, the Litovsky and the Preobrajensky Guard gang up against Nicolas II and somehow become heroes.

Dream Cast: Viggo Mortenson as Nicolas II, Christopher Walken as Han Solo.

Dream Director: David Cronenberg.

 

Dellboy: The Golden Army



Suggested by: Ben_pedley

The Original: Follow-up to the cult comic-book adaptation, which sees Hellboy and his mates hunting for an ancient artefact they can use to defeat a gang of golden warriors.



Typo Remake:
Follow-up to the popular BBC adaptation, which sees Dellboy and his brother Rodney hunting for an ancient bit of tat they can flog to a gang of market traders.

Dream Cast: David Jason, Nicholas Lyndhurst, Ron Perlman.

Dream Director: Richard Curtis.

 

Next: Pilates Of The Caribbean, Jurassic Nark

 

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Pilates of the Caribbean



Suggested by : MikeChannell

The Original: Boozed-up pirate Jack Sparrow bumps into a pair of toffs, tricks them into an adventure on the high seas.

Entertaining for huge stretches of the run-time.



The Typo Remake:
Boozed-up pilate instructor Jack Sparrow bumps into a pair of toffs, tricks them into signing up for a class.

Huge stretches are dull for the most of the run-time.

Dream Cast: Madonna, Johnny Depp.

Dream Director: Guy Ritchie.

 

Jurassic Nark



Suggested by:
mooseymoose29

The Original:
Doddering old genius invents dinosaurs, and tries to make a theme park out of them. But when he loses control, they escape and go on a rampage. Meanwhile, a couple of archaeologists and the kids in their care have to fight to survive.


 
The Typo Remake: Doddering old gangster informs police on his rivals, and tries to get them sent to prison. But when he loses his memory, they escape on a technicality. Meanwhile, a couple of his kids trying to put him into care have to fight to survive.

Dream Cast: Michael Caine, Jeff Goldblum

Dream Director: Richard Attenborough

 

Next: Zombielend, Petty Woman

 

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Zombielend



Suggested by : sinelinden

The Original:
The US Shaun Of The Dead relocates the action to middle America, as a gang of yanks attempt to survive a zombie apocalypse.



Typo Remake:
The UK Zombielend relocates the action to Barclays Bank, as a gang of small businessmen attempt to survive applying for a bank loan during a zombie apocalypse.

Dream Cast: Ricky Gervais, Martin Freeman, Woody Harrelson.

Dream Director: Stephen Merchant.

 

Petty Woman



Suggested by
: JennyWorsley

The Original:
High-class hooker Vivian Ward gets swept off her feet by a charming businessman after he hires her for the night. But will their differences bring them together, or tear them apart?



Typo Remake:
First-class whinger Vivian Ward moans the ears off her boring businessman husband after he marries her. But will her complaints bring them together, or tear them apart?

Dream Cast: Julia Roberts, Richard Gere.

Dream Director : Eli Roth.

 

Next: Bi, Cot Fuzz

 

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Bi



Suggested by:
d_levy

The Original: Kid goes to a fairground, asks a wishmaking machine to make him big. The next morning, he wakes up a grown-up and embarks on a series of adventures involving toys, whipped cream and silly string.



Typo Remake
: Tom Hanks goes to a gay club, asks a bartender to make him bi. The next morning, he wakes up next to a guy and embarks on a series of adventures involving toys, whipped cream and silly string.

Dream Cast: Tom Hanks, Tim Allen as the bartender.

Dream Director: Tom Hanks, Tim Allen using a handheld camcorder.
 

Cot Fuzz



Suggested by: gfitzger

The Original: Frost and Pegg play two very different coppers in this action parody. Nick’s a laid-back country cop, Simon’s an uptight city cop; they  have to work together to solve a village-based crime-spree.



Typo Remake: Frost and Pegg voice two very different toddlers in this cartoon comedy. Nick’s a laid-back nursery kid, Simon’s an uptight baby; they have to work together to solve a blanket-based mystery.

Dream Cast: Nick Frost, Simon Pegg.

Dream Director: Edgar Wright.

 

Next: GhostLusters, Iron Can

 

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GhostLusters



Suggested by: theGlimmerTwin

The Original: Three unemployed parapsychology professors develop a ghost removal business, hunt spooks and nearly cause the end of the world. Hilarious comedy.



Typo Remake: An unemployed funeral director develops a ghost sex addiction, digs up corpses and nearly causes the end of his marriage. Disturbing thriller.

Dream Cast: Bill Murray.

Dream Director: Harold Ramis.

 

 

Iron Can



Suggested by:
StephenWM

The Original: Exciting adaptation of the Marvel comic. We follow Tony Stark, an arms dealer who gains a conscience after inventing the coolest weapon of all time, and saving America. He declares himself a pacifist, in between killing terrorists.



