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The Stormtrooper has always been symbolic of everything that’s awesome about Comic-Con, but that doesn’t mean they’ve got it easy. Everybody wants a picture, you’ve got no pockets, and everybody still blames you for what happened on Alderan. We felt it important to emphasize that beneath the iconic exterior of white battle armor beats the heart of a vulnerable human being, one who’s susceptible to the same long lines, overpriced food, letdowns, and general exhaustion that any of us are.
Clones are people too, so what sucks for us can be even more hellish on them when not operating under the authority of the Galactic Empire. In order to humanize our friend the Stormtrooper, we’re counting down the difficulties we all face at San Diego’s annual pop culture throwdown. Because just like life and droids, some SDCC experiences just aren’t the ones you’re looking for.
1. Waiting in line for the bathroom
“Seriously?! Most of these people don’t even have to deal with a cod piece – Move your Bladders!”
2. Picking out a gift for your girlfriend
“Is she a size 2 or 3? Crap, I can never remember…”
3. Security does not show preferential treatment
“I swear I was just in there! Can I please just grab my laptop bag?”
4. Checking out the competition
“It’s nice, but if my boss sees me in it I could get fired.”
5. Haggling over the price of comics
“PLEASE?! I’m in this issue and I just want to show my mom.”
6. Just missing out on that last Comic-Con exclusive
“C’mon, man… I promised it to my nephew and you’re just going to put it on eBay.”
7. Crossovers can be dangerous
“I swear I’ve never even served on Asgard!”
8. Comic book elitists treat you like second class citizens
“Bro, it’s all fantasy! Why ya gotta hate?”
9. The Starbucks queue is always ridiculous
“For chrissake, I could’ve picked the beans myself by now…”
10. Old “friends” can pop up out of nowhere
“Okay, one picture, DM. What… no I don’t have any money you can borrow.”
Big thanks to Garet Jones for helping us out and contributing to the silliness. We’ll miss ya Comic-Con
Jul 25, 2011
