100 Reasons fanboys hate Nintendo (2008)

Want to make a Nintendo fanboy crap a book about puking? Watch this!

Words: on March 24, 2010

Perhaps the most loyal fanboys of all are Nintendo fanboys, which make them easy targets for fanboys of other companies. Want to make a Nintendo fanboy crap a book about puking? Back in Week of Hate ‘08, that was the primary goal on our mind. So if you want to see your beloved Nintendo dragged through the mud all over again, clench your sphincters and hit play.

3 things we’d add for 2010: Reggie’s “I’d be embarrassed if I were them” comments, DSi XL dick joke, misleading HD Metroid screens

Your guide to the entries:

1. RAM Expansion
2. Pikachu N64
3. Hey You! Pikachu
4. Nine years of B&W; Game Boy
5. DS Lite has different charger
6. "Gamers were bored before Wii"
7. Still advertising Wii Sports
8. Electroplankton
9. Watermelon N64
10. Controller Paks
11. Sensor Bar
12. Burying us in Pokemon...
13. virtual migraine
14. Super Scope 6
15. Solar Jetman
16. Celebs toting GameCubes
17. "My name is Reggie. I'm about kicking ass."
18. ROB
19. Excitebike don't work!
20. Mario 2 is a dream
21. Censoring blood in MK
22. Play it Loud! ads
23. Super fx chip
24. Luigi's Mansion
25. Friend Codes
26. Motion Controls gimmicky
27. Weak Wii hardware
28. No hard drive
29. 480p max rez
30. Lazy designers don't use touch screen on DS
31. Industry bully (esp. '80s)
32. Wii Fit
33. Game Boy Micro
34. The Wizard - PowerGlove scene
35. Weak 3rd party support
36. Same shit, different Zelda
37. Starfox Adventures
38. "High horse" attitude
39. Mario is Missing
40. Miis lack customization
41. Piss-poor online setup
42. GameCube modem
43. Expensive cart games (N64)
44. Letting Rare go crazy
45. GBA connectivity underused
46. Abandoning the hardcore
47. Mario & Sonic at the Olympic Games
48. N64-DD
49. Still no portable GC
50. Zelda CD-I games (50)
51. The Dog from Duck Hunt
52. Red Steel ad - loser hiding behind couch
53. Wiimote condom
54. Wii have a problem
55. Media blacklisting
56. Wii Parties (evites)
57. Nintendo hates the environment (Greenpeace)
58. Wii marketing materials - 12yo girl b-day party
59. NES controller - rectangular corners
60. N64 Controller 'L' Button
61. GC Controller - kidneys, 1 bumper, etc.
62. Super Mario Sunshine Graffiti missions
63. Miis can't do anything worthwhile!
64. Shortages - STILL?!?
65. Link looks like the elf from Rudolph
66. Real games, plz (magnetica, brain age, big brain academy, vision training, flash focus, picross)
67. Mario Party injuries
68. Old Man carrying a load in his pants
69. No online freebies like Japan
70. Wind Waker makeover
71. Lost Final Fantasy to Sony
72. Mom's Wii blog
73. Wii tour for soccer moms
74. Wii Photo Channel
75. You know, for kids!! (Manhunt 2)
76. Sailing in Wind Waker
77. Sailing in Phantom Hourglass
78. Sailing in Uncharted Waters
79. Cooking games
80. SMB movie
81. Hot Topic merchandise whoring
82. Gamecube handle
83. Crap RPGS
84. Iwata: "Customers don't want online games."
85. GBA cart batteries dying
86. Cookie cutter games: NinjaBread Man / Annubis 2 / Rock n Roll Adventures / Billy the Wizard
87. Nicole Kidman DS ads in Europe
88. Finally got Crystal Chronicles
89. Crappy DS ports of big-name games (Need for Speed, Burnout, Call of Duty etc)
90. Kid electrocuted in Thailand
91. Yamauchi: "Our Customers don't know what they want."
92. Yamauchi: "[People who play RPGs are] depressed gamers who like to sit alone in their dark rooms and play slow games."
93. Yamauchi: "Customers are not interested in grand games"
94. Classic franchise not selling well - Metroid
95. GameBoy peripherals that suck: e-reader
96. ...printer
97. ...back light
98. ...front light
99. ...pocket recording studio
100. Glut of crappy Virtual Console games

Related

Platforms:

Xbox 360, PS3, PC

7 Comments
Order Comments: Newest First | Oldest First
  • philipshaw

    philipshaw  - 2 years, 1 month ago  - Report

    Classic GR, this never gets old but wish there was new videos for 2010
  • AuthorityFigure

    AuthorityFigure  - 2 years, 1 month ago  - Report

    That list is huge - those gripes are the cost that any successful company make you suffer. Name one successful corp. that doesn't have a list of shit they've made us wade through. Yet we beg for more...

    Profound!
  • Maiestas777

    Maiestas777  - 2 years, 1 month ago  - Report

    @Sneakers:

    Xbox Hate:

    http://www.gamesradar.com/f/100-reasons-fanboys-hate-xbox-2008/a-20100323982878082

    Sony Hate:

    http://www.gamesradar.com/f/100-reasons-fanboys-hate-sony-2008/a-2010032311257749038

    And, although the PS3 and 360 are getting motion controls, they are add-ons, not the focus of the system. The Wii is a one trick pony. A fun one, but it is all in the one gimmick of motion control.
  • Sneakers

    Sneakers  - 2 years, 1 month ago  - Report

    "26. Motion Controls gimmicky"

    Yeah, Sony and Xbox fanboys ranted that stupid phrase for years...can't be true now, because both Sony and Xbox will now both have motion control. Can't be gimmicky is Sony and Xbox has it, can it? :P Morons.

    As much as I agree with a fair bit of the list, alot of the reasons are very stupid and trivial reasons to hate a company for. Some of the things were their first try at something, like the NES controller. I mean Sony and Microsoft aren't gold ever so perfect.

    Sure Nintendo made mistakes, they aren't perfect, but they took chances. People just want to be so smart and point out all Nintendo's mistakes and flaws...it's the past. No one wants to point out any flaws that precious Sony or Microsoft makes. Move on with your lives.
  • Picnic1

    Picnic1  - 2 years, 1 month ago  - Report

    What was wrong with Luigi's Mansion, the Gamecube handle and controller?

    All cute, much better than the dated minimalism of the Wii's design.
  • BluePikmin

    BluePikmin  - 2 years, 1 month ago  - Report

    As a hardcore Pokemon fan (Paradox lol), even I laughed at my friend for ages when he go a pikachu N64
  • Teh_Ty

    Teh_Ty  - 2 years, 1 month ago  - Report

    Classic. I can;t believe I used to be a die-hard nintendo fanboy
Most Commented
Connect with GamesRadar