Typo Remake:
Exciting adaptation of nothing. We follow Toby Park, a food manufacture who gains a court summons after accidentally replacing tin with iron at his factory, and poisoning America. He declares himself a vegetarian, in between eating steaks.

Dream Cast: Daniel Day Lewis.

Dream Director: Paul Thomas Anderson.

 

Next: Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Cones, Die Herd

 

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Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Cones



Suggested by:
alannamooney

The Original: George Lucas’ turgid prequel sequel, which sees Anakin Skywalker taking Padmé Amidala on a series of awkward dates, while Obi Wan strokes his beard over an assassination attempt, uncovering a plot to create an army made entirely of clone warriors. Disappointing.



Typo Remake:
George Lucas’ turgid prequel sequel, which sees Anakin Skywalker taking Padmé Amidala on a series of awkward driving lessons, while Obi Wan strokes his beard over a hit and run attempt, uncovering a plot to create a road made entirely out of traffic cones. Confusing.

Dream Cast: Exactly the same as Attack Of The Clones.

Dream Director: David Lynch.

 

 

Die Herd



Suggested by:
sowasred2012

The Original: New York cop John McClane is having a very bad day. He’s travelled to LA to visit his wife, arriving to discover her office building has been taken over by terrorists. McClane has to take them down, using the weapons he finds along the way.



Typo Remake: Farmer Jack McCain is having a very bad day. He’s travelled to the chicken shed to visit his wife, arriving to discover the coop has been taken over by cows. McCain has to take them down, using a pitchfork he finds along the way.

Dream Cast: The bloke from Last Of The Summer Wine.

Dream Director: The bloke from Last Of The Summer Wine.

 

Next: The Man In The Ron Mask, Starface

 

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The Man In The Ron Mask



Suggested by: frankiecarboni

The Original: King Louis XIV has a secret kind twin brother who he holds prisoner, forcing him to wear an iron mask to conceal his identity. The three musketeers conspire to replace the arrogant king with his twin, so they can free France.



Typo Remake: Daniel Radcliffe has a secret shy twin brother who he holds prisoner, forcing him to wear a Ron Weasley mask to conceal his identity.  Three supporting Harry Potter players conspire to replace the confident actor with his shy twin, so they can get some of the limelight.

Dream Cast: The cast of Harry Potter.

Dream Director: Christian Bale.

 

 

Starface



Suggested by:
d_levy

The Original:
The rise and rise of a Cuban drug dealer, who moves from humble beginnings to eventually taking over an entire drug empire. Eventually, greed causes him to die in a blizzard of cocaine. Key line of dialogue: “Say hello to my little friend!”



Typo Remake: The rise and rise of a KISS tribute band, as they move from playing pubs to eventually playing the Hackney Empire. Eventually, groupies cause them to die in a blizzard of cocaine. Key line of dialogue: “Say hello to my little friend!”

Dream Cast: KISS.

Dream Director: Gene Simmons.

 

Next: Flight Of The Na'vigator, Animal Hose

 

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Flight Of The Na'vigator



Suggested by: FreddoJr

The Original:
A kid is abducted by aliens, returning to earth 8 years later with a new best friend; a flying saucer. The ‘80s were a weird time.

Typo Remake: A kid is abducted by blue cat-people, returning to earth 8 years later with a new best friend; a blue alligator with massive dragon’s wings. It's a Na'vi gator. That can fly.

Dream Cast: Sam Worthington, people who live in computers.

Dream Director: JC. No, not Jesus. The other JC.

 

Animal Hose



Suggested by
: koduckgirl

The Original: The story of a gang of students living in a wild college frat house, as they toga, toga, toga their way out of trouble from the college dean.



Typo Remake: Wacky family comedy about a workaholic divorced dad named David, who spends so much time in the office, he hardly sees his kids.

In fact, he’s let them down so much that they no longer want to see him.

Because he's never in it, he cares so little about his home that it has fallen into disrepair; his paint is peeling, his rooms are messy and his garden is overgrown.

But when his neighbours file a court order, claiming his house is bringing down prices of the entire street, our hero is forced to clean it up. He repaints the house, cuts the lawn, and gets out the garden hose.

Only, when he turns it on, it spits out animals instead of water. It starts slowly, with a few mice, then as the spray gets bigger, elephants start thudding out.

Once word gets around the neighbourhood that David has an Animal Hose, he becomes popular with every kid in town, except his own.

Having fun with the neighbourhood kids, he realises just how much he’s missed out on with his own children, and resolves to win them back, using the animals that sputter out of his hose, animals that are become increasingly mythological…

Dream Cast: Jim Carrey as David, Robin Williams as his angry neighbour, Megan Fox as a sexy fox, Sean Connery as a griffin.

Dream Director: Michael Bay.

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